I really need advice from parents here...

[Katydid]

OK so I put this in the parenting forum and I am now even more confused. So I thought that maybe some of you would know considering (I am assuming) that most of you with son's, or most men here, will be circumcised. So here is my post.


OK, my 4 month old son is circumcised. BUT, his doctor did it differently than my other boy. He has extra foreskin left. The doctor at his well baby said that it is fine and he will grow into it. BUT...it was attached to the head, which I was asking her about. She took it and pulled it back and actually made it bleed when she did this. My baby was screaming (no wonder) and I asked her if that was OK. She said it is normal and that I should do this every evening during his bath, but it seemed to hurt him so much. So, my question is this. IS SHE NUTS!!! I mean to hurt him like that. It isn't much foreskin, just a little bit, but it still looks really red where she did that. Then she showed me this white stuff that was built up under it and said that that stuff is why I need to pull it back. She also said it was to prevent it from sealing to the head. I have never heard any of this. I didn't have this problem with my oldest son, I think because he had the plastibell. So now I am confused.

WHAT SHOULD I DO? Should I keep pulling it back? Should I ignore her and just let her do it again next time? I DON'T KNOW!!

[jgonz]

I saw your post in the other forum... From what I've read, you should NOT retract even the little bit of foreskin left by this doctor. I agree with the poster in the other forum who suggested that you by pass your doctor completely and get a urologist's opinion on the situation.

:groupray:

[CovenantRay]

I saw your post in the other forum... From what I've read, you should NOT retract even the little bit of foreskin left by this doctor. I agree with the poster in the other forum who suggested that you by pass your doctor completely and get a urologist's opinion on the situation.

:groupray:
Shalom:

I might add the following advice. Take your son to the nearest "Children's Hospital" and ask them for a urologist appointment. If anyone should know, they should know.

Best wishes for you and your son.

CovenantRay :prayer:

[HadassahSukkot]

I'm not a parent, yet... but I also agree. Go and see a GOOD Jewish pediatrician and a urologist. work with the two of them. sounds like whoever did the circumcision totally botched the job.

Speaking from experience, the doctors are right that if he does have that, that you will have to pull it back to prevent other problems. Yep, painful.. and ick... but if the problem isn't fixed (either by completing the circumcision the RIGHT way, or otherwise) he will have problems in the future. :(

I totally hate it for you!! I wish there was something better.

[Torah]

OK so I put this in the parenting forum and I am now even more confused. So I thought that maybe some of you would know considering (I am assuming) that most of you with son's, or most men here, will be circumcised. So here is my post.


OK, my 4 month old son is circumcised. BUT, his doctor did it differently than my other boy. He has extra foreskin left. The doctor at his well baby said that it is fine and he will grow into it. BUT...it was attached to the head, which I was asking her about. She took it and pulled it back and actually made it bleed when she did this. My baby was screaming (no wonder) and I asked her if that was OK. She said it is normal and that I should do this every evening during his bath, but it seemed to hurt him so much. So, my question is this. IS SHE NUTS!!! I mean to hurt him like that. It isn't much foreskin, just a little bit, but it still looks really red where she did that. Then she showed me this white stuff that was built up under it and said that that stuff is why I need to pull it back. She also said it was to prevent it from sealing to the head. I have never heard any of this. I didn't have this problem with my oldest son, I think because he had the plastibell. So now I am confused.

WHAT SHOULD I DO? Should I keep pulling it back? Should I ignore her and just let her do it again next time? I DON'T KNOW!!
I agree with CovenantRay & antsinmypants ,Go and see a GOOD Jewish pediatrician and a urologist. work with the two of them. sounds like whoever did the circumcision totally botched the job.

Shalom

[Liorah]

At ther very least see another pediatrician. Why the need to emphasize " Jewish" and "totally botched the job"?:confused:

[Katydid]

Oh, I forgot to update here. I talked to an RN who works in the field. She explained WHY I need to do this. It is so it doesn't attach to the head. She also explained that I need to put vaseline on there to keep it from sticking again. She stated that if it attaches to the wrong spot, then he may need surgery to fix it.

[Bon]

Oh, That just doesn't sound right Katy!!!

