Soul Mates?

[Grand_Duchess-Elizaveta]

Do y'all believe in such a thing as soul mates? Basically, what I mean by that is do you believe God has a special person chosen for you, or do you just meet the right person by chance? I have a hard time explaining it, but I tend to think it's both.

This is open for both singles and marrieds to comment on. Actually, I am curious to find out what you married folks believe. Was yours a match made in heaven, or a matter of chance (just happened to be at the right place at the right time, nothing Divine involved)?

Thanks for indulging me.:)

[Grand_Duchess-Elizaveta]

Ah, come on. No one else has ever thought about this?

[Michael the Iconographer]

I have many thoughts on this and other things which have been said lately, but unfortunately because of a person who has been trolling this board and has been out to condemn me for everything I say, I have kept myself from giving my point of view on a number of issues. I am sorry.

[MaRiNa_Orthodox]

Welll I'll reply;)

I talked to my parents about this and they told me that it was kinda by chance that my parents met but they are sure it was God's wish, I mean God wanted to put them together because they are soulmates. Now how they met was funny and looked kinda weird but oh well it turned out to be a marrige. Let me tell you just one thing, they WERE NOT looking like a soulmates in the beggining of their marriage(I still remember lots and lots of fights...) but as the time passed they got better and better;) anyways I g2g see yazz later:)

[feo]

I dont believe everyone has a soulmate. I believe God intends for some to remain single.

Dont think you're s'pose to be single? Just keep in mind that love is BLIND.

It will be nice- to be in a place; where none of it matters.

[Grand_Duchess-Elizaveta]

I dont believe everyone has a soulmate. I believe God intends for some to remain single.

Dont think you're s'pose to be single? Just keep in mind that love is BLIND.

It will be nice- to be in a place; where none of it matters.
Well, I understood your first 2 sentences, but after that you lost me.

Michael, I'm so sorry about your situation. I don't know any details, but I can certainly fancy a few guesses as to what's going on in your life right now. I wish the troller could be banned so that you would at least have this place to share you opinions or vent about life in general. I pray for you nightly.:hug:

Thanks for sharing, Marina.:) For me, I don't think it is an either or situation. I think that God loves us and wants what (or who) is best for us, right? And if we trust Him, He will help us choose the best person for us. But, I have heard married couples say that they truly felt God created one just for the other. That's very romantic and sweet, but true? I don't know.

[DeusAmante]

Do y'all believe in such a thing as soul mates? Basically, what I mean by that is do you believe God has a special person chosen for you, or do you just meet the right person by chance? I have a hard time explaining it, but I tend to think it's both.

This is open for both singles and marrieds to comment on. Actually, I am curious to find out what you married folks believe. Was yours a match made in heaven, or a matter of chance (just happened to be at the right place at the right time, nothing Divine involved)?

Thanks for indulging me.:)
I think the Lord will give you the deepest desires of your heart...but I also think if you are committed to Him you want His will for your life. So, if He wants you to be "married" or "single" he can use you in any scenario you are in. Ack, I'm kind of off the subject--and question. I DO believe the Lord has a person out there for each person...(of course excluding people the Lord will's to be single). If God is all knowing, how could He not? God is not a god of chance. He knows everything and that's what's so cool about depending on HIM...because we know He knows the big picture and if we just give it to Him how much more will be accomplished! So, luck or chance definitely does NOT fall into God's category!

In His Grip,
Hannah :holy:

[aesthetic]

Both, my wife and I consider ourselves to be but in this sense, as Paul writes..."the two shall become one flesh, this is a great mystery..."

We consider ourselves blessed to have each other, so in that way, it was the Lord's doing. Also remeber it is written, ..."what God has joined together..."

[Moros]

Nope.

[feo]

Well, I understood your first 2 sentences, but after that you lost me.

I was referring to heaven.

[Constantine]

I really don't know where I stand on this issue, I guess it's just really up to God :P

[Grand_Duchess-Elizaveta]

Thanks for the responses so far. I hope more people make comments!

Feo, I sort of understood the reference to heaven. I just couldn't figure out how the reference to "love is blind" fit it.

