Sex before, with or after marriage?

[Waterhouse]

Great, now we're 'encouraging' youth that it is 'okay' to have sex outside of marriage? What a joke. I'm heartened that we have youth with good values and morals, who are willing to speak up about it.

[JillLars]

:scratch: who's encouraging youth to have sex outside of marriage?

[Neenie]

I don't think there's any need to insult Joshua because of his age. He has his opinions, and he has backed them up, showing he has put at least some critical thought into his decision about sex before marriage. Do I agree with him? No, but that doesn't give me the right to disregard his post because of his age.

I have no problem with his opinion on this issue jillars, but he did sound rather insulting at the start.

Quote.I can't believe that any "Christian" would even DARE to think that such an immoral thing as this is OK!!!!!!! America and the world is going to hell because of people like you, who are perverted in mind and heart! Quote.

[Neenie]

Great, now we're 'encouraging' youth that it is 'okay' to have sex outside of marriage? What a joke. I'm heartened that we have youth with good values and morals, who are willing to speak up about it.

No one on this thread is encouraging youth to have sex :sigh:

[Timo]

I don't think there's any need to insult Joshua because of his age. He has his opinions, and he has backed them up, showing he has put at least some critical thought into his decision about sex before marriage. Do I agree with him? No, but that doesn't give me the right to disregard his post because of his age.

It is fair enough for him to have his opinions, but condeming us to hell seems a 'little' extreme, particularly if he's not going to read the posts where we outline why we believe what we believe (or if he has, do nothing to show why we are wrong other than to assert that his interpretation of the Bible is right).

I can't believe that any "Christian" would even DARE to think that such an immoral thing as this is OK!!!!!!! America and the world is going to hell because of people like you, who are perverted in mind and heart! I'll lay out briefly a Biblical point regarding this:

I'll begin by making it clear that ADULTERY is sexual unfairness within the boundry of marriage, while FORNICATION is non-marital sexual activity.

[Timo]

Great, now we're 'encouraging' youth that it is 'okay' to have sex outside of marriage?
No, we're expressing our opinions and giving reasons for our opinions. We're not telling the youth that it is 'okay', or saying it is, or 'encouraging' them that it is (I'm not even sure if that even makes any sense as a sentance).

[hischildsindik]

Although I agree with you in large part, I think a key point for Christians who believe premarital sex is okay, is that we're not talking about sex without committment. We're talking about viewing sex as if it *is* a committment - one that is going to be followed up by marriage. Although I'm still not sure if having sex with someone you subsequently marry (and having sex KNOWING that you committed to marying that person) is a sin, it certainly IS a sin to have a number of sexual partners, and then justify it by saying, "Oh we were dating. I wasn't sleeping around."


Even being commited and engaged to marry does not make it okay for sex, in my opinion. It is still sex outside of the context it was created. For there is no full assurance that the marriage will happen. Although we have to remember God's abundant grace and love. For the actions we choose, there will be consequences. Sex outside of God's plan does lead to consequences that can be hard to bare. Repentance and forgivenesss can bring healing, although not forfeiting the consequences in many cases, it does lift a huge burdon.

[Shamash Of Yeshua]

What? This is coming a 15 year old kid? Now go and play with your playstation! or read whole thread!


Forgive him farther, for he knows not what he is talking about. :prayer:
Let me think a minute about this... Hmmm didn't Yeshua HaMashiach say that we should be as LITTLE CHILDREN?


Mat 18:1-7 HNV In that hour the talmidim came to Yeshua, saying, "Who then is greatest in the Kingdom of Heaven?" (2) Yeshua called a little child to himself, and set him in the midst of them, (3) and said, "Most certainly I tell you, unless you turn, and become as little children, you will in no way enter into the Kingdom of Heaven. (4) Whoever therefore humbles himself as this little child, the same is the greatest in the Kingdom of Heaven. (5) Whoever receives one such little child in my name receives me, (6) but whoever causes one of these little ones who believe in me to stumble, it would be better for him that a huge millstone should be hung around his neck, and that he should be sunk in the depths of the sea. (7) "Woe to the world because of occasions of stumbling! For it must be that the occasions come, but woe to that person through whom the occasion comes!


Forgive the Ignorance of Adults who can't see the Truth when a Child speaks the WORD OF YHWH.
I would have to say a Child ,who after studying the WORD of YHWH knows better then most Adults.

Shalom,

Tag

[TedMorgan3]

The answer is probably no—pause—yes and in that order. We seem irresponsible about our relationships. We hurt each other. We have sex without taking precautions not to have children we cannot support. We expose each other to diseases.

It seems better to restrict sexual intercourse and many other forms of sexual play to marriage. That means we have to set an example.

After my divorce almost twelve years ago, I have remaind celibate. The woman whom I love feels the same as I that we do not want to have sex outside marriage. In my case antidepressant mediation once made that an easy choice. The question is whether we ought to remarry.

It would be hard for me to argue that my long marriage never functioned as a true marriage.

[TheFirstNoelle]

Let me think a minute about this... Hmmm didn't Yeshua HaMashiach say that we should be as LITTLE CHILDREN?


Forgive the Ignorance of Adults who can't see the Truth when a Child speaks the WORD OF YHWH.
I would have to say a Child ,who after studying the WORD of YHWH knows better then most Adults.

Shalom,

Tag
But Scripture also tells us to thirst after spiritual maturity and long for sustenance beyond the spiritual milk we begin our faith lives with - I don't think that an honest examination and interpretation of scripture on the part of an adult who has been a Christian for many years, is anything to condemn.

While Jesus calls us all to a childlike openness and honesty, he also tells us to strive after spiritual maturity and be as shrewd as serpents. It's a balance. When you are a younger Christian (younger in Christ-years as well as physical years), issues often seem much more simple, and black and white - I know that was the case with me (and I'm still relatively young!). That doesn't necessarily mean that that's the "correct" view of the issue. Just because some Christians have a different perspective on sex (and, I may add, a perspective that cannot be *automatically* discounted by Scripture, ie it's not a viewpoint that promotes something very specifically anti-Biblical like promiscuity) does not mean that they have lost the innocence and truth of their original "child like" views, or that they're making excuses and becoming jaded. In my questioning of this issue, I have been very, very careful, and have tried to remain in close contact with God, listening to what he has to say. I think that as we grow in the faith, it's important to question the assumptions we've held; I know that for me, when I was younger, I always believed all premarital sex (or anything beyond kissing really) was completely wrong, all the time, as well as unwise. I still maintain that it's often unwise, but as I've said, I now wonder about the sin part. In re-examining my assumptions through a detailed study of Scripture, I have found some support, and some not-so-much support. It's been interesting for me. But in the meantime - I must add again that abstinence is the best choice!

TedMorgan - thank you for your interesting perspective! :wave:

[Neenie]

Let me think a minute about this... Hmmm didn't Yeshua HaMashiach say that we should be as LITTLE CHILDREN?


Forgive the Ignorance of Adults who can't see the Truth when a Child speaks the WORD OF YHWH.
I would have to say a Child ,who after studying the WORD of YHWH knows better then most Adults.

Shalom,
Tag


OK as I stated above, I had no problem with him stating his opinion, when I quoted him I quoted the FIRST paragraph which I found to be childish, not true, condemning and not the word of God. which is why I called him a kid. I had NO problem with the rest of his post which seemed fair enough and mature, which is why I left it out of the bit when I quoted him.
I hope you understand. :sigh:

[JillLars]

Even being commited and engaged to marry does not make it okay for sex, in my opinion. It is still sex outside of the context it was created. For there is no full assurance that the marriage will happen.

What is the context in which sex was created? Did adam and eve have a marriage ceremony? No, they became one and stayed that way. If two people join themselves together through sex, and then seperate (before or after the marriage ceremony) God will hold them accountable for that. It is my opinion that marriage has happened if two people sleep together, even if they fail to recognize that.

[Neenie]

What is the context in which sex was created? Did adam and eve have a marriage ceremony? No, they became one and stayed that way. If two people join themselves together through sex, and then seperate (before or after the marriage ceremony) God will hold them accountable for that. It is my opinion that marriage has happened if two people sleep together, even if they fail to recognize that.

Hi jillars I used to think the same thing, however I’m a bit confused because it say's we are to follow the laws of the land and need a certificate, someone stated in post 166.
But no where does it say sex with the person you are going to marry is sin. In the sexual laws of Leviticus 18 it say's we are not to have sex with Married people, Animals, Family members, prostitutes and never says anything on pre-marital sex. Many conservatives claim the term "fornication" is pre-marital sex, but the root of the word comes from the Greek word "pornea" which was the temple prostitutes. Some Christians also claim "fornication" means anything to do with sexual thoughts including "masturbation" So there is allot of meanings thrown around, and just plain unrealistic. It also says in Corinthians 1 16Do you not know that he who unites himself with a prostitute is one with her in body? For it is said, "The two will become one flesh. Sounds pretty straight forward to me.

It's okay if people want to think that premarital sex is not good. However, there is not biblical justification to believe that all premarital sex is bad.

[JillLars]

I agree 100% Janine, I think the bible warns against joining your body with a prostitute because we're only supposed to be joined with one person, and what are the chances of fulfilling the marriage requirements with a prostitute? (not likely) I think that the bible speaks very clearly about casual sex in that respect, so people who aren't legally married but are having sex are joined together just the same in God's eyes, so they have a responsibility to fulfill the requirements that go along with that.