My son was circumcised and there were no post surgery problems of any kind.
The foreskin was competely removed, bar a tiny little bit of bunching (if ya know what I mean) I guess that is so it doesnt become too tight..when ....uh......um.......you know!!!!!!!!! ...eventually! :blush:

I would take the advice of all the other's here and get a second professional oppinion.

Bon

[HadassahSukkot]

At ther very least see another pediatrician. Why the need to emphasize " Jewish" and "totally botched the job"?:confused:

1. Typically you will find a more sympathetic ear, not to mention will have the understanding and sympathies to understand WHY this is such an important thing other than "religiously".

2. Circumcision involves TOTALLY removing the "covering" over the head. This wasn't done in this case.

Trust me, if you can't "move" without it causing difficulties, you've already got a "difficulty".


Sorry if that caused any offense or anything, but trust me typically a Jewish doctor will have the lighbulb come on lots faster and find ways to help more than the typical non jewish doctor who doesn't understand the biblical and physical need.


My fiance's parents 'fell down on the job' when it came to keeping covenant and we're dealing with this issue at THIS juncture of his life (26 yrs old) and we're trying to find a way of getting a doctor to take care of it without saying it is just a "cosmetic procedure" or "religious necessity" which in Germany means "Insurance doesn't cover it".

Trust me, there are too many issues that are caused by not having it fixed whilst young, and many dangers as well.

You have to go under the knife whilst put to sleep or heavily under narcotics, whereas when young, it is a much simpler procedure... and looked on with a much kinder eye than whilst older.

[P_G]

I concur with my brother Ray and say get this child to a qualified Urologist at a hospital better a childrens hospital better it be a Jewish doctor.

Do it now before this baby gets any older because the older he gets the harder this is going to become.

PG

[Katydid]

Well, due to our insurance, we are limited in where we can take him. BUT, we have set up an appointment (the earliest we could get was august 2) with a different doctor who I will be discussing this with. This doctor is the one we usually see, and she is really good about listening to a parents concerns. So I hope she will be open to putting a referral in for him to a pediatric urologist.

[schwartmrs]

My husband drew this to my attention, so I hope you don't mind if I add a comment.

First off, what the doc did wasn't very kind...okay, so maybe she felt that was what was needed...and maybe it was...but...there are analgesics she could have used...topical lidocaine comes to mind. So, if it was me, I'd reconsider taking my kids to her. Seems lacking in compassion to my mind.

Secondly, it's natural for it to be red now. It's been injured, and has everything in common with other types of injured flesh. One of the most important of those things is that now it's injured, it's open to infection. Now that she's done what she has, you really have no choice...it must be kept clean to avoid infection, and that area underneath is a breeding ground for bacteria. Over time, it should become more comfortable for your son for you to do this...as the injury heals. Best thing to use (old mom lady's opinion here) is baby bath...mixed with water in a very weak solution...applied with a swab early on in the bathtime, and soaked clean in the tub.

As to the vaseline, it actually has 4 benefits. It will keep the flesh from reattaching like your RN said. Also, it provides a barrier against bacteria entering that environment in the first place...not a perfect barrier, but a decent one. Thirdly, it provides a medium in which bacteria are reluctant to grow...so if there are bacteria, they shouldn't grow quickly enough between baths to cause a problem. Lastly, it provides lubrication...let's face it....this is tissue that is totally unaccustomed to any kind of abrasion or friction...and suddenly, it's expected to put up with all this...the vaseline will help it adjust to these changes, and most likely will keep you from having an extremely cranky baby.

One last thing...after the bath, you'll have to go thru the same procedure to dry the area before you apply more vaseline. Avoid fibrous materials when drying it...this includes toilet paper, paper towels, cotton balls, swabs and tissues...you really do NOT want to risk leaving fibers behind. I would also, frankly, avoid towels...they're too abrasive. My advice is to use a scrap of clean t-shirt material, silk, or a soft, clean cotton hanky. Then, apply the vaseline with a swab....be generous, it'll be easier on both of you if you use too much rather than too little.

Regardless of whether you see a Jewish doctor, urologist, pediatrician...in a clinic, private practice, or children's hospital...if you do not get a sympathetic ear and a solution to your problem, try again somewhere else....again and again, if necessary.

Blessings,

Shade

[ContraMundum]

See a doctor.

Don't consult the internet forums.

[Katydid]

See a doctor.

Don't consult the internet forums.



