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Momzilla
13th February 2004, 11:52 AM
I promise I'll start saving up my questions and posting several in a single thread, but this one is on my mind right now so I'll go ahead and ask it. Are any of you married to a non-Orthodox Christian, or do you know anyone who is? Are compromises made to accommodate the non-orthodox spouse? How does the church view such marriages?

I'm married to a non-practicing Christian. He is supportive of my faith journey, but he naturally wonders how changes would affect him. And, the last thing I want is for my faith to drive him away from Christ.

Oblio
13th February 2004, 12:03 PM
Out of what is termed economy, adjustments are made in Orthopraxis if you are married to a non-Orthodox. This is done in consultation with your spiritual father/confessor.

Momzilla
13th February 2004, 12:14 PM
Thank you, Oblio. Your response is a great comfort to me. I'll stop worring about problems I don't have now!

Suzannah
13th February 2004, 01:02 PM
I'm glad you feel better about that. To answer your question : yes, I am married to a "jack" Mormon who is content to remain a simple Christian and at first, was very hostile to my search and interest in Orthodoxy. The priest of my church has counseled that it is okay to bend on things like the fast, in order to accomodate my husband. But, prayers of people here, and at the church, some good old fashioned honesty and a well -timed "rebuke" at one point, have wrought a 100% change. He no longer makes wise cracks and is completely okay with all of it.
Amazing, the power of our Lord!

Matrona
13th February 2004, 01:20 PM
I'm married to a non-practicing Christian. He is supportive of my faith journey, but he naturally wonders how changes would affect him. And, the last thing I want is for my faith to drive him away from Christ.
Is he baptized? For the record, an Orthodox Christian can be married in the church to a baptized Christian of any denomination, as long as the baptism is done in the name of the Holy Trinity: "I baptize you in the name of the Father, and the Son, and the Holy Spirit." (Mormon and Jehovah's Witness baptisms are not valid since those groups do not believe in the Trinity.) I'm not sure how this works for converts (married converts have their marriages 'blessed' in the church, they don't need to go through the whole ceremony, nor are they considered to have been 'unmarried' before this).

Down the line, if you decide Orthodoxy might be the path for you, it would be good for both you and your husband to talk to a priest together. I know personally two Orthodox women at my church whose husbands are not Orthodox, and they do just fine. God bless! :)

ufonium2
13th February 2004, 01:47 PM
There are also several women in my church married to non-Orthodox men. The funny thing is, the husbands sing in the choir, serve as business advisors for the board,etc. and are seemingly more active than their wives. One of them never misses a Sunday while his wife comes like once a month.

On a related note, my Protestant (for now, anyway ;) ) boyfriend is coming to visit this weekend and will be attending an Orthodox service for the first time this Sunday. Prior to our dating, his entire knowledge of Orthodoxy consisted of watching "My Big Fat Greek Wedding," so pray for us!!

ChoirDir
13th February 2004, 02:25 PM
Prior to our dating, his entire knowledge of Orthodoxy consisted of watching "My Big Fat Greek Wedding," so pray for us!!

Sign of the times, I remember when it was "The Deer Hunter"

MariaRegina
13th February 2004, 10:14 PM
Sign of the times, I remember when it was "The Deer Hunter"

I'd rather watch My Big Fat Greek Wedding over The Deer Hunter. At least both of those are better than Zorba the Greek.

Re: Deer Hunter - have to admit that the shots of that gorgeous Russian Church in the midst of the dire poverty in that town was quite a contrast.

I've talked with several people who have investigated Orthodoxy with the production of My Big Fat Greek Wedding. The Jews on our West Side refer to the film as "My Big Fat Jewish Wedding." While the Hispanics call it "My Big Fat Spanish Wedding."

Orthodox Andrew
14th February 2004, 12:53 AM
Personally I question the practice of marrying Christians of all denoms, and not marrying those of all religions in the Church. I really think if your going to wed somebody who rejects Icons or the title Theotokos, than you may as well wed somebody that's a Muslim. It just seems hypocritical to me.

Orthodox Andrew
14th February 2004, 01:47 AM
I'd rather watch My Big Fat Greek Wedding over The Deer Hunter. At least both of those are better than Zorba the Greek.

Re: Deer Hunter - have to admit that the shots of that gorgeous Russian Church in the midst of the dire poverty in that town was quite a contrast.

I've talked with several people who have investigated Orthodoxy with the production of My Big Fat Greek Wedding. The Jews on our West Side refer to the film as "My Big Fat Jewish Wedding." While the Hispanics call it "My Big Fat Spanish Wedding."
What didn't you like about Zorba the Greek?

Photini
14th February 2004, 01:59 AM
I was under the impression that in order to have an Orthodox wedding, both bride and groom has to be Orthodox.

On a side note...I was married civilly (via courtroom) and later divorced. I was told that the Church does not recognize that marriage as valid and sees me as never having been married at all. That was actually a great relief for me.

MariaRegina
14th February 2004, 02:01 AM
The opening of Zorba was messed up.

The children were shouting "the Americans" (in Greek of course,) but everyone started laughing because the children were shouting at the American film crew!

I don't like Zorba the Greek! And I really didn't like The Deer Hunter either due to the scenes of Russian Roulette. Recently a Greek Orthodox teenager killed himself by playing Russian Roulette after watching The Deer Hunter.