[BabbleOn8806]

:(

[Newsboy1900]

Well i go by the bible it says its a sin so i have held that for going on 20 years yay ya its hard but worth it -_-

Also
Hehe :) I believe that sex between two people who are committed to getting married is a grey area. I don't think that by believing this, I am "rewriting" the Bible - I think it's genuinely unclear, esp when you take into account the Old Testament passage saying that two people who sleep together have to get married (they're not stoned or anything - see Timo's posts)

However, because it's grey its safer and wiser to wait, and not take chances. I'm just not sure about whether it's sin or not; I tend to lean more towards not, because I think the point of Biblical sexual ethics is that sex comes with a lifetime committment, and if you're going to have sex that should be considered as committing yourself to that person for life. But again, it's best to wait for marriage for a myriad of reasons, one being that you don't want to have regrets if you break up with that person that would be equivalent to divorce, in my mind), and you don't want to make fellow Christians stumble by your behavior.

Anyway, that's my perspective. Lots of people say it's wrong because God says so/the Bible s clear on it, etc, but I have been a strong Christian my whole life, and I've done quite a bit of study on this issue, and I think it needs to be addressed more fully than it is. Not necessarily in order to defend premarital sex, but to base arguments for abstinence on a stronger foundaiton - both spiritually and secularly (danger of STDs, pregnancy, heartbreak, etc). Hope that makes it more clear, and that I haven't offended you! :wave:


I saw the part of this Hehe :) I believe that sex between two people who are committed to getting married is a grey area.

i would have to dissagree i mean how many people in the world say they are getting married and it never happens -_-

sorry if i had typos im half asleep -_-

[Newsboy1900]

also i would like to add that im very impressed on the people under 20 that is sticking up for not having sex till married

[JillLars]

I saw the part of this Hehe :) I believe that sex between two people who are committed to getting married is a grey area.

i would have to dissagree i mean how many people in the world say they are getting married and it never happens -_-

How many people get married and say its forever but then get a divorce. Believe it or not there are people in this world who can keep their promises, married and unmarried.

[Oli]

Captain,

"Biblical" arguments against sex before marriage rarely consider the examples of bigamy and use of concubines in the Bible. The common argument was that this was ok because it was cultural - precisely the argument which they do not allow in the modern setting.

Wake up and smell the cheese people - "because it's in the bible" is a lame reason.

Oli

[lady in waiting]

In mid Feb I am starting a bible study for the middle school girls at my church and this is what it is dealing with. I truly belive that God wants you to wait till you are married to have sex. So many ppl say it is going to be forever and they are engaed(sp) so that makes it ok. Then mabey they do mabey they dont but if they dont where does that leave them. I believe that sex is best left to marriage.^_^ :kiss:

[JillLars]

In mid Feb I am starting a bible study for the middle school girls at my church and this is what it is dealing with. I truly belive that God wants you to wait till you are married to have sex. So many ppl say it is going to be forever and they are engaed(sp) so that makes it ok. Then mabey they do mabey they dont but if they dont where does that leave them. I believe that sex is best left to marriage

I think its great that you are going to be teaching middle school girls! I encourage you to tell them to wait until marriage. The reason why I say this is because I can remember friends in highschool thinking they would marry their boyfriend, and then sleeping with them. Unfortunately, being 15 and saying that is a little different than being 20 and saying it, and planning a wedding. I don't think middle/high school kids are ready to make that type of committment, so when they say it, they don't mean it. Unfortunately a lot of people in their 20's don't mean it either, and even more unfortunately a lot of people who get married don't mean it. Here's what I would tell your girls if they are thinking of having sex (and this is coming from someone who doesn't hold a "traditional" view on the subject.) The bible instructs us to only be with one person, we are not to join ourselves to prostitutes (or anyone you're not going to marry) because when you have sex with someone, there are obligations that go along with that, including getting married, and taking care of one another for life. Ask these girls how they will handle those expectations when they share themselves with others. God holds us accountable for the promises we make, and to steal a line from a movie, even if you don't make a promise, your body does. Just some food for thought.

[Oli]

Me too...but saying that sex is best within marriage "because the bible says so" is just shallow thinking.

Oli

[Newsboy1900]

so if someone dont murder someone and there :scratch: reason is because the bible says so thats shallow to :/

[JillLars]

so if someone dont murder someone and there :scratch: reason is because the bible says so thats shallow to

If that's the best reason you can come up with, then yes. All Oli is asking is that people use a little critical thinking. The sex before marriage argument can't really be compared with murder because it isn't specifically spelled out for us in the 10 commandments. While some people, believe sex before marriage is very clearly wrong according to the bible, others are not so sure. So, saying "the bible says so" isn't such a great argument because we're all reading the same bible, yet we're not agreeing. That isn't to say that sex isn't best in marriage for practical reasons, such as avoiding unwanted pregnancy, and std's.

[Newsboy1900]

all sin is equal i try to look at the small things the same as big things it holds more effect because if i think of the sins i do as that bad it helps me work harder not to fall agian and do it

[Joshua Howard]

Earlier in this thread, I note that a number of individuals attempted to belittle me for my stance regarding this matter. In brief, You can have any opinion you wish... However, if your opinion goes against Biblical truth, you really can't say that you are a Christ-Follower. Ye Cannot Serve Both God and Mammon.

As for the emphatic tone in my past post, This is a black and white issue, and it is a disgusting argument. To all those openly opposing me, if you have any fear of God whatsoever, it is you who should be the ones glowering with shame. I write this post to affirm that I take nothing back that I said. Christ was angry, yet without sin, and so am I.

[white dove]

Hmmm...I seemed to have already covered this topic in the "oral sex" forum, so..but long story short: no, it isn't what God intends for us. God would love for us not to get hurt, indulge in sexual acts that could lead to MORE sexual acts, but would rather we remain pure for His sake~if we are to get married, our bodies are a blessing to our husband or wife; not for: Alex, Steven, Andrew...Phil, Josh...oh yeah, that guy at the football game..um, his best friend..uh..who else??
Whoever mentioned our bodies are a temple hit it right on~"create in me a pure heart, Oh God"
We are no longer slaves to our bodies but children of God~are you a slave or an heir to the throne of God??

hugs n' prayers

[Roman Soldier]

Comments removed.

[Roman Soldier]

I'm going to hope that there are so many 'no' votes only because this is a Christian website attracting Biblical literalists, and that a poll of the general population would not yield similar results as this one.

[Neenie]

Earlier in this thread, I note that a number of individuals attempted to belittle me for my stance regarding this matter. In brief, You can have any opinion you wish... However, if your opinion goes against Biblical truth, you really can't say that you are a Christ-Follower. Ye Cannot Serve Both God and Mammon.

As for the emphatic tone in my past post, This is a black and white issue, and it is a disgusting argument. To all those openly opposing me, if you have any fear of God whatsoever, it is you who should be the ones glowering with shame. I write this post to affirm that I take nothing back that I said. Christ was angry, yet without sin, and so am I.

Well People need to do their research back to when the scripture's were first written, and you get back to the Greek translations of words such as porneia. It's very sad that people have twisted the bible to their religious idea's then condemn and judge those who understand the truth of the bible that not all pre-marital sex is sin. Fornication is where people had sex with prostitutes in the alleys and L shaped walls called "fornix" at the Temple of Aphrodite and around Rome. Sex with those prostitutes was idolatrous!! This is what Paul was talking about.
There is nothing in the Bible that condemns sex that is in a loving relationship of a couple who are getting married, nothing! It’s OK if people don’t believe that, but don’t condemn others with hatred, :)

I also add that pre-marital sex is something that you have to be very mature about, and it's best keeping it to latter age, when you plan on marriage. It can be very easy to make mistakes.

[Jenniflower]

me and my fiance are both committed christians. he was going to stop it between us but we didnt, as we're getting married we dont see it to be wrong.

[Gslayer]

It is absolutely not ok to have sex outside of Marriage. God created sex as a wedding gift to a couple so why should we defile that gift?

[YLOHYLOH]

If we say we are a christian we should not be involved in sex before marriage. Jesus said in Matthew that those that choose to commit adultry and fornication will not enter heaven unless they repent of those sins and quit doing them. If you are involved in this sin please ask the Lord to forgive you and either marry the one you are involved with or quit have sex until you are married. Remember it is not what I think or you think, it is what the word of God says! God's love can remove guilt and remorse so that you can be on the right road which lead to eternal life and Heaven.
ylohyloh

[TinyMe029]

I am 15 years old and im not a virgin and right as of now i regret no waiting i see how much it means to a guy for a girl to save herself for when him and her are married. :cry: can u give me advice!

shea

[Mistyfogg]

I think people make too big of a deal out of it. I was not a virgin when I got married. I was not a virgin before I met my future husband either. My husband was a virgin before he met me. We had sex together before marriage. Our wedding night was still very special. I wish I had saved myself for him, but I DO NOT regret us having sex before we were married because our love was so strong and we knew from the beginning that we would be married. I think in the end, it does not matter that much, people think about it and put too much stock in it. It honestly would not have made a difference to us. A real man will love you for you are, not whther you are "pure" or not:)

[taedium]

I don't think a marriage means anything special unless both partners enter the relationship as virgins. It's probably best to still wait until marriage in the relationship since marriage for most really is the point of commitment since a marriage is so much more difficult to break than an engagement.

[JillLars]

I don't think a marriage means anything special unless both partners enter the relationship as virgins

Believe it or not, when most people decide to get married, it means a lot to them, virgin or not. I don't think its fair to belittle other people's relationships by assuming it means less to them because they didn't lose their virginity on their wedding night. (taedium, I'm not saying you are doing this, but a lot of people do).

[ChristsChick]

Sex before marriage is totally wrong, it says in the Bible to stay pure until marriage. I've done a few things I'm not proud of in that respect, but I'm very pleased to say I've remained a virgin, because I think although marriage is special anyway, it will mean so much more to me to share sex only with my husband. Also, think how you would feel, knowing you're future husband/wife is out there now sleeping around?

And people who argue that they're getting married anyway, in that case, why can't you wait. If you are sure this is the person you will spend the rest of your life with then what's the rush? Things can change really quickly in relationships, and if we give ourselves away too soon we'll only end up hurt.

