What do I do now?

[JoyToTheWhirled]

Ok, this might not make a lot of sense, but it's something I'd really appreciate any input about it.

I'm part of a very traditional church, which loves the Word of God, and they are wonderful. I've barely been able to coast along in the past few years, I have huge joint pain and trouble walking. Our church has been a 'safe place', and I really feel that it's where the Lord has placed me.

But in the past few weeks, I've started to feel really stirred in my spirit to pursue God, and I've just been so aware of how much I try to do in my own strength. It's almost like I don't treat the bible like a supernatural book - it's more of an instruction manual that I try and follow, but it's like it's all me.

I've been convicted that I'm just not being filled with His Spirit like I'm supposed to be, but I'm scared because my husband is very anti-charismatic, and even though I can feel something bubbling up in my chest, I keep biting it back because he will be horrified and mocking.

I'm deliberately trying to step out of being in such a critical mindset. I used to read a lot of 'discernment' websites - and really, I realized that what they meant as 'discernment' was actually just 'skepticism', and I wanted to have a faith-filled heart, not a doubting one.

Anyway, congratulations if you've got to the end of that ramble - if anyone has any advice, I'd be very grateful.:confused: :help:

[geetrue]

I've been afraid to stand up to people on the street when witnessing to them in the past.

They say, "Oh your God causes all of the wars in the world" or if I try to share Jesus with a tract one said, "Don't insult my intelligence"

My own son refuses to let me bring a bible into his house and even got mad at his little 7 year old girl for praying in front of him.

So I can feel some of your pain ... the church you go to doesn't sound bad, with a love for the Word of God, but the fear of what your husband thinks is a concern for me.

I'll be praying for God to show you the way and to heal those joints too. Your too young to have that problem for the est of your life.

God doesn't do anything without prayer ... if He did it wouldn't bring glory to His name.

Plus when the Holy Spirit comes upon you ... you will have boldness and confidence to share the truth that is in you.

God bless you JoyToTheWhirled

Your problem is now in the hands of the Lord

[Tamara224]

Hi Joy.

There aren't any pat answers to help you on this. But I think we've all struggled with similar at times. At least, I have. I tend to be a very "left-brained" analytical, think-it-through kind of person. So, I have a very hard time letting God "do" spiritual things with me. On two occassions at church I felt the Holy Spirit prompting me to give a word of prophecy to the Body... but I resisted and did not do it. The HS gave it to someone else instead. And I was the one who missed out. The reason I resisted is because I questioned "Is this really from God" and I felt scared and foolish in stepping out.

At various points in momentous ways and every day in small ways, God asks us to make a decision to trust Him and obey Him in the face of our own foolishness. It's very difficult.

But there is always hope!! God hears our prayers in all things. It may not come immediately, but God does answer our prayers.... If you lack wisdom, ask for it. If you lack courage, ask for it. If you lack faith, ask for it. If you lack humility, ask for it (this is a scary one!). These are the things God gladly gives. You are already showing evidence of God's desire to give them to you because you are, as you say, convicted of it. So, now that God has shown you what he wants for you, and you have realized you want it too... The only thing left is to ask and receive.

I've found that my spiritual growth has much much more to do with God than with me.

"...being confident of this, that he who began a good work in you will carry it on to completion until the day of Christ Jesus."

God began the good work and God will finish it, one day at a time.

[zaksmummy]

Just keep praying:)

I was filled with the Holy spirit when I was a teenager, last year returned to church after a ten year gap. We were attending a FIEC church, not charismatic or anything.

I know what you mean about being stirred in your spirit, I've felt like this to for a number of months. Since christmas I was praying as I wanted to speak in tongues again to praise God, but I just couldnt do it , it wouldnt come out of my mouth.

A couple of weeks ago we went back to a church which was charismatic, that we attended years ago, and then it just happened. I was singing and concentrating on God and then singing in tongues. It was a wonderful release.

I've thought about it a lot since, and how I used to prophesy before I stopped going to church and I realised that we just have to be open to God and what he wants to do with us.

A scripture for your husband Romans 8v1

Therefore there is no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus because through Christ Jesus the law of the Spirit of life set me free from the law of sin and death

Catrin xx

[JoyToTheWhirled]

:) Thanks everyone for your helpful replies. It's difficult because I'm trying to come out of this 'left-brain' thing, but trying also not to shut my mind off - I guess it's fear, really.

I think I'm coming to the realization that I just have to surrender and trust - God is good, and if I ask Him to fill me with His Spirit, it might be new, but it's never going to be bad for me.

Thankyou so much for hearing me everyone, means a lot - no-one else to speak to, really!:prayer:

[geetrue]

Keep us informed we care ... were just arguing about what charismatic means
and wondering what kind of icon we should display.

Misewell love someone in the process ... be blessed. :thumbsup:

[jeolmstead]

I can't really add much to what has been said, except that I said a prayer for you.....

