Rant: Meeting with my pastor / What is this church coming to?

[Music4Hym777]

Okay, so I sort of had an informal meeting with the pastor of my church (my ex-fiance's father). It did not go well at all.

Many of you know I have had seminary on my mind for the past few years. Really 8th grade was when I first felt the call to ordained ministry. So as I am planning on graduating from college in Dec '07, I decided to talk to Steve and see what all I should do.

I felt about two inches tall coming out of the meeting. Oh my gosh! He said that because of my physical disability and my past that I probably couldn't get through candidacy. He put a big emphasis on my disability. When and where in the Bible has God not chosen to use those that are disabled? Is it my fault that I have turned Cerebral Palsy into something that I consider a blessing. I was shocked to find out two years ago that I had severe arthritis in my foot. I have had to have two surgeries on it to help with the pain and to take care of it.....but is that so wrong?

Another thing that he brought up was my GPA. I can see where this could come into concern as my GPA is not the greatest, but its not awful either. If I would not have had my meningitis vaccination, I may not be around today as I had all the symptoms of the disease that my pastors nephew died from 15 months ago. As each semester progresses I have been improving greatly! If I keep going the way that I am, I could very well wind up graduating with honors if not very close to it....

The third thing he talked about was my mental health and my history of my eating disorder. However that seems like a lifetime ago. Its been over 20 months since my last purge and the only time that I even relapsed in the slightest was when the doctor told me to take a laxative if the percocet (post-op) was not working. (I cried my eyes out for a few days after that one)

In a church that is going down hill, where we dont have enough pastors, you would think that they would be begging people who are feeling the call to come in. So why do I feel like I shouldn't even apply?

Okay, thanks for letting me rant!

[Jim47]

The only advice I can offer is to speak to another Pastor. Perhaps your past relationship with his son is coming between the two of you.

Maybe you could talk to the WELS? :hug:

[Music4Hym777]

The only advice I can offer is to speak to another Pastor. Perhaps your past relationship with his son is coming between the two of you.

Maybe you could talk to the WELS? :hug:
Oh yes, Jim. Lets talk to the WELS! Thats really gonna work as I am a WOMAN wanting to go into ordained ministry!!!

I mean if a male who was once an alcoholic wanted to become a pastor and he now had arthritis, would they feel the same way?

[LilLamb219]

Perhaps he was trying to save you the pain of being rejected for candidacy? I don't know if he was specifically trying to hurt your feelings or if he was just telling the truth as he saw it. Think of the conversation and try to put yourself in his shoes and determine if he was being objective.

[Jim47]

Oh yes, Jim. Lets talk to the WELS! Thats really gonna work as I am a WOMAN wanting to go into ordained ministry!!!

I mean if a male who was once an alcoholic wanted to become a pastor and he now had arthritis, would they feel the same way?


Me sorry! That was just a feeble attempt at humor. You know that I do care right?

By the way, are you getting any relief from pain yet? I pray that God stands beside you in all of this. :prayer:

[Music4Hym777]

Me sorry! That was just a feeble attempt at humor. You know that I do care right?

By the way, are you getting any relief from pain yet? I pray that God stands beside you in all of this. :prayer:

And that was my attempt to be sarcastic back....its very hard to be smart alecky over a message board though.....of course I know you care

My pain is getting better. I am still in a cast and on crutches but I have 2 more weeks until I just have to wear a brace! YAY! So thats pretty exciting.

Perhaps he was trying to save you the pain of being rejected for candidacy? I don't know if he was specifically trying to hurt your feelings or if he was just telling the truth as he saw it. Think of the conversation and try to put yourself in his shoes and determine if he was being objective. I can see where he would have doubts but that is because I dont see him as much anymore. He only really sees me during the summers and when my ex-fiance and I were together he would see me at holiday events. I just dont think he really knows me too much anymore. If my ex-fiance told me that I couldn't do it, then I might listen to him more because he has seen me through everything.

[kiwimac]

Talk with a disinterested other. Perhaps you might consider talking with an Anglican or Baptist or so other, get someone else's 'take' on this.