I for one aren't going to have sex until I've got a wedding ring on my finger, because that's what God created sex for, and I don't think it should happen in any other circumstance!

[Icystwolf]

There is one and only one reason that I may marry a non-virgin, and thats if and only if, they regret it and they humble themselves before God.

Any reason outside that, like "I love you" or " You're always in my heart" kind of jargon won't work.

Everyone has lust, everyone wants to get laid everynight with someone sexy....holding it means that you're strong to go against your desires.

If I had a choice, between two Christians, one a virgin and the other a non-virgin, I would pick the virgin. I see that as being very important, and so do other Christians. If you throw that away, then it's almost like throwing away half your soul.....

thats my opinion.

[JillLars]

I for one aren't going to have sex until I've got a wedding ring on my finger, because that's what God created sex for, and I don't think it should happen in any other circumstance!

Good for you.

If I had a choice, between two Christians, one a virgin and the other a non-virgin, I would pick the virgin. I see that as being very important, and so do other Christians. If you throw that away, then it's almost like throwing away half your soul.....
So, lets change this up a little bit, you have a choice between a Christian-virgin who you aren't so compatible with, or a Christian-non-virgin who you have everything in common with and get along great with? Will you reject the latter and favor the first because of the status of their hymen?

[Icystwolf]

So, lets change this up a little bit, you have a choice between a Christian-virgin who you aren't so compatible with, or a Christian-non-virgin who you have everything in common with and get along great with? Will you reject the latter and favor the first because of the status of their hymen?
Would I be called ignorant if I disagreed?

1. My stance still stands. Virginity is by far an important issue for myself.
2. My philosophy of choosing a girl is not compatibility. It's strategic. Why? Because nearly all engineers are trained to be logical, nearly all military personel are trained to follow orders...compatibility in that sense means I need to find a person whom has more commonalities. I would not choose a female engineer as a wife as my first preference. I would choose maybe a doctor, economist, maths....etc

3. The only commonality I'm interested is whether they love God or not. I will not date non-Christians... I love God because God has done so much for me, saved me several times...I cannot let go of God because of one woman.

4. I don't take risks, hence compatibility isn't an issue, strategically more variance in the parents will produce better children who has a greater range in knowledge based on two different intellects knowledge passed on.

5. I want to care about the person I'm with. Compatibility means it's almost automatically expected. Strategically means I need to take steps and plan for it. To understand the person that I care for, and to know her so well, and make the marriage work so it's inseperable.

[JillLars]

:sigh:

When I said compatible, I didn't mean you had to be exactly alike. Let me try this again.

Girl 1: Sparks are flying, she's a Christian, you love everything about her, but she's not a virgin.
Girl 2: Lukewarm feelings, she's a Christian, you love some things about her, she is a virgin.

Surely you have experienced different feelings with different girls. I was just asking if virginity would be the determining factor if the circumstances were as mentioned above. Marrying a woman who isn't a virgin doesn't mean you have to forsake God. So, hopefully my question makes a little more sense now.

[Icystwolf]

:sigh:

When I said compatible, I didn't mean you had to be exactly alike. Let me try this again.

Girl 1: Sparks are flying, she's a Christian, you love everything about her, but she's not a virgin.
Girl 2: Lukewarm feelings, she's a Christian, you love some things about her, she is a virgin.

Surely you have experienced different feelings with different girls. I was just asking if virginity would be the determining factor if the circumstances were as mentioned above. Marrying a woman who isn't a virgin doesn't mean you have to forsake God. So, hopefully my question makes a little more sense now.
When I said that virginity was a very important issue for me, I thought I was hinting a suggestion that not only sparks but fireworks will go off for me...lol....

I suppose theres some mis-interpertation from my part.

I know theres probably a culture, but the main reason is kinda like ownership. If I marry a non-virgin, I know that someone out there who had sex with my wife before we got married, could one day come up to me and say, Hey I screwed your wife 20yrs ago and it was good....It's a gap that scares me sometimes.

[JillLars]

I agree that gap would be a scary situation. I believe we should only sleep with one person (married or unmarried) much for reasons like your's and also for safety reasons. I'm very glad I have only slept with one person, and he's the person I'm marrying (and vice versa).

[Icystwolf]

I agree that gap would be a scary situation. I believe we should only sleep with one person (married or unmarried) much for reasons like your's and also for safety reasons. I'm very glad I have only slept with one person, and he's the person I'm marrying (and vice versa).You should be happy, that thats the only person you'll ever sleep with.

I feel poor for the innocent spouses that contracted AIDS from cheating partners....thats the danger....

[GraceReborn]

I believe it is a sin. Have I? Yes. Am I a sinner? Yes... we all are. Do I think it is OK? There is only ONE judge of us and it is HIM. I believe it takes a special person to wait till after they are married to have sex. And I applaud all who have. I sometimes wish that I had waited... at least until I trully understood the decision I was making. I leave it in God's capable hands.

[Cara J]

I voted no, because the Bible says that it is wrong.
However, I have had premarital sex and that makes me a sinner. I have repented for this sin and asked for forgiveness. But since I cannot change the past I can only work to abide by God's law now and not continue sinning and pray for forgiveness!
Praise God that he sent us his son so that we can be forgiven for our sins and gain eternal life through Him!

[Blessed75]

Well, I voted yes, I don't see a problem with it.........

[beetlequeendiva]

I think sex before marriage is completely wrong...

[beautifulheartache]

I believe it is a sin. Have I? Yes. Am I a sinner? Yes... we all are. Do I think it is OK? There is only ONE judge of us and it is HIM. I believe it takes a special person to wait till after they are married to have sex. And I applaud all who have. I sometimes wish that I had waited... at least until I trully understood the decision I was making. I leave it in God's capable hands.

thank you for being honest and sharing your experience. i agree with you that we are all sinners and that God is the only one to judge... and i would also say that waiting for marriage is ideal, but we shouldn't ever condemn and judge...

[psychoceramic]

I once dated this girl, we were going to wait, then we decided that since we were to marry that sex would be ok.

well nine months (yes you can get pregnant the first time) later she had a wonderful beautiful darling baby girl.

the problem was eight months before that we broke up because she had been sleeping around not just with me but about ten other guys.

well i was lead by God back to the first love i had when i moved to this town and we were married and she has taken my daughter in as her own.

Yet the sin from before, the sex before, a marriage that never happened, not only ruined my life but the mothers life and the daughters life.

As of now my daughter and i are getting along (she is seven) and she understands as much as as she can what happened and why her mom and dad arent together.

she also cries becasue it hurts her that her mom and i are not together and that we dont love each other.

So if you want go ahead and say that God doesnt care if you have sex before you are married, but talk to my daughter and the countless other children out in this world who are hurt because of the foolish feel good things thier parents did with out thinking about them.

By the way both my daughter, myself and my wife serve followand praise God daily for each toher and the things that he has given us.
please pray for my daughters real mom who is still out thier in the world living with out God.

[Markh]

I don't think good can come from pre-marital sex.

if you're in a loving relationship and engaged and all that, why not wait the little longer? If your relationship cannot last without sex before marrige while you are engaged I doubt your marrige is starting on the correct values.

I mean if you think you're in a loving relationship sex can turn what is actually lust (which may eventually be realised later in a relationship without sex) into something you really think is love due to the physical desires, especially if you are a virgin.

Love will be experienced without sex if what you are feeling is love. You don't need sex to prove your love if love is there and felt. That is why sex should be preserved to consumate a marrige with the desire to procreate.

[hisyuk04]

i dont think it is right.. :pink: :clap: :wave:

[Scarmiglione]

I believe it's perfectly alright to have sex with whomever you please, married or not; if, however you do get married, it's only okay to have sex with your spouse(s). I don't believe that religion should be as concerned with sex as it is. Sex is something people do, and not doing it doesn't make you any better of a person. You'll just be all pent-up and deeply frustrated.

[alliedone]

Our body is a temple for the Holy Spirit. I'm going to keep it holy and clean.

:amen: to that! Even more so for boys, although guys get more stares than anyone when they say they are virgins :blush: According to the bible, a man and woman become one once they are married [consumate marriage] then if you do have sex with multiple people, are you not connected to them somehow [spiritually speaking] :confused: ???? Also, when you do have multiple partners [if you should break up with someone and go with another ect], you then begin to compare the sexual prowness of the other person [oh, she was much better at...ect...]. It can get complicated and lead people to further their involvement of going after a mate to 'satisfy' their sexual cravings ect. :o Ok I'm no authority on this but I have friends who are miserable as they go from girl to girl looking for that 'perfect' mate since sex is very important in a relationship :hug:

[Staind]

As a teenager this is possibly one of the most difficult issues to face. Media, peer-pressure all make it out that people are having sex every weekend while doing drugs and drinking beer. Although, this is hopefully not the case some parts of the Bible just seem off. What is lust exactly? According to dictionary.com it's uncontrollable sexual craving. Well, if I'm dating someone with 6 + months and I honestly feel I'm in love with her does that not constitute a purpose for having sex because there would be generally no lust involved here.

Another problem I have is with definitions. The word fornification (possible spelling error, I can never seem to get this word right ;) ) has changed meanings since it was possible used. I like how a lot of people in this thread have shouted that the Bible says sex outside of marriage is completely wrong but have provided no evidence from the Bible claiming this.

By the way, what about previous Pope's who had sex with prostitutes? I mean Pope's have been very corrupt and in theory they're the only person with a direct line to God (I have very limited understanding of the Catholic Religion if someone wants to corrupt me on this, be my guest) then how could they sin so much? I guess it's like a political figure saying smoking pot is bad and then going out and smoking pot.

These are probably the only problems I have with the Christian Religion (at this time ;) )

[Timo]

Media, peer-pressure all make it out that people are having sex every weekend while doing drugs and drinking beer.
I think you're right and I don't think this is a good thing...but then I don't think the media portrays it as a good thing that this happens, it's just that people are quite good at getting only half the picture.