Just so you understand, I don't in any way use what is said on a forum as medical information. I use it to see if others have experienced this and perhaps have suggestions. See, I am a military dependant and it isn't easy to just "see a doctor" when you have already been seen.

I can't just walk him into any clinic or hospital and see any doctor I want. I have to use the doctor that they assign me to. There is a whole bunch of stuff you have to go through to get a second opinion and if there were enough parents who had been through this and agreed with the doctor I saw, then I would probably be less likely to fight the system. As it stands, I have already started working the system to get him into another doctor (Not his PCM) which is really not easy to do. At least not here.

If everyone would have said that this is normal, I would have probably just followed up at his next well-baby and tried to make that one with a different doctor. Instead, I have made an appointment to get a second opinion.

[ContraMundum]

Just so you understand, I don't in any way use what is said on a forum as medical information. I use it to see if others have experienced this and perhaps have suggestions. See, I am a military dependant and it isn't easy to just "see a doctor" when you have already been seen.

I can't just walk him into any clinic or hospital and see any doctor I want. I have to use the doctor that they assign me to. There is a whole bunch of stuff you have to go through to get a second opinion and if there were enough parents who had been through this and agreed with the doctor I saw, then I would probably be less likely to fight the system. As it stands, I have already started working the system to get him into another doctor (Not his PCM) which is really not easy to do. At least not here.

If everyone would have said that this is normal, I would have probably just followed up at his next well-baby and tried to make that one with a different doctor. Instead, I have made an appointment to get a second opinion.

OK...I'd forgotten you live in a country where medical care is complicated and often difficult to get. Sorry. My prayers are with you. I hope it all works out.

[HadassahSukkot]

Just so you understand, I don't in any way use what is said on a forum as medical information. I use it to see if others have experienced this and perhaps have suggestions. See, I am a military dependant and it isn't easy to just "see a doctor" when you have already been seen.

I can't just walk him into any clinic or hospital and see any doctor I want. I have to use the doctor that they assign me to. There is a whole bunch of stuff you have to go through to get a second opinion and if there were enough parents who had been through this and agreed with the doctor I saw, then I would probably be less likely to fight the system. As it stands, I have already started working the system to get him into another doctor (Not his PCM) which is really not easy to do. At least not here.

If everyone would have said that this is normal, I would have probably just followed up at his next well-baby and tried to make that one with a different doctor. Instead, I have made an appointment to get a second opinion.
Oy ya yoy, didn't realize you guys were a military fam.

Grew up navy for 17 years.

In this case, you will need to stress that you want this taken care of not just for religious reasons, in that you are bound to the military doctors... or as my mom called them "Military veterinarians".

Some are good, some not so good. I feel your pain and know exactly of what you speak!
Will be praying extra hard.

[hadara]

Sue the doctor.

I didn't get my son circumcised, and he experiences so many problems. Doctors do botch even circumcisions -we had a little baby here whose whole penis was burnt because of a "new" circumcision technique. He then left the country. (the doctor, that is)

hadara

[Katydid]

Sue the doctor.


Another one of the joys of being military. I am not able to sue the Federal Government, so I can't sue the doctor.

[Wags]

Wow - sounds like you didn't get very good follow-up instructions! We were told to put the vaseline on right at the start.

I agree about not using a towel to dry the area - I use a blow dryer set on low to dry my son. As long as you don't hold it too close and keep it moving it does a great job. I use it on his tuchas when he gets a diaper rash too. Really helps to clear up the rash, and its a good way to make sure all those folds of skin on his chubby legs, and groin get compeletly dry. I also dry his hair and ears with it - had a nurse practioner tell me it cuts down on ear infections and so far neither of my kids have had one (I'm prone to them due to ear canals that retain water.)

I was really paranoid after my sons circ and was constantly asking the doctor if everything was okay. (A friend's son had a botched cric and will have to get additonal surgery when he is older) I also was concerned about the size and shape before the circ much to the doctors amusment - but I didn't have any experience with baby boys to know what was normal. :blush:

It certainly won't hurt to get a second opinion if you can.

[visionary]

Oh... am I glad I had girls... I feel your pain...I mean your little one's pain. HOpe things clear up.. May the Lord open up a path to righteousnss in your case. May His Will be performed as it should be and everything heals ok.