Brunkvic, are you saying it is merely chance or coinicidence? Or that God just leaves it up to us to either choose someone or not? Just wanted clarification. One word replies are maddening to me.:D

Here's something y'all can comment on if you like. Years ago, when I was still entrenched in the charasmatic non-denominational movement, I had a "prophet" give a prophesy to me. He was a guest speaker at the church I was at, so I didn't know him from Adam. During the service he called me forward and prophesied about the man I would marry. He also told me the things that were going on in my mind and heart at the time, things NO ONE could've known about. He was dead accurate. About a year or two later, I was visiting another church, and didn't know a soul there. After the service, the pastor and one of the congregates came to me because the man had recieved a "word of knowledge", aka prophesy, about......you guessed, the man I would marry. Isn't that wild? For all that guy knew, I could've already been married. He didn't know anything about me. What do you guys make of this?

[Orthosdoxa]

I would be very careful about that kind of stuff. The evil one has powers, too, and quite frankly, that's where I think a lot of this "word of knowledge" stuff comes from.

I really don't know where I stand on this. I firmly believe that God does NOT micromanage our lives, and set the "right" things in front of us that we are "supposed" to have or to do. Yet, He blesses us with good things far beyond our comprehension. My husband and I complement each other so well and he is such a blessing to me, yet I don't feel that God made the "choice" for me. The synergy between man's free will and God's sovereignty has been the subject of debates since time immemorial. I guess my opinion is that it is a holy mystery, like everything else.

LK

[Grand_Duchess-Elizaveta]

I would be very careful about that kind of stuff. The evil one has powers, too, and quite frankly, that's where I think a lot of this "word of knowledge" stuff comes from.

LKI suppose that is a topic for another thread! I understand what you're saying. At the time these "prophesies" came was during a couple of very low points in my life. I was crying out to God for some sort of .........something, to let me know that God was hearing the cry of my heart. It is hard to put it in words, and I couldn't begin to explain everything that was going on in my life at that time. The "prophesies" are what convinced me that God was indeed hearing my prayers and responding to them. I don't know what would've happened to me had I not gotten them. I think it was first time I ever felt like God acknowledged my existance.

Anyway, back to the OP.......I give myself a headache thinking about this. I have a hard time grasping how God's omniscience relates to our free will. God doesn't choose this or that for us, but He already knows who or what we will choose...........I think we can definitely see within the life of the Church that certain people were chosen by God to do this or that. The Theotokos, for example. I don't believe that Gabriel was roaming the coutryside in the greater Bethlehem area in search of any pious virgin. She had free will to reject the Annunciation, but she chose not to. I think Elizabeth was chosen to bare St. John the Forerunner as well. I know those 2 examples are different from the "soul mate" thing, but the principle of God choosing people for this or that is relevant (I think).

Isn't there also a story about St. Raphael bringing two people together? And St. Xenia (Fool For Christ) brought together a couple as well, using her gift of clairvoyance. I dunno...........just thinking out loud.:)

[Niko]

If we believe in free will, how can we have soul mates?

[Grand_Duchess-Elizaveta]

If we believe in free will, how can we have soul mates?
I actually don't like the term "soul mate." It seems too new-agey. The term "best one for me" works better. I don't know what I believe. Well, I'm pretty sure I'm not "called" to stay single forever, at least I hope not! :eek:

Hey, is anybody chosen to do anything? I'm talking on an individual level. Some say the are "called" into priesthood, etc.

[aesthetic]

I actually don't like the term "soul mate." It seems too new-agey. The term "best one for me" works better. I don't know what I believe. Well, I'm pretty sure I'm not "called" to stay single forever, at least I hope not! :eek:

Hey, is anybody chosen to do anything? I'm talking on an individual level. Some say the are "called" into priesthood, etc. I'm kind of new to orthodox doctrine, but I believe that free will has more to do with choosing or rejecting the grace of God. We do not choose our parents, or country, or time of birth. The entire lineage of Christ was by the providence of God.

All I know is that with my wife and me, it was the proverbial "love at first sight", no doubt about it. However, we did strugle a little until we devoted ourselves to Christ. And I mean completely put our faith in Him, not just lip service. Now we are closer than we have ever been.

I also know that this(love at first sight) was the case with my sister, my parents, my mother's parents.

As for the second part of your question; I view my life as not a daily choosing, but as a series of opportunities, where I have chosen wisely, or foolishly.

Keep praying to God for an husband, just be careful for what you wish for. :D

[Niko]

Hey, is anybody chosen to do anything

Im referring to the fact that by what your saying about soul mates seems to create the image that if God has made someone for us out there, we HAVE to be with them. Im thinking about the preisthood and if there is someone out there for me and I decide to become a Bishop, who or what do I choose? Which oppurtunity yields the greater fruits? If they are both good choices, how do i know if im rejecting God's grace or not?

[Mother Vashti]

If we believe in free will, how can we have soul mates? But Jesus himself said a man and woman cleaved as one flesh is something that God has brought together, and no man can put it asunder.

I think each human being burns internally for a mate, at some point in their lives. This condition is something else entirely from free will, and shouldn't be treated as a free will issue.

Anyway, I just came to this thread to ask "What if your soulmate isn't Orthodox?", but since most of you do not believe in soulmates I guess it's moot.

[Grand_Duchess-Elizaveta]

Im referring to the fact that by what your saying about soul mates seems to create the image that if God has made someone for us out there, we HAVE to be with them. Im thinking about the preisthood and if there is someone out there for me and I decide to become a Bishop, who or what do I choose? Which oppurtunity yields the greater fruits? If they are both good choices, how do i know if im rejecting God's grace or not?
I don't know how to answer your first comment. I only know that God doesn't force us to choose one thing or another. I do believe that He can lead us to the best choice for us (whether it be a mate, or whatever). I've never been able to accept the idea that all things are random, and that God sits on the outside and lets whatever happen, happen. Maybe this is just idealism left over from my protestant days. I consider marriage to be a very important thing (obviously, it's a sacrament), and I would hate to think that God would have nothing to do with bringing the two people together.

[Dust and Ashes]

I don't really believe in soul-mates or love at 1st sight, thought I wouldn't argue the point. I believe love is as much about choice as chance. I wasn't "in love with" my wife when we married but I did love her and I made the choice to commit to spend the rest of my life with her. I grow to love her more and better every day we are together and I can't imagine my life without her.

I know that doesn't sound terribly romantic so I'll tell you the part of the story that tends to redeem it. ;) I had popped from one bad relationship to another and finally I made a vow to God that no matter what happened and if I spent the rest of my life alone, I would never place anyone in a position in my life that was above Him. Within a week, my wife asked me out and we were married a little less than a year later.

[Mother Vashti]

You guys are kinda cynical, gosh :(

[Grand_Duchess-Elizaveta]

You guys are kinda cynical, gosh :(
Perhaps.......but let me give you an example of why it may be dangerous to think there is just one special person for you. I know a lady who has been married 5 times (so far). Each time she falls for a guy, she is convinced that this guy is "the one." Well, prince charming turns into a jerk, so she decides "Well, this guy obviously can't really be 'the one'...", so she dumps him (divorces him) and tries again with another guy. This sounds wacky, but it is a true situation of someone I know. And, I don't know how many times I've heard a divorced person say "I should've known [insert any name] wasn't the right one for me.", and then they continue their search for someone who is the right one. I have a little announcement to make........IF YOU HAVE A RING ON YOUR FINGER, WHOEVER YOU'RE WITH *IS* "THE ONE"! Can you see how "the one" could lead to a never-ending quest for the ideal person?

[Mother Vashti]

Can you see how "the one" could lead to a never-ending quest for the ideal person? I suppose.

[aesthetic]

....IF YOU HAVE A RING ON YOUR FINGER, WHOEVER YOU'RE WITH *IS* "THE ONE"! Can you see how "the one" could lead to a never-ending quest for the ideal person?
Yes, but not all cases but in many, divorce is the product of selfishness. At the begining both are ussually more patient, and think of the other before themselves, at least in a normal relationship. But as time wears on, if the two do not remain in that mindset, or at least call it to mind, then....

[Grand_Duchess-Elizaveta]

Yes, but not all cases but in many, divorce is the product of selfishness. At the begining both are ussually more patient, and think of the other before themselves, at least in a normal relationship. But as time wears on, if the two do not remain in that mindset, or at least call it to mind, then....
I agree completely.:) Not that I know much on a personal level about divorce (never been married), but I certainly know a lot of people who have been divorced. Things like adultery and failure to communicate with each other are very selfish. But then again, isn't all sin self-centered? The very first sin demonstates this; we think we know better than God, or that our way must be the better way. Whoops......back to the OP..........:) I'm still a little torn on this issue. I could play devil's advocate for either side.