Well, if I'm dating someone with 6 + months and I honestly feel I'm in love with her does that not constitute a purpose for having sex because there would be generally no lust involved here.
I, personally, don't have any issues with that - if you love the person then I can't really see the problem, as long as you know the consequences. Other people do have a problem with it - but that's their problem :D !

Another problem I have is with definitions. The word fornification (possible spelling error, I can never seem to get this word right ) has changed meanings since it was possible used.
You added an 'if' in - it should be fornication. It depends on what version of the Bible you look at - KJV I know has fornication, NIV tends to use 'sexual immorality' (nice and vague and so can be used to condem pretty much anything). I did a nice long post (on
page 19 (http://www.christianforums.com/t77860&page=19)) about the use of the word fornication. Basically I don't reckon it means all sex outside of marriage as it is used in the Bible.

I like how a lot of people in this thread have shouted that the Bible says sex outside of marriage is completely wrong but have provided no evidence from the Bible claiming this.
Yeah, that bugged me a bit; although people do sometimes provide references (normally to 'fornication'). I don't think that anyone has quoted 1 Cor 7: 9
9But if they cannot control themselves, they should marry, for it is better to marry than to burn with passion.
Maybe it is that burn with passion is quite vague (the KJV, interestingly, doesn't have the 'with passion' bit). Maybe it's because you can then point to the sentance before:
Now to the unmarried and the widows I say: It is good for them to stay unmarried, as I am.
Which seems to say that you shouldn't get married, at all - that's the best thing to do; getting married is second choice; burning in passion (whatever that is) is third.

I think in the end it's something that you have to decide on for yourself - don't let anyone else condem you for it because it is not their right to judge you; only God has that right.

[Wolflily]

It's not realistic. Especially when you're a pathetic thirty something like me.

Please don't call yourself pathetic! You undersell your own value as a human being and God's child! I waited a long time to get married and both my husband and I were virgins. It was worth it.

As for those of you who think you have to test the goods before you commit, that's a total myth and a huge, huge mistake. You've got your whole life together to play and learn about each other and try things and get it "right". Most of the beauty of sexual intimacy is in the intimacy part,not necessarily the sex part. It's because you love each other deeply, and trust each other with one of the most vulnerable aspects of your self and your body that makes it so wonderful. It's when God blesses that union and you KNOW your intimacy together reflects God's desire for intimacy with us and pleases Him that also adds to the sweetness of it all.

I vote WAIT WAIT WAIT, even if it takes a couple of decades!

[robl]

There is nothing good that can come from a sexual relationship outside of marriage. Even if you are sure that this is "the one", you should wait until your married. If it is "the one", they will gladly wait until you have vowed your commitment before God and man through the ceremony of marriage. The bible says that sin is pleasurable for a season (Heb. 11:25). You may enjoy what you are doing at the time, (I only say may because if you are filled with the Holy Spirit, He will make sure you aren't) but you will later regret it. If you end up marrying someone else, you have already given the best of yourself away.

God Spoke clearly in Genesis 2:24 "Therefore shall a man leave his father and his mother, and shall cleave unto his WIFE: and they shall become one flesh" The order of progression is first, cleave unto your wife (get married), and the become one flesh (have sex). Jesus repeats this verse in Mat. 19:5 and Mark 10:7-8. Paul also restates it in Eph. 5:31. It is eesential enough that God put it throughout the bible to remind us.

Fornication is simply sex before marriage. After marriage, it becomes adultry if it is not with your spouse. We are exhorted in the bible to be sexually pure and to flee fornication (1 Cor. 15-20). You will also notice in these verses that joining together with another is becoming one flesh (having sex) and is polluting Gods temple (your body). This is not made any easier by the fact that Jesus says looking on another with lust (wanting to have sex with them) is already having done so in your mind. Like any sin, the only way to get rid of it is to starve it to death. You can only do this through God, by giving it over completely to Him. Run when you are faced with temptation, and think on things that are pure and holy. God loves you and will forgive the things of your past (Jesus died for ALL sin) but we are to purify ourselves, even as He is pure (1 John 3:3)

[Staind]

Is thinking about sexual relations really that bad? I mean, just because I think about having sex with a woman does not mean I'm lusting over her.

[robl]

If you think of the act of having sex with her, and she is not your wife, you have fornicated with her already. The only way to be free from the bondage to sexual sin is to flee from it. When you start to have the thoughts, be quick to turn it over to Jesus in prayer. He is faithful and will not leave you. With practice, this becomes just as much of a habit as thinking the sexual thoughts has been. Don't worry! Jesus sent us His Holy Spirit to guide, teach and COMFORT us. Rest in that comfort for a while. When you are refreshed, trust Him to lead you on the path He wants you on. Be faithful to seek Him in all you do. HE LOVES YOU!!!!

[Kathryn]

All things are permissible but this is not the way a Christian should live. Sex is for marriage only if your testamony means anything to you at all!

[LadyBird]

No, it is not okay. God intended sex for MARRIED couples.

[donutman_jr]

im not saying its right but in todays sociaty you have to accept change that take place so we now have to accept sex outside marrige is commen. so we may aswell to to say its ok as long as its not with one or people

[godkilla]

i just noticed all the bull shiaat your all dribbling, the more sex you can get the better, your all a bunch of bible bashers!

[Sk8in4Christ]

I believe that Sex before Marriage is allowed. As long as you dont just sleep around with anyone. You should feel true trust and comitment towards the person you sleep with.

[fisheye]

I definately wouldn't do it.

Do you really think it's that hard to wait??!?!?

[Staind]

im not saying its right but in todays sociaty you have to accept change that take place so we now have to accept sex outside marrige is commen. so we may aswell to to say its ok as long as its not with one or people
So you're saying God should change because people stop believing in his values? That's absurd, sex outside of marriage isn't a new things. It's been around for generations and I believe God is against it.

[JillLars]

God shouldn't change anything, but perhaps we should consider that things aren't as clear cut as we once thought. Many people fail to look at the past and see how once "mainstream" christian beliefs are thought of as absurd today. Take for example the belief that God did not allow inter-racial marriages, or that God supported the enslavement of African-Americans, these were also around for generations, and people thought God was for or against it, our views have changed significantly today.

[kstam]

There is nothing good that can come from a sexual relationship outside of marriage.
<snip>
Fornication is simply sex before marriage. After marriage, it becomes adultry if it is not with your spouse.

Completely agree!

:( Unfortunately a lot of people change the meaning of "fornication" and "adultry" so that they can justify sex outside of marriage. How sad.

"Therefore God gave them over in the sinful desires of their hearts to sexual impurity for the degrading of their bodies with one another. " Romans 1:24

[Kathryn]

im not saying its right but in todays sociaty you have to accept change that take place so we now have to accept sex outside marrige is commen. so we may aswell to to say its ok as long as its not with one or people

So, if society says it's okay, then God is just going to follow whatever the world thinks is best? This is faithlessness.

[matt84]

After;)

[jesusismyhomeboy]

i think its ok. as long as its not same sex. they r sinners.

[Brother Shamus]

I think its ok as long as its not based on lies.
Cause lies make baby jesus cry!

[Town_Bike_Mari]

:pink: I dont think marriage should decide if 2 people are ready to bond. I know a lot of christians who think about doing it alot (maybe too much) but they are too affraid to cross the line just in case. I say go for it whats the worst that can happen.

"Look for the light in those we Trust xx" :angel:

[Brother Shamus]

Philippians 4:6, 7 NLT

Don't worry about anything;
instead, pray about everything.
Tell God what you need, and thank him
for all he has done.
If you do this, you will experience God's peace,
which is far more wonderful than the human mind can understand.
His peace will guard your hearts and minds
as you live in Christ Jesus.

I think if you ask he will provide much tang.

[taedium]

:pink: I dont think marriage should decide if 2 people are ready to bond. I know a lot of christians who think about doing it alot (maybe too much) but they are too affraid to cross the line just in case. I say go for it whats the worst that can happen.

"Look for the light in those we Trust xx" :angel:

The worst that can happen is that you separate with the person, in which case you've just done something very disrespectful to the person that you will marry. You've taken something that should be private, intimate, and exclusive and shared it with someone outside of your marriage. It really isn't any different than cheating.

[Town_Bike_Mari]

Love never fails. But where there are prophecies, they will cease; where there are tongues, they will be stilled; where there is knowledge, it will pass away...And now these things remain: faith, hope and love. But the greatest of these is love.
--1 Corinthians 13:1-8, 13

I think what Corinthians is trying to say is "for thou shall not lick thee statue of david"

[Town_Bike_Mari]

The worst that can happen is that you separate with the person, in which case you've just done something very disrespectful to the person that you will marry. You've taken something that should be private, intimate, and exclusive and shared it with someone outside of your marriage. It really isn't any different than cheating.



One advantage of marriage It seems to me Is that when you fall out of love with him Or he falls out of love with you It keeps you together until maybe you fall in again.
--Judith Viorst

Would you really want to stay with someone that doesnt love who you are? Sitting around just waiting for them to remember what they saw in you in the 1st place.
How horrible.

[taedium]

One advantage of marriage It seems to me Is that when you fall out of love with him Or he falls out of love with you It keeps you together until maybe you fall in again.
--Judith Viorst

Would you really want to stay with someone that doesnt love who you are? Sitting around just waiting for them to remember what they saw in you in the 1st place.
How horrible.

No, I my intent was to say that there is a major consequence to having sex with someone who ultimately ends up not being your marriage partner. Your ability to bond is permanently, irreparably, reduced because you have cheated. Ergo the reason to wait until marriage - to be safe.

[Town_Bike_Mari]

taedium: I'm sorry but I do not understand. We are all gods creatures including animals, insects etc. Some animals have multiple partners to ensure that the species can continue on gods earth. Why should we be limited to 1 person. I think that sharing an intemit moment with people is one of the greatest things about being human. Animals do the deed then leave. We share emotions which if I could I would give to every woman on the planet.

