My husband's desire to go to seminary

[Dorothea]

Hello, all. You remember (maybe lol) that I'd mentioned my husband had an interest in becoming a priest, and then decided he would try for deacon. The reason this has been difficult for him and me is because of several reasons. We wanted to get to Colorado to retire here ever since I met him I wanted to come back here and live the rest of our lives. He agreed. We bought a house in which to stay for the next several years so our boys could have a stable place to live until they were old enough (late teens or after high school) that we could decide to do something about the priest ambitions at that time.

Continuing on this point, because of the children, because of his having to go to MA to go to Holy Cross (if he can do so), we were caught with two decisions, and neither were very palatable to me, and made me feel uneasy and unsure. He was a bit concerned as well. Moving our children again and to an expensive place. I would need to hurry up and finish up my med. transcription course and be working by whenever that time is that this should happen. Someone told us there are apartments on the seminary grounds that house the students and probably their families. I don't know, but there's the money issues. The other option was he was going to go by himself for those 4 years and just be home when he was out of school, and that really didn't sound good to me.

So, my husband is eligible to retire from the military any time now. But he was going to get a job while on terminal leave so that he had one before he got out technically. Then he was going to pursue deacon because then we could stay in the area. This seemed like a good plan....

Well, the more he's been serving with Father and talking with him, and studying up on Orthodoxy, and going to the services, the more compelled he feels about going to seminary to be a priest. I think he feels strongly that it's his calling.

My problem is that I'm kinda afraid. I feel uneasy about moving and changing our lives, and how we will survive if he does decide to go, and the boys and their schooling. The other half of me is thrilled that he wants to become a priest and it's wonderful. Ugh.

I told him we'll need to pray on this, and we'll eventually get the answer, on what path we need to go, whatever it is. I ask for your prayers, please, to help us in this. We've got probably about a year or less....that my hubby wants to get out of the Air Force all together...he was talking by next spring or so. I don't know what's going to happen. And I hate to think all this worrying is maybe getting in the way of his calling. I don't want to cause problems, you know? So, I will be praying, and he said he would continue to talk to Father Dennis about it. I hope and pray God's will will be done, and we can find peace in this decision. Thanks in advance for reading my long post and for whatever prayers you are able to spare for us.

[Matrona]

May you find God's will for your family! :crosseo:

The seminary program at HC is four years? Yikes. Maybe your husband could go alone for the first year while you and the children take your time moving.

[JustinHesychast]

Lord, have mercy. May it all be according only to His will.

You have my prayers.

[Philothei]

Hey Dorthea:) ... What's up? oh well.. You pretty much know when you are called...And if he is called that's it pretty much your life has ended ....(just kidding ya) as you know it. I have been through that whole process... it is a big cross you carry daily... but also a great blessings and a calling from God above all...

You will be in my prayers. Boston is a beautiful city BTW and you will not want to leave when he graduates... trust me. The "Holy Cross" family is very welcoming and the Chapel is small and sweet :) I still miss it...

For now I would just keep you in my prayers. if you need anything please pm to me...if you have any questions.

[Anhelyna]

Dorothea

If he is meant to be a priest it will happen :) God's plans have a habit of working out.

Prayers for you and your family during this time of discernment

[Michael the Iconographer]

May you find God's will for your family! :crosseo:

The seminary program at HC is four years? Yikes. Maybe your husband could go alone for the first year while you and the children take your time moving.

That is not practical. Separation of that type while moving, especially for that long will create untold stress upon her family. I know this from personal experience.

[rainbowbright]

You mean you'd rather stay in this phony little town than go to Boston?:P
I'll go to Boston for you.
Prayers

[Khaleas]

I can understand your reluctance to move again after finally gotten some roots down after military life. Still, kids are incredibly adaptive too.
I'll pray that you come to a good solution in this. Can definitely see the pros and cons on both sides of the fence.

[Michael the Iconographer]

I can understand your reluctance to move again after finally gotten some roots down after military life. Still, kids are incredibly adaptive too.
I'll pray that you come to a good solution in this. Can definitely see the pros and cons on both sides of the fence.

Fence sitter!!!

(Sorry, I could not resist.)

OK, back to topic...