Zorba has the scene in the Church with the beautiful Kyrie eleison in the background, and shows the village men plotting the widow's death. Then they kill her (not showing mercy) with the Kyrie still in the background. It's so hypocritical.

It reminds me of some posters here who say such sarcastic and judgmental things about other Christians and then end their posts by typing in a Christian greeting. What are these people thinking? It's so hypocritical and this unchristian behavior is not a good witness to those who are searching or to those who visit CF in search of Christianity.

Lord have mercy on us and save us.

I fail to but I'm trying to change and put on Christ.

I guess we are all hypocrites at times.

Orthodox Andrew
14th February 2004, 02:02 AM
The opening of Zorba was messed up.

The children were shouting "the Americans" (in Greek of course,) but everyone started laughing because the children were shouting at the American film crew!
:D I never knew that. I have yet to see the movie.

Oblio
14th February 2004, 02:07 AM
I was under the impression that in order to have an Orthodox wedding, both bride and groom has to be Orthodox.


I thought they both had to be Christian, and one of them must be Orthodox. But I may have this confused with something else.

Matrona
14th February 2004, 02:09 AM
I was under the impression that in order to have an Orthodox wedding, both bride and groom has to be Orthodox.It's seen as preferable (and personally I can't imagine being married to someone who wasn't Orthodox, I don't think I could live like that), but it is not required.

Still, I keep my sights set on nice Orthodox boys. I have had an evangelical "Christian" boy dump me about a year ago because he knew I was going to become Orthodox (I was a catechumen at the time) and he 'didn't know' whether we 'believed in the same Christ' or not. :rolleyes:

And after the way I got to, um, know him, I'd say DEFINITELY NOT.

So anyway, that's why I stay the hell away from the Campus Crusaders, and I scope out the single guys at OCF every week. ;)

Matrona
14th February 2004, 02:12 AM
I thought they both had to be Christian, and one of them must be Orthodox. But I may have this confused with something else.
That's right, one must be Orthodox, but if the other is not Orthodox, he or she must be at least a baptized Christian.

Orthodox Andrew
14th February 2004, 02:15 AM
That's right, one must be Orthodox, but if the other is not Orthodox, he or she must be at least a baptized Christian.
When did this start being practiced? When my Aunt tried to get married to a Protestant in the Greek Orthodox Church, the Priest said he must convert or no marriage in the Church.

MariaRegina
14th February 2004, 02:17 AM
It's seen as preferable (and personally I can't imagine being married to someone who wasn't Orthodox, I don't think I could live like that), but it is not required.

Still, I keep my sights set on nice Orthodox boys. I have had an evangelical "Christian" boy dump me about a year ago because he knew I was going to become Orthodox (I was a catechumen at the time) and he 'didn't know' whether we 'believed in the same Christ' or not. :rolleyes:

And after the way I got to, um, know him, I'd say DEFINITELY NOT.

So anyway, that's why I stay the hell away from the Campus Crusaders, and I scope out the single guys at OCF every week. ;)

Dear Matrona:

I went to a Christian gathering and sat at the only table left -- with 7 handsome guys and I was the only gal. Fun times. That is where I met my husband. Funny thing -- all the girls sat with girls and all the other guys sat with the guys. I didn't come to the party to meet other girls -- I wanted a husband. So I found him.
:D

Love in Christ,
Elizabeth

Matrona
14th February 2004, 02:17 AM
When did this start being practiced? When my Aunt tried to get married to a Protestant in the Greek Orthodox Church, the Priest said he must convert or no marriage in the Church.
Some things like this are "YMMV".

Orthodox Andrew
14th February 2004, 02:19 AM
Some things like this are "YMMV".
So true.

Matrona
14th February 2004, 02:22 AM
I wanted a husband. So I found him.
LOL!!! :D

I need an Orthodox boy and fast. I think I mentioned this in the Taverna, that the only other people at my church who are my age are engaged to each other.

/me is loooonely!

Suzannah
14th February 2004, 01:48 PM
It's seen as preferable (and personally I can't imagine being married to someone who wasn't Orthodox, I don't think I could live like that), but it is not required.

Still, I keep my sights set on nice Orthodox boys. I have had an evangelical "Christian" boy dump me about a year ago because he knew I was going to become Orthodox (I was a catechumen at the time) and he 'didn't know' whether we 'believed in the same Christ' or not. :rolleyes:

And after the way I got to, um, know him, I'd say DEFINITELY NOT.

So anyway, that's why I stay the hell away from the Campus Crusaders, and I scope out the single guys at OCF every week. ;)
Matrona,
You're such a pretty girl and so charming, I cannot imagine you having all this trouble. What's wrong with the boys at your school???? :scratch:

Re: that "Christian" boy : what a git. :rolleyes:

As for Campus Crusade: I don't blame you. I've been witness to many of their shenanigans over the years. Remind them of the reasons P. Gillquist left ! LOL!!! My friend Katie is Catholic. Her daughters are attending schools out of state. One of them called in tears a few months ago to say that she had been to a CC party and that a good many young folks, along with their "leader", had sort of ganged up on her, and told her she wasn't really "saved" and that she was going to hell because she was a Mary worshipper, blah, blah, blah....She was so very upset. At the time, I was still a dyed in the wool Baptist, so I felt eminently qualified to ring them up and read them the Riot Act. So I did, and she received several phone calls and apologies from that group, but she never went back....