[taedium]

taedium: I'm sorry but I do not understand. We are all gods creatures including animals, insects etc. Some animals have multiple partners to ensure that the species can continue on gods earth. Why should we be limited to 1 person. I think that sharing an intemit moment with people is one of the greatest things about being human. Animals do the deed then leave. We share emotions which if I could I would give to every woman on the planet.

If you don't intend to get married, this doesn't apply. Thats a completely different debate. From what I gather you wouldn't consider cheating during a relationship significant, ergo I don't think any of what I'm saying applies to you.

[Town_Bike_Mari]

taedium: Are you single?

[taedium]

Yes I'm single, I don't see how thats relevent though.

[Town_Bike_Mari]

Well have you ever been in a serious relationship or been married?

[ozanaki tori]

didn't read the thread but:

i believe in one sexual partner. before or after marriage, does not matter, as the sex is marriage in my opinion. if one has sex, they cannot later decide not to get legally married to that person. they are married to that person.

[Staind]

Well have you ever been in a serious relationship or been married?
Does it matter?

[Cozmo]

Marriage should be honored by all, and the marriage bed kept pure, for God will judge the adulterer and all the sexually immoral.
Hebrews 13:4

But I tell you that anyone who divorces his wife, except for marital unfaithfulness, causes her to become an adulteress, and anyone who marries the divorced woman commits adultery.
Mathew 5:32

You shall not commit adultery.
Exodus 20:14

But a man who commits adultery lacks judgment; whoever does so destroys himself.
Proverbs 6:32

I choose sex after marriage.

:angel:

[taedium]

didn't read the thread but:

i believe in one sexual partner. before or after marriage, does not matter, as the sex is marriage in my opinion. if one has sex, they cannot later decide not to get legally married to that person. they are married to that person.

Switch the word 'legally' with 'morally' and you've summarized my view on sex.

[tim the surfer]

if it's BEFORE you get married, then I think it's OK. Sex outside of marriage once you're committed is a no-go.

and to people who say the bible doesn't allow either i say one thing - get with the times

[robl]

if it's BEFORE you get married, then I think it's OK. Sex outside of marriage once you're committed is a no-go.

and to people who say the bible doesn't allow either i say one thing - get with the times
The times should'n't alter what the bible says. It's timeless. Besides, we are living in evil times when men are calling good evil, and evil good. You have to go by what God says, not what man says.

[engiin]

Why worry about sex before marriage? Why not just get married, and then worry about sex?

[ozanaki tori]

hmm..I'm not sure how you mean morally?

Basically what I was saying was that you can't say 'oh we're not legally married so I'm leaving you!' or something like that.

[joshua_cheung]

Why worry about sex before marriage? Why not just get married, and then worry about sex?

Because before they get married. When they are together and in the suitable enviroment, they have sexual fantasy with each other. Even they don't have sexual fantasy, just holding hands and kisses can stimulate their lusts to each other.

[Cozmo]

if it's BEFORE you get married, then I think it's OK. Sex outside of marriage once you're committed is a no-go.

and to people who say the bible doesn't allow either i say one thing - get with the times

The Bible doesn't state that commandments can and will be altered as time goes on. With that rational, nowadays Jesus wouldn't need to die for our sins because at the rate we're going, we'd be able to save ourselves or at least clone ourselves until we get it right. ;) God is the same yesterday, today, tomorrow and forevermore. I would say - get with the Bible. I pray that you spend some time searching the scripture and getting to know God.

For verily I say unto you, Till heaven and earth pass, one jot or one tittle shall in no wise pass from the law, till all be fulfilled.
Whosoever therefore shall break one of these least commandments, and shall teach men so, he shall be called the least in the kingdom of heaven: but whosoever shall do and teach them, the same shall be called great in the kingdom of heaven.
Mathew 5:18+19

:angel:

[MYMOM]

no

[hey]

DEFINITELY NO!

[JillLars]

Why should we be limited to 1 person. I think that sharing an intemit moment with people is one of the greatest things about being human. Animals do the deed then leave. We share emotions which if I could I would give to every woman on the planet.The reason we have those emotions is because we are different from animals. We are meant to share those special emotions with one person, for life. Why would you want to share intimate moments with every woman on the planet? Wouldn't that cheapen them and make them less special?

While I don't think the bible condemns sex before marriage. The bible is clear that we are only to join ourselves with one person, that is one of the many things that sets us apart from animals. You need to understand that intercourse between humans is more than just phsyically binding, it is spiritually binding, and that is why we should limit ourselves to one person.

[sweetpea20405]

I don't know if that whole spiritually binding thing applies but I do know that having sex with multiple partners is like leaving some part of you behind that you can't identify but you miss it(if that makes any sense) and if you get married and have sex with your spouse you're always thinking of the other people you slept with. It makes you feel, in a marriage situation, that you aren't able to give your all to your spouse because you've shared with it so many others in the past. To me, it's not worth having to go through the emotional things that come with that and if and when I get married I want to be able to offer my husband everything not just my previous partners' leftovers.

[RhetorTheo]

Are the Bible verses about fornication limited to their time, i.e., are they really saying that it was sin to fornicate before artificial birth control was effective and readily available? Pork was dangerous to eat back in the days of the Law, but it's safe to eat now - is this the same thing? Does God make things forbidden because they are too dangerous, or because they are immoral irrespective of their consequences in this life?

Does a couple need to be legally married to be married in the Bible's terms? Were Adam and Eve legally married? If a Christian couple considers themselves exclusive, or special to one another, are they "married"?

[robl]

Are the Bible verses about fornication limited to their time, i.e., are they really saying that it was sin to fornicate before artificial birth control was effective and readily available? Pork was dangerous to eat back in the days of the Law, but it's safe to eat now - is this the same thing? Does God make things forbidden because they are too dangerous, or because they are immoral irrespective of their consequences in this life?

Does a couple need to be legally married to be married in the Bible's terms? Were Adam and Eve legally married? If a Christian couple considers themselves exclusive, or special to one another, are they "married"?
The bible states that the two beome one after marriage. This is sequential meaning that they get married, then become one (have sex). Birth control was not the issue then or now. The two become one regardless of whether or not birth control is used. Pork was specifically forbidden for the Jews. Paul clears this up in Romans and Timothy and the author of Hebrews addresses this as well. It is clear in the new testament that sex outside of marriage (fornication or adultery) are forbidden. They are not safe by any means. The diseases that are rampant now do not care if birth control is used. Genital warts cannot be effectively prevented even if condoms are used.

God forbids sex outside of marriage because it prevents us from receiving His best for us, which is sex within the confines of marriage. If you pollute this by having sex outside of marriage, you are missing out on what is truly one of best blessings he has given us on this earth. A healthy relationship with a spouse is far more pleasurable than the momentary gratification that sex outside of marriage may bring.

Marriage is a covenant that a man and a woman legally enter into before God and man. Marriage is first referred to in Genesis 3 in referrence to Adam and Eve. Just considering yourselves exclusive or special does not provide a binding covenant between the two. If you grow tired of each other, there is nothing legally binding to keep you together. You can leave at will. To break the covenant of marriage, you would have to be legally divorced, which is something that God hates (read Malachi, it's short). God desires for sex to be between a man and a wife in the lifelong covenant of marriage. Hope this helps!

In His Love,
Rob

[Miaka-Chan]

There are reasons for rules. God's rules are meant to protect us. I once heard a really neat study on why we should not have sex out of a marital relationship. Protecting us from STDS and Single parenting is only 1 reason. But also it can be to much commitment and may make a person stay with somone they should not be with.

[NiemandheißtBoshaftigkeit]

lo de da....

[JillLars]

Marriage is a covenant that a man and a woman legally enter into before God and man. Marriage is first referred to in Genesis 3 in referrence to Adam and Eve.
Yes, Adam and Eve were married, but they weren't married "legally." Why? Because there was no law, their was no such thing as civil marriage at the time. I agree that it is a covenant, but it doesn't always have to be legal. God knows people's hearts and he knows if they make promises and keep them.

Just considering yourselves exclusive or special does not provide a binding covenant between the two.
I agree with this, making a covenant consists of much more, two people promise their lives to one another and they include God in this promise. Even if they don't have the big hoopla ceremony, God is very much a part of the promises we make and include him in. It is much more than just being exclusive and being special to one another.

[Jesusfrk4life77]

well, in the Bible it sayz that u shouldnt have sex 'fore marriage cuz ya know....like that person said....after your married u become like one soul and if u did it outside of marriage u could get STD's and all this mess! y not save all the trouble and wait ill AFTER your married~! One Love, One God, One Way!
Souled Out 4 Jesus,
Alexis M

[jive]

where in bible does it say its wrong? if someone could give me some script that would be kool. and mybee some reps :help: so i could get a kooler avi and a profile pic and send pics and um...anyway ive always been told its wrong, but never read it for myself. dont have to worry bout that now though, married last sept. 20.

[*karen*]

Congrats on the marriage Jive!

[Melior]

It's better to wait, even if not for religious reasons. All the STDs and stuff is enough to put anyone off.

[robl]

where in bible does it say its wrong? if someone could give me some script that would be kool. and mybee some reps :help: so i could get a kooler avi and a profile pic and send pics and um...anyway ive always been told its wrong, but never read it for myself. dont have to worry bout that now though, married last sept. 20.
Theres some scripture references in this post.

http://www.christianforum.com/showthread.php?p=1711915&postcount=309

[ilovethelord]

No way should you have any kind of sexual relations with anyone before marriage

1Cr 6:18 Flee fornication. Every sin that a man doeth is without the body; but he that committeth fornication sinneth against his own body.