John O.

[JoyToTheWhirled]

So, I set apart some time yesterday to really seek God about all this, I surrender to Him, and I even begin speaking in tongues. It was awesome, a real tangible sense of His presence.

Only then, my whole house erupts in arguments, there's lots of tears and by the end of it, I'm wondering if I just made it all up and I haven't been filled with His Spirit at all.:scratch: :(

If nothing else, it has reminded me of how dependant I am on His grace...:sigh:

[TasManOfGod]

So, I set apart some time yesterday to really seek God about all this, I surrender to Him, and I even begin speaking in tongues. It was awesome, a real tangible sense of His presence.

Only then, my whole house erupts in arguments, there's lots of tears and by the end of it, I'm wondering if I just made it all up and I haven't been filled with His Spirit at all.:scratch: :(

If nothing else, it has reminded me of how dependant I am on His grace...:sigh:
Praise the Lord

[geetrue]

So, I set apart some time yesterday to really seek God about all this, I surrender to Him, and I even begin speaking in tongues. It was awesome, a real tangible sense of His presence.

Only then, my whole house erupts in arguments, there's lots of tears and by the end of it, I'm wondering if I just made it all up and I haven't been filled with His Spirit at all.:scratch: :(

If nothing else, it has reminded me of how dependant I am on His grace...:sigh:

This is just a sign that you are going through a great battle. If God be for you who can be against you.

God has manifested in your life and the hinderer doesn't like it ... that's the real name of the evil one. The hinderer ... he is a hinderence to our ability to understand and comprehend.

This has happened to me before, a sign from God and then I wondered if it was really Him.

You will win this battle and face many more on your way to heaven. Now pray for your whole family to be saved, for them to live in harmony with the Lord.

Acts 2:38-39

38 Then Peter said to them, “Repent, and let every one of you be baptized in the name of Jesus Christ for the remission of sins; and you shall receive the gift of the Holy Spirit. 39 For the promise is to you and to your children, and to all who are afar off, as many as the Lord our God will call.”

[Brucea]

Keeping praying in the Spirit! After the dust settle from the battle you will find growth has taken place!

In the end it is worth it! keep on standing. We serve a faithful God and He cares about you so much!

God bless Bruce A

[Mommy3girls1boy]

Joy

I am praying for you. I understand your physical pain as I too have problems walking and have joint pain in various places in my body. I refuse to accept the diagnosis I have receive. The Lord is my Healer and He has healed me through His stripes in Jesus name. He took stripes for your healing as well.

I pray that your husband will be understanding and willing to learn about the Holy Spirit and the baptism of the Holy Spirit. Just allow the Holy Spirit to move in your life. :prayer:

[heron]

Some ideas of things you can do --

1. If you can get alone sometimes, set aside these times to
be yourself in worship, and not think about how others
impact your relationship with God.

2. Read the Bible out loud. Pray for people and your own situations while you are reading out loud, tying together what needs you see and feel, with what God's heart is for us.

3. Sing to God. Whatever comes to you. Get out an old hymnal, sing what you remember, make up tunes to Bible verses, or just sing what comes out of your mouth in prayer.

4. Assign yourself a job, of praying for several people. This could be missionaries or friends, schools or governments, celebrities or impoverished people... anyone. But just see yourself in the role of responsibility... see your prayers as a needed part of others' solutions.

5. If you can't get out much, invite people in! Grab a few friends that you respect for their spirituality and depth, and start an informal prayer/Bible study group.

These aren't solutions, but practical ideas to keep that sensation alive and productive. Ask God what comes next!

[geetrue]

Some ideas of things you can do --

Ask God what comes next!

Speaks to me big time ... I feel like I'm on the edge of a major break through.

Thanks for the other suggestions too ... :thumbsup:

[JoyToTheWhirled]

Thankyou so much for the further advice everyone! Right now I'm in a place where I can't stop crying when I sing hymns, because the reality of salvation has just hit me square in the chest - almost like it's the first time I've known it, everytime I sing :)

[geetrue]

Thankyou so much for the further advice everyone! Right now I'm in a place where I can't stop crying when I sing hymns, because the reality of salvation has just hit me square in the chest - almost like it's the first time I've known it, everytime I sing :)


That's because His name is Holy ... yes siree He's dealing with you now.

Deal with all of us, Lord ... I don't like being luke warm. :help:

[hopeinGod]

I too have trouble due to inflammation in my body, and have found a few supplemental products that help relieve the pain.

First. try taking systemic enzymes. Neprinol is a brand that I like. It's not cheap, but for those of us who suffer with inflammation-related pain, it will bring relief.

Or, you might try one of the OTC joint meds. One is made of shea nuts, called FlexNow, and should help. Be aware that any product that works as an anti-inflammatory can cause ringing in the ears or other side effects; overall, however, many folks are finding these products to be very beneficial.

Dave