I have an 18 year old son, who will be 19 next month. He has Asperger's, and mental health issues: severe depression, anxiety, ADHD. He is supposed to be starting his senior year. He is behind in school because of his birthday being in the fall and he repeated first grade because of difficulty learning to read. I have been stressed over the senior year costs, but I have been looking forward to this year. I wanted to be able to celebrate and enjoy this last year with him. Now he might not even be here, and I'm concerned about him running away and maybe not finishing high school.
He has tried off and on to get job, but gets discouraged easily and gives up. He has a hard time following through with applications. When he does get applications submitted, and he doesn't get hired, he takes it extremely hard.He also can't drive, and does not have a car, so he has to work out getting a ride or it has to be close enough to walk.
I am divorced from his dad, and we live in another state, but you can make the drive in a day. He has been angry and resentful since we move here because it took him away from his school and his visits with his dad aren't as often (Christmas and Summer only).We moved for safety reasons, more job options for me, and lower cost of living. It was really to benefit the family, and not to make his life miserable.
He has these fits of rage, teenager versions of two-year-old temper tantrums. He yells at me, slams doors so hard the walls shake, hurts himself and sometimes destroys his things. It happened again last night. He ran out and refused to come back home. He was texting a neighbor through his phone. He said he was leaving the state and not coming back. ...he has no money, left his wallet with his I.D., and was on foot... She talked him into coming home to talk to me.
I called his dad in Texas. He says that he can go back to live with him, but he won't come get him or buy him a ticket because he can't afford it. He also says he will help him get enrolled in school there, but he can't buy him any clothes or school supplies because he and his wife can barely afford that for their other son. I honestly have serious doubts about him not being able to afford to. He earns more than me, works two jobs, and his wife works. But whatever.
So I said that I could buy him a bus ticket next weekend, but I really can't afford it. I need the money for other things. I still have to buy school things for the boys. My car is broken down, I'm behind on bills, and my other son needs surgery and I'll be missing work (pay) for that. Instead of being honest with him, his dad told him that I said I would buy a ticket for him, and that he can return to Texas next Saturday.
I have an angry kid who is acting like I owe him and I have ruined his life. He walked back home last night, but refused to talk to me until this morning. I told him we have to work out a plan because I can't send him to Texas, or drive him there, and he can't treat me the way he does. If he stays, he has to stop acting that way. If he wants to go, he will have to wait until it is time for their Christmas visit, or get a job and pay his own way to get himself and his stuff there.
There is so much tension in my home right now. I'm half expecting him to blow up again, or hurt himself. It wouldn't take much to make him run away. The thing that keeps running through my mind is a fact that a huge percentage of homeless people have mental health and developmental disabilities. At this point, I'm afraid my son is at risk for that.
He has tried off and on to get job, but gets discouraged easily and gives up. He has a hard time following through with applications. When he does get applications submitted, and he doesn't get hired, he takes it extremely hard.He also can't drive, and does not have a car, so he has to work out getting a ride or it has to be close enough to walk.
I am divorced from his dad, and we live in another state, but you can make the drive in a day. He has been angry and resentful since we move here because it took him away from his school and his visits with his dad aren't as often (Christmas and Summer only).We moved for safety reasons, more job options for me, and lower cost of living. It was really to benefit the family, and not to make his life miserable.
He has these fits of rage, teenager versions of two-year-old temper tantrums. He yells at me, slams doors so hard the walls shake, hurts himself and sometimes destroys his things. It happened again last night. He ran out and refused to come back home. He was texting a neighbor through his phone. He said he was leaving the state and not coming back. ...he has no money, left his wallet with his I.D., and was on foot... She talked him into coming home to talk to me.
I called his dad in Texas. He says that he can go back to live with him, but he won't come get him or buy him a ticket because he can't afford it. He also says he will help him get enrolled in school there, but he can't buy him any clothes or school supplies because he and his wife can barely afford that for their other son. I honestly have serious doubts about him not being able to afford to. He earns more than me, works two jobs, and his wife works. But whatever.
So I said that I could buy him a bus ticket next weekend, but I really can't afford it. I need the money for other things. I still have to buy school things for the boys. My car is broken down, I'm behind on bills, and my other son needs surgery and I'll be missing work (pay) for that. Instead of being honest with him, his dad told him that I said I would buy a ticket for him, and that he can return to Texas next Saturday.
I have an angry kid who is acting like I owe him and I have ruined his life. He walked back home last night, but refused to talk to me until this morning. I told him we have to work out a plan because I can't send him to Texas, or drive him there, and he can't treat me the way he does. If he stays, he has to stop acting that way. If he wants to go, he will have to wait until it is time for their Christmas visit, or get a job and pay his own way to get himself and his stuff there.
There is so much tension in my home right now. I'm half expecting him to blow up again, or hurt himself. It wouldn't take much to make him run away. The thing that keeps running through my mind is a fact that a huge percentage of homeless people have mental health and developmental disabilities. At this point, I'm afraid my son is at risk for that.