1Th 4:3 For this is the will of God, [even] your sanctification, that ye should abstain from fornication:

In the greek the word fornication
#4202 and or 03 =por-ni-ah indulaging in unlawful lust which means lust before marriage beacuse if your lusting after your wife thats lawful and fine its your wife your
vowed togather..When you read your wedding vows you become one flesh..

But not being married and having sex makes you A sinner and Judgment accordenly.

[Skrock77]

sex outside of marriage is a deffinent No, NO

[jive]

Congrats on the marriage Jive!thank you.:wave: thanks for the scripture too.

[superbear02]

I belive it is clearly evident in the Bible that sex should only be between married (man and woman) as they are now one flesh after marriage

[daidhaid]

sex can range from no big deal to pretty important.
so can marriage.

In a couple of hours I could be standing in front of an Elvis Impersonator marrying a Lap Dance in Las Vegas.
there is nothing particularly sacred about marriage or sex.

I don't care who marries who or who has sex with who.
I especialy don't care if some third party sees it as sacred or profane.
What I do care about are attempts to enforce norms or make those views law for everyone else.

[Free Spirit Sin]

It's quite alright, but hey, I'm just an atheist.

However, I personally believe in waiting for love, not necessarily marriage. It's an experience to share with someone you love when you think you're ready.

That's just me though. :-)

[Umbra]

I belive it is clearly evident in the Bible that sex should only be between married (man and woman) as they are now one flesh after marriage


My thoughts exactly :clap:

[Gsapious]

When two people have sex, God declares them to be one flesh.

15 Know ye not that your bodies are the members of Christ? shall I then take the members of Christ, and make them the members of an harlot? God forbid.
16 What? know ye not that he which is joined to an harlot is one body? for two, saith he, shall be one flesh.
17 But he that is joined unto the Lord is one spirit.

Hey, if you manage to have sex before marriage and stick with the person, it's all fine. But if things don't work before having the commitment of marriage, and you go on to someone else... It's like trying to break the bond God declared when you and your mate have sex. So... If you stick with the person, it's alright. But you should wait until the commitment of marriage. Before the vows... anything could go wrong.

[Dysarrae]

I believe that sex in any commited and loving relationship is ok....it's an expression of how much you love the person. I had planned to stay a virgin until I met my first love....we're no longer together, but I certainly wouldn't want to change what I shared with him.

[aanjt]

It's quite alright, but hey, I'm just an atheist.

However, I personally believe in waiting for love, not necessarily marriage. It's an experience to share with someone you love when you think you're ready.

That's just me though. :-)

I don't quite understand this. What do you mean that you don't necessarily believe in waiting for marriage? Do you mean that it's okay to marry (and possibly divorce) if one does not love that person, but one should wait for love, hence love and marriage should not and may not be exclusive? Or, do you mean that marriage should not be a given. If one waits for love and "finds it", that does not automatically mean they should marry. Or, did you mean something else entirely.

Yours in Christ,
Jen

[x_doulos]

i have a question for the christian men...would you still marry someone even though they have had sex with their previous partners in their past? would you still be able to marry her knowing that? unfortunaly, the two men i asked said no, they wouldnt be able to forgive her, even if they loved her...im just wondering

[daidhaid]

i have a question for the christian men...would you still marry someone even though they have had sex with their previous partners in their past? would you still be able to marry her knowing that? unfortunaly, the two men i asked said no, they wouldnt be able to forgive her, even if they loved her...im just wondering

those guys are jerks.
They are probably most concerned with being compared to another lover and found lacking.

[Timo]

i have a question for the christian men...would you still marry someone even though they have had sex with their previous partners in their past? would you still be able to marry her knowing that? unfortunaly, the two men i asked said no, they wouldnt be able to forgive her, even if they loved her...im just wondering

Don't really see what there is there to forgive - or at least for the man to forgive. I wouldn't have a problem with at all.

[mindlight]

Where in the bible does it say clearly that pre-marital sex is sin?

The Bible does not permit casual relationships before or after marriage as its prohbitions on adultery (Commandment no 7) and on fornication indicate.

In Genesis 2 God lays down a pattern of monogamous faithful relationship between one man and one woman. It is a relationship of equals and is referred to by Jesus in Math 19 when discussing divorce as the ideal pattern for a relationship.

Through history we have never lived in a culture with so much sexual freedom. Now for the first time people can make genuine and uncoerced decisions about sexual relationships in a way that they could not have done in previous generations. I believe that marriage is that moment when a couple both decide before God they are committed to each other. Adam and Eve had no ceremony nor community to affirm their bond but it was nonetheless real and the bedrock of the world community that would spring from them with its blessings and its faults. I think that this decision to commit to another human being should not be taken lightly as when taken it is a commitment for life - what God has joined together let not man separate. There may thus be grounds in the Bible for considering marriage as something that in reality can occur before a ceremony affirms it, although the ideal would still be that sex follows ceremony

In the modern world there is little excuse to wait for a proper religious ceremony to affirm a bond beyond our own indiscipline or weakness regarding sexual matters. But on the occasions where people have gotten into a sexual relationship and where there was always genuine intention to marry anyway I believe that relationship has brought with it all the implications of commitment for life. It is better to remain committed to that relationship than to burn in passion outside of it. Where there was not intention to marry and the only real grounds of the relationship are lust then I believe a relationship is to be repented of and forgiveness sought from God and counselling from mature Christians. The process of restoration after such repentance can sometimes take years and takes some painful decisions. Given the true cost of sex outside genuine committed relationship there are numerous people walking round with wounds they do not even recognise as such. Thus they bleed a lifetime before wondering what it was that made them so weak and confused.

[forIsrael]

i dont know....i wouldnt care if i married someone who already had sex, as long as they didnt have stds.

but i think youre not supposed to, but if u really want to show someone how much u love them, i dunno.

i wouldnt just do it casually though.

i would only have sex outside marriage if i really loved them.

[Tangnefedd]

I think making sure that one is sexually compatable with one's partner before marriage is very sensible, it saves a lot of heartache, and possible divorce afterwards! I put these same remarks on a thread in the life stages forum and had it sensored, LOL!!!! :clap:

[Energie]

Well It's been a long road...should you take the road less traveled. Let me tell you from experience...The freeway is the wrong way!! Congestion...smog...
angry drivers...rusty cars...dirty cars. Without a doubt, I can say based on my personal experiences as a redeemed sinner; wait for sex. It will save you a lot of heart ache. Some might say however....well than I'll only have sex with one woman the rest of my life or vice versa...Well; that's exactly what the Devil would want you to think. Don't listen to the media, don't listen to your other head...don't listen to anything but the Holy Spirit.

Energie

[msrene]

Agree Energie. Many people have been doing much talking about how sex outside of marriage is so 'great'. It is such an approach that has been a great aid to bringing about the most deadly disease known to date, AIDS. Back in the 60's they talked of 'free love' while turning a blind eye to the one that gave and continues to give the utmost in love for all mankind - Jesus.

40 years later - and still some have not caught on to that fact. But then it has been a lie that the devil has been using for a LONG time - - much longer than just 40 years......

[daidhaid]

this is not the big deal some of you are making it out to be.
If you want to wait till a preacher says go for it fine you still need to try and choose a good partner .
If you want to just go for it, well, you still have to try to make a good choice.
It boils down to choosing the right person to have sex with.

If you choose the wrong person you get a less than desirable result.
If you choose the wrong persons consistently then you get to preach and testify about the evils of sex.

I landed in the middle. I was on the above mentioned freeway until I got married.
A few of those partners I choose not to dwell on , while most are pleasant memories.
I learned a few things along the way.

And at the age of 27 decided I knew what I wanted when I found it.
Married that girl and we have been happy ever since.
we even survived that crazy decade when we were Christians.
3 good kids and no complaints.

I isn't at all about someone else validating your decisions.
It's up to you to choose not some control-freak in a pulpit.
choose well and practice can make perfect.
choose poorly and you'll probably end up going to church a lot.

[AmeriLovesJesus]

i have a question for the christian men...would you still marry someone even though they have had sex with their previous partners in their past? would you still be able to marry her knowing that? unfortunaly, the two men i asked said no, they wouldnt be able to forgive her, even if they loved her...im just wondering by: x_doulos

I found this looking through the posts.. I cannot believe these two men said this.. and you could agree with them... JESUS said to love our neighbors as ourlseves.. forgive our enemies.. How can you possibly... agree what they said.. is ok!!!

JESUS IS LOVE, JESUS IS FORGIVENESS..

You are so hooked on.. sex before marriage here and telling people what to do.. when you forgot to see what the true meaning of JESUS is.. before you go telling anybody anything.. check your words.. please..

There cannot be anything.. without LOVE & Forgiveness..

We want Jesus to forgive us.. for our wrongs.. as we all have.. but why should he forgive us... if we cannot forgive others.. and thats exactly.. what he will do.. If we hold a grudge against our brothers.. & sisters.. then he will hold a grudge against us..

TREAT OTHERS AS YOU WOULD WANT TO BE TREATED...

Jesus is everything.. Jesus is LOVE & FORGIVENESS!!!

Just like in the bible..(forgive me if Im a little off, dont know it by heart).. One of the servants was brought to the king.. he had owed him some money.. but pleaded to the king to forgive him.. and give him more time.. but the King forgave him for what he did... and told him he didnt have to pay back anything.. but then the servant... ran to a fellow servant.. asking him where his money was that he owed him... the fellow servant... pleaded to him... just as he pleaded to the King.. but he wasnt as forgiving.. to others... as the king was to him.. so he threw his fellow servant into Jail... The King finds out about it and asks.. him.. why?... so the king threw him in jail til he paid back the money..

Incase I lost anyone.. You want poeple to forgive you... then you forgive others.. the same..

I know its hard.. and Jesus knows it too.. but he will help us along the way...

Stop worrying about sex.. stop worrying about marriage.. STOP WORRYING!!