Kiwimac

[porterross]

Why waste any more time getting opinions from those who do not make the decision concerning your admission? They are not the experts in this matter.

Contact the seminary directly and speak with the registrar's office about getting an idea of those factors that might actually affect your acceptance. I can't imagine that any disability would be a hindrance to your education and desire to serve God. That's just ludicrous.

Don't let someone else's prejudices limit your desire of fulfilling your dream of service to God. None of is without things that could hinder our progression in life, some of us are merely burdened with very visible ones.

You know whom to look to for guidance....:prayer:

[Chemnitz]

With all due respect, maybe your pastor is right.:holy:

[LilLamb219]

I'm curious why you don't go try a deaconess program?

[judaica]

Okay, so I sort of had an informal meeting with the pastor of my church (my ex-fiance's father). It did not go well at all.

Many of you know I have had seminary on my mind for the past few years. Really 8th grade was when I first felt the call to ordained ministry. So as I am planning on graduating from college in Dec '07, I decided to talk to Steve and see what all I should do.

I felt about two inches tall coming out of the meeting. Oh my gosh! He said that because of my physical disability and my past that I probably couldn't get through candidacy. He put a big emphasis on my disability. When and where in the Bible has God not chosen to use those that are disabled? Is it my fault that I have turned Cerebral Palsy into something that I consider a blessing. I was shocked to find out two years ago that I had severe arthritis in my foot. I have had to have two surgeries on it to help with the pain and to take care of it.....but is that so wrong?

Another thing that he brought up was my GPA. I can see where this could come into concern as my GPA is not the greatest, but its not awful either. If I would not have had my meningitis vaccination, I may not be around today as I had all the symptoms of the disease that my pastors nephew died from 15 months ago. As each semester progresses I have been improving greatly! If I keep going the way that I am, I could very well wind up graduating with honors if not very close to it....

The third thing he talked about was my mental health and my history of my eating disorder. However that seems like a lifetime ago. Its been over 20 months since my last purge and the only time that I even relapsed in the slightest was when the doctor told me to take a laxative if the percocet (post-op) was not working. (I cried my eyes out for a few days after that one)

In a church that is going down hill, where we dont have enough pastors, you would think that they would be begging people who are feeling the call to come in. So why do I feel like I shouldn't even apply?

Okay, thanks for letting me rant!

None of those things you mentioned will affect your call to the ministry I can see (unless your mental problems are sociopathic, or something similiar to bipolar disorder ect (note I'm not saying that bipolar individuals cannot go into the ministry, but there are challenges there, that would seem to make it alot harder). The only thing I would be concerned about, is what would take priority in your life. If things are such, that you would have to take leave too often, then that would be a problem (The church I last attended had a pastor who himself had alot of personal issues going on, and it kept him away too often and he eventually had to move onto other things than the pastorate).

Often times people with the greatest struggles make the best leaders ect. because they are more equipped to not only understand those who go through similiar circumstances, but those who have any sort of difficulties at all.

Judaica

[RayJGentry]

well, i'm guessing you're ELCA, and i have some experience talking with seminary recruiters and admissions people. the head pastor of your home church has to recommend you for candidacy, so if you feel your relationship with him is biased, you may need to find a new home church. now this will take a lot of work, but maybe a congregation where you go to college would suit you. right now, this is the main reason i've stayed at my home church.

your mental illness may or may not affect your entry to seminary. the thing to remember is that once you've applied for candidacy, you will go through a lot of interviews, including a mental health evaluation. while the pastor recommending someone for candidacy should take that into account, if you've done well in your recovery and dealing with it, he should leave the ultimate decision up to the seminary. i have MDD and none of the admissions reps told me not to apply simply because of it.

physical disabilities should not be a factor unless it could somehow seriously affect you from accomplishing your ministry. if you want to talk more, my IM handles are in my profile. i can relate a TON from where you're coming from.

[Tetzel]

If you want to minister, go forth and proclaim Christ. Worry about what the officials say later.