GerTzedek
2nd September 2007, 08:03 PM
swiped from Tikkun Ministries International...
A young scholar from New York was invited to become Rabbi in a small old community in Chicago. On his very first Shabbat, a hot debate erupted as to whether one should or should not stand during the reading of the Ten Commandments.
Next day, the rabbi visited 98 year-old Mr. Katz in the nursing home. "Mr. Katz, I'm asking you as the oldest member of the community," said the rabbi, "what is our synagogue's custom during the reading of the Ten Commandments?"
"Why do you ask?" asked Mr. Katz.
"Yesterday we read the Ten Commandments. Some people stood, some people sat. The ones standing started screaming at the ones sitting, telling them to stand up. The ones sitting started screaming at the ones standing, telling them to sit down... "
"That," said the old man "is our custom."
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
One Shabbat a man spilled grape juice on his talit.
The very next day he brought it to the cleaners. When the time came to pick it up, he was stunned see the bill for $50.
"Fifty dollars!" he shouted. "To clean one little talit?"
"Do you have any idea how long it took me to get out all those little knots!" the dry-cleaner replied.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
A man called his mother in Florida. He said to his mother, "How are you doing?"
She said, "not too good. I've been very weak."
The son then asked, "Why are you so weak?"
She said, "Because I haven't eaten in 38 days."
The son then asked, "How come you haven't eaten in 38 days?"
She said, "Because I didn't want my mouth to be filled with food when you called."
A young scholar from New York was invited to become Rabbi in a small old community in Chicago. On his very first Shabbat, a hot debate erupted as to whether one should or should not stand during the reading of the Ten Commandments.
Next day, the rabbi visited 98 year-old Mr. Katz in the nursing home. "Mr. Katz, I'm asking you as the oldest member of the community," said the rabbi, "what is our synagogue's custom during the reading of the Ten Commandments?"
"Why do you ask?" asked Mr. Katz.
"Yesterday we read the Ten Commandments. Some people stood, some people sat. The ones standing started screaming at the ones sitting, telling them to stand up. The ones sitting started screaming at the ones standing, telling them to sit down... "
"That," said the old man "is our custom."
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
One Shabbat a man spilled grape juice on his talit.
The very next day he brought it to the cleaners. When the time came to pick it up, he was stunned see the bill for $50.
"Fifty dollars!" he shouted. "To clean one little talit?"
"Do you have any idea how long it took me to get out all those little knots!" the dry-cleaner replied.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
A man called his mother in Florida. He said to his mother, "How are you doing?"
She said, "not too good. I've been very weak."
The son then asked, "Why are you so weak?"
She said, "Because I haven't eaten in 38 days."
The son then asked, "How come you haven't eaten in 38 days?"
She said, "Because I didn't want my mouth to be filled with food when you called."