Instead of fighting.. and judging.. and disagreeing.. Lets all share the beauty Jesus has brought us into our lives...

We all will fight but by the end of the night.. we alll still love JESUS!!!

Oh yeah!! and stop saying if this person did this he doesnt love you enough... or even at all.. or he would have done this!!!! BLAH BLAH BLAH!!!

Remember if love is measured in that way... then surely we surely dont love Jesus like we think we do.. Yeah!! that sure doesnt make you feel good for me to say that.. right... of course not.. I wouldnt feel right either.. but its true... if you see love that way..

WELL GUESS WHAT JESUS DOESNT..he doesnt love us by how many things we do for him.. His Love never changes.. even when we do so very wrong.. his love never changes.. HE LOVES US UNCONDITIONALLY!!

One more thing who are these men.. to judge these girls of what they had down in their pasts?...

Im sorry all of you!!! I just had to answer this post.. I didnt even read past it.. after I saw it I had to answer it...

Thank you!!!

Ameri Loves Jesus

[x_doulos]

I found this looking through the posts.. I cannot believe these two men said this.. and you could agree with them... JESUS said to love our neighbors as ourlseves.. forgive our enemies.. How can you possibly... agree what they said.. is ok!!!


You are so hooked on.. sex before marriage here and telling people what to do.. when you forgot to see what the true meaning of JESUS is.. before you go telling anybody anything.. check your words.. please..


Stop worrying about sex.. stop worrying about marriage.. STOP WORRYING!!


[B]Oh yeah!! and stop saying if this person did this he doesnt love you enough... or even at all.. or he would have done this!!!! BLAH BLAH BLAH!!!



wow, umm i didnt mean to get such a heated reply... i was just simply putting out a question that my friend and i were struggling over. you say im so hooked on sex before marriage...well that happens to be a part of my life and since my friend and i just recently became christians, we are both pretty confused about certain things.

im sorry if i offended you with my post, i was just raised with didnt morals and views on society, and i dont have any christian friends... so i just use these forums as a way to learn more about the christan faith. i do read the bible and there is only so much you can learn from reading it. this website helps me to see christians veiws in society and how they are used. i dont know...i was just a little confused...again sorry if i offended you
leslie

[CrazyTech]

It's looked down upon in the Bible yes, as are many things we do. I'm not quite sure of the verses right off, but I have read them before. Now, does that mean you're going straight to hell if you do it? Nope. It's the same as anything else, it's up to you, but it's probably a better idea for many reasons to wait until you find the one. (At least IMHO.)

I don't think at all that it would make a person 'bad' if they did have sex previously outside of marriage. If you really love that person, then you'll love them just about no matter what.

Personally, I'm going to wait without a doubt. It comes down to the choice of the people in the end of course. It's just my belief that it's one of those things you're supposed to keep sacred.

[AmeriLovesJesus]

wow, umm i didnt mean to get such a heated reply... i was just simply putting out a question that my friend and i were struggling over. you say im so hooked on sex before marriage...well that happens to be a part of my life and since my friend and i just recently became christians, we are both pretty confused about certain things.

im sorry if i offended you with my post, i was just raised with didnt morals and views on society, and i dont have any christian friends... so i just use these forums as a way to learn more about the christan faith. i do read the bible and there is only so much you can learn from reading it. this website helps me to see christians veiws in society and how they are used. i dont know...i was just a little confused...again sorry if i offended you
leslie

Leslie...

No need to apologize.. I should be apologizing.. the whole.. post was directed to different posters.. I should have stated some names.. but.. I just quickly read through everything..

I quoted yours it worried me.. That Jesus is about love and forgiveness.. Those two Christian men.. that you asked.. they need to look closer to what Jesus is really about..

Don't be like those two men.. even if it is their own opinion.. Jesus wants us to forgive others.. and really there is no forgiveness.. needed by them.. because what someone does in their past.. is no one buisness.. not even theirs.. They said even if they loved them so much they couldn't forgive them.. yes forgiving is very hard to do.. but when we have Jesus with us.. everything comes more into place..

Our biggest problem is actually forgiving ourselves.. which we also must learn to do.. We come back and forth to Jesus asking for forgiveness for something.. hes already forgiven.. when in all actuality... it is us..

I would love to share so many things with you.. if you'd like..

Just so you know.. remember that love is about forgiveness..

When you come acroos a problem.. where it seems to hard to forgive.. someone.. remember what Jesus has done.. and remember.. He's always with you and he will help you..

I can understand where you are coming from.. Society.. is very hard to deal with.. It has made us believe many of the wrong things..


I welcome you and your friend!! I am very glad you both have found Jesus.. He is the greatest... he helps us through anything.. Sometimes..before I fall asleep.. I'll imagine myself.. sitting on a swing.. with him.. talking about my day.. and ever since I first started doing it.. I have gotten such peaceful sleep.. You should try it!!!

Remember also.. That when no one else seems to understand.. Jesus does.. he listens even when you dont speak.. He listens to our heart!! He never forgets anyone.. and never ignores a prayer.. He hears us all!!!! Even when we dont have the words to explain to him how we feel.. he knows what we mean!!!!

Again!! I apologize for my mistake!!!

With Love,
Ameri Loves Jesus!!

[GlowingFirefly]

Sex before marrage is compelty wrong and should never be done. Comitting adultry is breaking one of God's 10 commandments, Thou shall not commit adultry. It is right there in black and white. It also leads to many other issues in life, such as guilt, and dropping out of school to take care of the baby, or maybe the baby's biological parents decide to break up, who keeps the baby?

I believe having sex before marriage is a terrible sin, and should never even be thought about.

[Ginsu]

Agreed.

[sammipher]

I know some may disagree with me...but I don't think sex out of marriage is good...I mean I didnt wait so I speak from experience you really regret it...I was not a christian then either...had I been saved then I think I would have waited until I was married...both my husband and I regret it. I think it is something really special when you can wear white on your wedding day because you did the right thing...i wasnt a christian when i got married....my husband and I were saved in august 2003...So I had to wear a off cream white dress because I made a choice and I have to deal with it.

[JillLars]

I know some may disagree with me...but I don't think sex out of marriage is good...I mean I didnt wait so I speak from experience you really regret it...I was not a christian then either...had I been saved then I think I would have waited until I was married...both my husband and I regret it. I think it is something really special when you can wear white on your wedding day because you did the right thing...i wasnt a christian when i got married....my husband and I were saved in august 2003...So I had to wear a off cream white dress because I made a choice and I have to deal with it.

That's interesting to me, did someone make you wear an off white dress because you weren't a virgin? I find it a little odd that you would punish yourself for something you didn't consider to be a sin at the time (because you weren't a Christian). I have never heard of a church forcing a woman to wear an off white dress because of her sexual status. The white dress doesn't always signify purity either (as many people think)
From: http://www.eternalechoes.com/weddingtraditions.htm

It should be noted that a white wedding dress is in no way indicative of the "purity" of the bride-to-be. Indeed, white is not accorded as a symbol of chastity, but of joy.

[jazzbird]

Sex outside of marriage is an abomination to God. We sin against Him, ourselves and our partner. There is always a consequence to sin, even if it seems we are getting away with something at the time. Sexual sin especially, has the potential for far reaching consequences. (I mean, look what happened to King David from one lustful action). From personal experience just let me say that even if you don't contract a disease or get pregnant, there are emotional and spiritual issues that result. It's so not worth it. It's selfish. It cheapens your understanding of real love and your ability to give freely and trust wholly. You can never regain that state of innocence to give to the one person God intends you to share it with - your spouse.

[Smoky]

Fornication is definately a sin condemned in the Bible :
1 Cor. 6:18 (ESV):
“Flee from sexual immorality (fornication kjv). Every other sin a person commits is outside the body, but the sexually immoral person sins against his own body.”
So what is fornication? The greek word translated fornication in KJV bible is a word which originally referred to prostition but later came to refer to all kinds of sexual immorality including incest, adultery, and premarital sex. The word is “porneia” from which we get our word “pornography”. The definition in Strong’s greek dictionary is: from Greek 4203 (porneuo); harlotry (including adultery and incest); figurative idolatry :- fornication.

How do we know that it includes premarital sex? Well , a few verses down in 1Cor. 7:1-2, Paul tells us that fornication is something that we can avoid by getting married:
1 Cor. 7:1-2 (ESV)
Now concerning the matters about which you wrote: "It is good for a man not to have sexual relations with a woman." [2] But because of the temptation to sexual immorality (fornication kjv), each man should have his own wife and each woman her own husband.

The only sexuall temptation that marriage prevents is premarital sex! One can be married and still have the temptation to commit adultery and other kinds of immorality. If premarital sex were OK, then marriage would only increase temptation, since sex would then be restricted to only one partner. Before, there was more freedom, since marriage vows were not maid. So since one is to “avoid fornication” by getting married, we know that premarital sex is on the list of immoralities included in the word “porneuo”.

Then too, we know from 1 Corr. 6:15-16, that having sex with a person tends to bond them with the kind of unity reserved for the marriage relationship:
1 Cor. 6:15-16 (ESV)
Do you not know that your bodies are members of Christ? Shall I then take the members of Christ and make them members of a prostitute? Never! [16] Or do you not know that he who is joined to a prostitute becomes one body with her? For, as it is written, "The two will become one flesh."

[SeraphWolf79]

Amen Smoky & Jazzbird! ;) I love your explanations, they're right on target! It's a shame so many people take the Word of God and twist it to satisfy their own personal desires. You can't pick apart the bible and ignore the parts you don't agree with. Remember, just because "everybody" is doing it, doesn't make it right! :)

[TrustNo1]

i had sex at an early age and i regret it. i think it is a bad thing outside of marriage.

