Not sure about this either

[onlooker]

I am a Nazarene. My family attends the Nazarene church. My wife doesn't declare to belong to any one particular parish. She has always jumped from church to church before we were married.
Now comes the conflict:
My daughter's best friend's father is the pastor of a Baptist church. She has gone to Awanas there a few times. Now, both she and my wife want to attend services there. My wife's only reasoning is she likes to try different churches.
I told her I'd rather that they didn't, because I have two issues with this:
1.) A very close friend of mine was Baptist. His pastor said something to his wife and him that I found very disturbing to say the least. In fact, my friend said they would never attend a Baptist church again.
2.) I told my wife that our congregation is like our family. We know them, and they know us. There are times when we confide in them and look for support and prayers. I don't see how going from church to church, let alone from one type of parish to another, that anyone could ever develope that kind of closeness and bonding.
Now...what do I do??? Allow them to go to maintain peace here? I don't think it is healty for half the family to go to one church, and the other half to another. Do I attend at least one service with her??
Uuuuggghhhh. Stumped on this one.
I have greatly appreciated everyone's opinions on my other posts on CF.
Thanks, Troy.

[alaurie]

Scripturally, I believe you're the head of your household. Do I think that gives you dictator privilages ...no way! ;) Your biblical command is to cherish your wife as Christ does the Church. I think prayer, prayer, prayer, and more prayer for loving leadership is your answer.

You've indicated you're just beginning your journey back to the Lord, so am I correct in assuming you haven't been in close fellowship with your Nazarene church? If so, why not visit around some, with the goal of your family finding a church home for the very real benefits you listed? Pray for discernment if you decide to visit and stay in scripture and prayer! Realize not all Baptist churches have the type of error your friend described, and not all Wesleyen tradition churches have it all right.

[desert_island_1]

I think it is important that they listen to your opinions on how you feel about this but I also think it would be a good idea to see if there are any other reasons that they want to look at this new church. Maybe it would be a good idea to write down all the pros and cons of each scenerio (all change, half at one church, all stay) on a piece of paper? Then you can visually see the options (I know that always helps me)

Kristy

[DesertedRose]

2.) I told my wife that our congregation is like our family. We know them, and they know us. There are times when we confide in them and look for support and prayers. I don't see how going from church to church, let alone from one type of parish to another, that anyone could ever develope that kind of closeness and bonding.


I would lovingly ask if she is concerned about/afraid of getting too close to people. She may be trying to avoid the closeness and bonding you speak of on purpose.

I know I did, after I went through an experience when I was rather traumatized by several people in a congregation. Christians often shoot their wounded. Perhaps there's a past experience she hasn't shared with you.

[HeatherJay]

I know several couples who attend different churches....or split their time between two different congregations. There families are perfectly healthy. It's not always a bad thing. :)

And as for your daughter...you know I grew up all my life in a Baptist church. Until I turned 15. Then, I wanted to be where my friends were. I wanted to be in youth group with them. That just happened to be in a United Methodist Church. The best thing my grandmother ever did for my spiritual welfare was to let me go...even though she continued on in the Baptist church the rest of her days. I was saved there...I found a strong personal relationship with Christ there...and I was surrounded by my best friends who had the same faith as I did and supported me in all the trials and tribulations of growing up from a Christian standpoint. You know, having close friends who can back you up in your faith is priceless. I kid you not when I say this, I and my 4 best friends were the only girls in our graduating class to make it out of my high school with our virtue intacted. We were all in youth group together. A strong, active supportive youth group is such a great asset for a young person. Even if you decide that you and your wife should attend a church together, I think you should seriously, seriously consider letting your daughter find her own place to worship.

And I agree with the earlier post...as much as I love the theology behind the Nazarene church, there are some fantastic baptist churches out there. You might be surprised if you gave it a chance. You know, God loves the Baptists, too. ;)