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The Writers Guild
Writing a book on Free Will in man
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<blockquote data-quote="Ophiolite" data-source="post: 77588125" data-attributes="member: 234799"><p>I noticed no one had commented on your efforts and wanted to offer my brief observations as a form of encouragement. I have read only a small portion of the work, but these thoughts may be of use to you.</p><p></p><p>First, the a considerable strength in what you have written is that it is clear and your argument is developed in a logical fashion. At least in the early pages there is no rambling, non sequiturs, or wooly thinking. </p><p></p><p>I've picked out a couple of instances where I think you have been verbose. If you tighten up such instances it will further strengthen the clarity and flow of the book. I have entered your words within quotation marks and my suggested amendments in italics.</p><p></p><p>"So basically that broken down means that God has before creation chosen a select group for salvation, and a select group for damnation."</p><p><em>That means that God has before creation chosen a select group for salvation, and a select group for damnation.</em></p><p></p><p>"I would like to suggest each of us is born in a state of the unknown, we don’t know how to be saved, and we don’t know what God requires."</p><p><em>I suggest each of us is born in a state of the unknown, we don’t know how to be saved, and we don’t know what God requires.</em></p><p><strong>Or even better: </strong><em>Each of us is born in a state of the unknown, we don’t know how to be saved, and we don’t know what God requires.</em></p><p></p><p>"We have seen some of the perceived disadvantages of Calvinism, now we will move to the argument for free will as found in scripture, and the Early Church."</p><p><em>We move from the perceived disadvantages of Calvinism to the argument for free will as found in scripture and the Early Church.</em></p><p></p><p>I wish you well in your endeavour.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Ophiolite, post: 77588125, member: 234799"] I noticed no one had commented on your efforts and wanted to offer my brief observations as a form of encouragement. I have read only a small portion of the work, but these thoughts may be of use to you. First, the a considerable strength in what you have written is that it is clear and your argument is developed in a logical fashion. At least in the early pages there is no rambling, non sequiturs, or wooly thinking. I've picked out a couple of instances where I think you have been verbose. If you tighten up such instances it will further strengthen the clarity and flow of the book. I have entered your words within quotation marks and my suggested amendments in italics. "So basically that broken down means that God has before creation chosen a select group for salvation, and a select group for damnation." [I]That means that God has before creation chosen a select group for salvation, and a select group for damnation.[/I] "I would like to suggest each of us is born in a state of the unknown, we don’t know how to be saved, and we don’t know what God requires." [I]I suggest each of us is born in a state of the unknown, we don’t know how to be saved, and we don’t know what God requires.[/I] [B]Or even better: [/B][I]Each of us is born in a state of the unknown, we don’t know how to be saved, and we don’t know what God requires.[/I][B][/B] "We have seen some of the perceived disadvantages of Calvinism, now we will move to the argument for free will as found in scripture, and the Early Church." [I]We move from the perceived disadvantages of Calvinism to the argument for free will as found in scripture and the Early Church.[/I] I wish you well in your endeavour. [/QUOTE]
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