[Gods_Girl]

Pre-marital sex is a sin because God said so, fornication means "Pre-marital. Most of the bible is about sexual sin, the wages of sexual sin is Aids and other horrible diseases!!! Anyone who has sex before marriage is only satisfying their greedy lusts!!! and don't love their partner, because they couldn't wait until marriage. The people who justify sexual sin are due for grave punishment!


Fornication = Pre-marital sex = Hell!!!!!

[TrustNo1]

and im guessing you forgot the whole Jesus saga of Ad30 where one man died for your sins staring in alphabetical order: Jesus as himself.

[Gods_Girl]

It's a shame so many people take the Word of God and twist it to satisfy their own personal desires. You can't pick apart the bible and ignore the parts you don't agree with. Remember, just because "everybody" is doing it, doesn't make it right! :)


Amen

[Gods_Girl]

Pre-marital sex is a sin because God said so.

[TrustNo1]

God said to kill homosexuals so go on go out young one and kill. :)

[Gods_Girl]

God said to kill homosexuals so go on go out young one and kill. :)

Hate the sin, love the sinner.

Homosexuality is an abomination to God!!!!

[prince didymus]

...and don't love their partner, because they couldn't wait until marriage.
Nonsense.

[x_doulos]

Fornication = Pre-marital sex = Hell!!!!!

so basically you are saying that bc i have had sexual relationships before im going to hell...is that what you are telling my? because i am sexually active with my boyfriend that i am going to hell...even though i am saved...im still going to hell?
-leslie

[Gods_Girl]

so basically you are saying that bc i have had sexual relationships before im going to hell...is that what you are telling my? because i am sexually active with my boyfriend that i am going to hell...even though i am saved...im still going to hell?
-leslie

No, i was just mocking slogans i have read on this thread and others. you know, the same old cliche statements Christians make if you don't fully agree with them?, i have read much worse condemnation and small minded attitudes on other forums.

If your fully committed to your partner for life, I believe that constitutes of marriage in Gods eyes. A ceremony or certificate doesn't show that you are anymore or less committed, i believe.

[UGADawgs87]

I made a bad decesion by having sex, at 16yrs old and i regret it VERY MUCH. But with God's help i will get over it by time

[aanjt]

Pre-marital sex is a sin because God said so, fornication means "Pre-marital. Most of the bible is about sexual sin, the wages of sexual sin is Aids and other horrible diseases!!! Anyone who has sex before marriage is only satisfying their greedy lusts!!! and don't love their partner, because they couldn't wait until marriage. The people who justify sexual sin are due for grave punishment!


Fornication = Pre-marital sex = Hell!!!!!

So, pre-marital sex is unforgivable? Did my husband and I have pre-marital sex? Yes. Do we wish we would have waited? Yes. Did we love each other before we married? Yes. How long have we been married? 14 years in June. Do you we still love each other? More than one can imagine.

How about the people who got AIDS from bad blood from blood transfustions (before blood was tested). How about a woman I know of who got AIDS because her husband cheated on her. Did she get AIDS because she was sexually immoral? If she was sexually immoral, please tell me what sexual sin she committed by having sex with her husband, who unbeknowst to her was having an affair. If a pre-marital sex always leads to AIDS, why do I not have AIDS nor my husband? How about those precious babies who are born with AIDS? What sexual sin did they commit?

Yours in Christ,
Jen

[aanjt]

God's_girl,

I didn't quite read down to the other post you made stating that you were mocking those who says these quotes before I posted.

Yours in Christ,
Jen

[Gods_Girl]

God's_girl,

I didn't quite read down to the other post you made stating that you were mocking those who says these quotes before I posted.

Yours in Christ,
Jen

Yes as i said before "If your fully committed to your partner for life, I believe that constitutes of marriage in Gods eyes. A ceremony or certificate doesn't show that you are anymore or less committed"

I can't control my anger i have towards Christians who say those who have Sex before marriage don't love each other, and say all the other rubbish.

I think it's pure hypocrisy i really do, Most Christians go running around condemning people for pre-marital sex,when they themselves have had sex before marriage and the bible does not state what constitutes of Marriage. I think life commitment in Gods presence is a Statement of Marriage.

It sends me out of my mind with anger, the small minded condemning posts i read on this thread and Christian forums. It also iritates me that im going to heaven with some of these people. :help:

[AmeriLovesJesus]

Yes as i said before "If your fully committed to your partner for life, I believe that constitutes of marriage in Gods eyes. A ceremony or certificate doesn't show that you are anymore or less committed"

I can't control my anger i have towards Christians who say those who have Sex before marriage don't love each other, and say all the other rubbish.

I think it's pure hypocrisy i really do, Most Christians go running around condemning people for pre-marital sex,when they themselves have had sex before marriage and the bible does not state what constitutes of Marriage. I think life commitment in Gods presence is a Statement of Marriage.

It sends me out of my mind with anger, the small minded condemning posts i read on this thread and Christian forums. It also iritates me that im going to heaven with some of these people. :help:

[YHWH, know his name]

Well, if we were to take a quick glance at the scriptures, we would not even have to think on this subject, for this point has been stated several times in the bible. 1Corinthians 6:9,
"What! Do you not know that unrighteous persons will not inherit God's kindom? Do not be misled. Neither fornicators, nor idolaters, nor adulterers, nor men kept for unnatural purposes, nor men who lie with men, nor thieves, nor greedy persons, nor drunkards, nor revilers, nor extortioners will inherit God's kingdom." NWT (yes and go ahead and check your KJV for it says the same things, I check both for the acurracy of both)

This outlines all of the things that will not allow you to become part of God's new Kindom.

[aanjt]

Well, if we were to take a quick glance at the scriptures, we would not even have to think on this subject, for this point has been stated several times in the bible. 1Corinthians 6:9,
"What! Do you not know that unrighteous persons will not inherit God's kindom? Do not be misled. Neither fornicators, nor idolaters, nor adulterers, nor men kept for unnatural purposes, nor men who lie with men, nor thieves, nor greedy persons, nor drunkards, nor revilers, nor extortioners will inherit God's kingdom." NWT (yes and go ahead and check your KJV for it says the same things, I check both for the acurracy of both)

This outlines all of the things that will not allow you to become part of God's new Kindom.

So, God was lying and so was Christ about the forgiveness of sins? You mean, that even though I had pre-marital sex, even though I earnestly repented of it with body, soul and mind, that God will not forgive that sin? Christ was lying when Christ said the only unforgiveable sin was agains the Holy Spirit? Christ was lying when he told the woman caught in adultery that he will not judge her (paraphrasing) but in reality she is going to hell?

But, you know what? Even if I found out for sure that I was going to hell and that there would be no chance of me entering into heaven, I will still worship God. I will still follow Christ. I will still help those less fortunate than I am. I will still let the light of Christ shine through. I will still be Christ to others. My love for God, my worshiping God does not hinge on whether I enter into heaven.

I just think it is a huge stumbling block to say or imply to others that if they had sex outside of marriage in their past, that even though if they regret ever having doing so that they will still go to hell. Where is the love of Christ in all of that? Where is the love of Christ when he told the theif on the cross "thou shall see me in paradise"? Why pray "forgive us our sins" if they won't be forgiven? What is the point of forgiving someone who has wronged you if they won't be forgiven by God? Do humans really have more mercy than God? I don't think we do.

Now, if I have grossly misread you, please correct me.

Yours in Christ,
Jen

[Gods_Girl]

So, God was lying and so was Christ about the forgiveness of sins? You mean, that even though I had pre-marital sex, even though I earnestly repented of it with body, soul and mind, that God will not forgive that sin? Christ was lying when Christ said the only unforgiveable sin was agains the Holy Spirit? Christ was lying when he told the woman caught in adultery that he will not judge her (paraphrasing) but in reality she is going to hell?

But, you know what? Even if I found out for sure that I was going to hell and that there would be no chance of me entering into heaven, I will still worship God. I will still follow Christ. I will still help those less fortunate than I am. I will still let the light of Christ shine through. I will still be Christ to others. My love for God, my worshiping God does not hinge on whether I enter into heaven.

I just think it is a huge stumbling block to say or imply to others that if they had sex outside of marriage in their past, that even though if they regret ever having doing so that they will still go to hell. Where is the love of Christ in all of that? Where is the love of Christ when he told the theif on the cross "thou shall see me in paradise"? Why pray "forgive us our sins" if they won't be forgiven? What is the point of forgiving someone who has wronged you if they won't be forgiven by God? Do humans really have more mercy than God? I don't think we do.

Now, if I have grossly misread you, please correct me.

Yours in Christ,
Jen


Double Amen :bow:

I've done mistakes in life that i regret, and boy did fellow Christians Gossip and judge me for it. I'm just glad there are some humble understanding Christians out there. I nearly become a born again atheist a couple of months back because i was hurt and Angry that i saw no evidence of Christ in Christians. It only drives you away from Christian teaching, but you feel the holy spirit convict you, and that will never seperate me from God.

[Rosa Mystica]

Glad to hear of your renewed faith, Gods_Girl

[jazzbird]

So, God was lying and so was Christ about the forgiveness of sins? You mean, that even though I had pre-marital sex, even though I earnestly repented of it with body, soul and mind, that God will not forgive that sin? Christ was lying when Christ said the only unforgiveable sin was agains the Holy Spirit? Christ was lying when he told the woman caught in adultery that he will not judge her (paraphrasing) but in reality she is going to hell?

But, you know what? Even if I found out for sure that I was going to hell and that there would be no chance of me entering into heaven, I will still worship God. I will still follow Christ. I will still help those less fortunate than I am. I will still let the light of Christ shine through. I will still be Christ to others. My love for God, my worshiping God does not hinge on whether I enter into heaven.

I just think it is a huge stumbling block to say or imply to others that if they had sex outside of marriage in their past, that even though if they regret ever having doing so that they will still go to hell. Where is the love of Christ in all of that? Where is the love of Christ when he told the theif on