[Dorothea]

Thanks all. Yes, I feel I'm being selfish because I've waited 13 years to come back here and settle for life, and hubs agreed once we visited here on our way up to WA when we were stationed there. This is my favorite state to live in, and after all the moving I've done (both with my husband and the many, many moves with my dad and our family when he was in the air force for 30 years), moving is becoming less and less attractive, and I'm thinking priests and their families are moved where there are openings and where they are needed. It reminds me of the military life in a way. Ugh.

Rainbow, sure Boston is nice, but I don't care for the climate, and the schools there are outrageously expensive, I've been told, and right now, my boys are in a private school (will be in a few weeks). The political reasons aren't that important. :blush: Anyway, so I feel kinda like I'm being selfish, but at the same time, we worked hard to get here to retire....he did the year tour in Korea just so we could come here and retire and spend the rest of our lives here.

Khaleas, I know that children adapt pretty easily. I suppose I did growing up moving every 2-4 years, but I was a shy child, so it was a bit difficult meeting friends. Usually a year after being in a place, I'd have some friends, and then a year or two later, we'd move.

If it weren't for the move to Boston, the money, and all that, I'd be so thrilled about his calling. I am, really. After all we've been through the past 11 years, this is a blessing for him and I, imo. But, I will continue to pray on this and God will lead us, and hopefully, He'll also give me peace in whatever decision is made, because that's what I really need, peace.

[Dorothea]

Of course, the other issue is whether he'll be accepted by Bishop Isaiah to go to seminary and become a priest. That's something that needs to be figured out first.

[Khaleas]

I'm pretty shy around new people even now as an adult so it took me a while to get used to things and make friends. Fortunately I enjoy the peace and quiet of being alone too.
I thought I was going to enjoy the moving factor more but now when it looks like we've got three more years left, we're staying put and maybe staying put even after that...
Right now I'm more looking forward to a bit more land and some chickens... ;)

[Andrew21091]

Holy Cross has a very beautiful campus and Boston is a wonderful city and I hope to go to college there aswell. I'd say you should follow God's will. My SF has told me that it is a true calling from God and you should do everything you can to follow God's will. If going all the way to Boston is too much a problem, has your husband thought at all about the other seminaries in the US such as St. Tikhon's or St. Vlad's?

By the way, the Master's of Divinity program is three years I believe.

[Michael the Iconographer]

I'm pretty shy around new people even now as an adult so it took me a while to get used to things and make friends. Fortunately I enjoy the peace and quiet of being alone too.
I thought I was going to enjoy the moving factor more but now when it looks like we've got three more years left, we're staying put and maybe staying put even after that...
Right now I'm more looking forward to a bit more land and some chickens... ;)

YOU, shy arround new people? I guess me and the fiance were not new people when you met us! ;)

[Dorothea]

Well, just to give you all a short update on the priesthood issue with my hubs. He talked with our spiritual father after Paraklasis this evening (that would be Fr. Dennis) :) Father told him there was no rush and to just about studying, coming to the services, learning more. He and his family have been busy moving around for many years. He's got 3 other souls to think about. Take time to relax and be with them since hubs had been in Korea and other tdy's in the past, and the separations were difficult. This vacation in RMNP was the first family vacation for us. He said to hubs to take the time to be with family and pray on it and just keep doing what he was doing. I was happy to hear this. Because I thought it would be best once the boys were older or out of school. But hubs was worried about being too old. I told him there are many priests that are older than 40, so I didn't see the problem. But anyway, hubs will be taking a few courses at the local community college to finish up his degree in project management so that he will be ready for an outside job (or as my priest said, "just finish up your military career and then work on getting a secular job and then go from there) next year. A few years won't make too much difference, said Father. :) He said what hubs had to realize is that he isn't the only one that has to sign the papers when he gets ordained...so does the wife to say she's along for the ride as well. I mean there's a responsibility in being a priest's wife (presbytera) as well. :) So, I feel more at ease now. We shall see what comes about.

[Thekla]

prayers for you both/all !

(I think you'd make a great Presbytera :) )

[Dorothea]

prayers for you both/all !

(I think you'd make a great Presbytera :) )
Aww, thanks, Thekla. I'd be happy to be a deacon's wife just as much. :P

[Chocolatesa]

:crosseo: