is this the way a christian should live?

[CrownedInTerror]

hello everyone, im not sure if im posting this in the right section but i didnt want it in the teen forums because they dont really post meaningfull threads more like "guess what the person above me ate" type threads. i need real advice.

im 17 and living in nyc in queens. it seems like all the other kids around me that are my age just do whatever they want. they dont care about their parents or family they just wanna have a good time all the time. friends i had when i started highschool now are like dropping out or having to go to special schools because they got kicked out. most people go partying, drinking and smoking weed during the weekends and even the weekdays. i feel like im the weird one here. its not that i dont have friends, i do but a lot of the time i choose not to hang out with them outside of school because i know what they do. a few days ago a girl calls me up at around 11 at night and asks if i wanna go out drinking with her. i had to turn it down because its not really me and i know it wouldnt be right. the girls in my school they dress like real whores, not even an exageration here. they may have boyfriends but they still go around kissing other guys. i dont understand what is going on in the world. is this how normal people should behave or is this just something that goes on in the city? what happened to when hanging out with friends would be just that, not smoking weed and doing other drugs. i feel left out because everyone i know is living this kind of life but i dont want to take part in that kind of stuff. i cant really think of many people who actually get along with their parents, they just leave the house and come home in the middle of the night. what is wrong with people. when did it become so wrong to actually care about your family? on thanksgiving i go to my grandparents with my family while my other friends are having weed parties. im posting this because its to the point now where a lot of the days i dont have anything to do because other people arent doing the right stuff and i just need to hear what other people feel about this

[qpmomma]

Welcome to CF!

Hang in there! It's hard doing the right thing, expecially when you feel like you are the only one. Maybe you could join a youth group at church? Try to find other Christian teens who you can hang out with. They're out there.

God bless you!

Christina

[Prophet01]

be strong in your faith and take your example from Christ himself, christ was called a glutton and a drunkard because he ate and drank with sinners, he came as a light in the darkness

"The people walking in darkness
have seen a great light;
those living in the land of darkness,
a light has dawned."

do not be affriad to mix with these people, respect them as fellow human beings, as gods children, your wayward brothers and sisters - be for them a mirror by which they may see a reflection of christ - "I send you out as sheep among wolves" - do not hide your light under a basket, instead let your light shine before men.

[clayharryman]

In my experience it's easy to fall. If you can remain strong in the association of those who are trying to drag you down, more power to you. I know it's very hard to do, and there are people with whom I will not associate because I know they will drag me down. I am weak in some areas, but strong in others. I stay where I am strong, and let others handle the rest.

I applaud you for your willingness to remain pure in an unpure world. Your strength against the tempter will provide you with great reward on the other side!

[JesusPhreek]

WELCOME!!! I live in Ridgewood, right outside of Bushwick. This is a horrible degraded place...And that means that we have such the chance to advance God's Kingdom!! Be strong in doing what is right, and witness every chance you have. There are places online where you can order tracts, which is a thing that could easily be done as well. Most of all, get active in your church, and you will have something to do :)

Unfortunately Im about to go away for a few weeks, but I will try to see if I can find you again after I get back.

[ghs1994]

Becareful in "mixing" with these people. You may not be strong enough yet. We are commanded to preach the Gospel message, but have nothing to do with unrighteousness. The Gospel message is the power (Romans 1:16), not the person telling it. Only the Gospel message can save souls, not in fancy words. Don't be misled. Evil company corrupts good habits (1 Cor. 15:33). Becareful who you hang out with. Stay away from those who wish to drag you down with them. Remember, you can't save anyone, but the Gospel message can. So just pray for them if you have the chance to present the Gospel message to them. Don't turn anyone away from hearing the message if at first they don't want to hear it, but don't go looking to hang out with someone who wishes for you to do the same things they do.

[Prophet01]

why do you fear satan?

The holy spirit has come to take away our fear of the enemy, dont worry about falling, do you think if your mixing with these people for the reason of right, you will do wrong, if you focus on christ you will not sink, if you take your focus from christ you will, it is good charicter building, and great spiritual training. you will realise your strenghs and weaknesses, but do not be affriad of your weaknesses instead, rejoyce in your weakness because it is through your weakness that you can come to know christ on a deeper level enabeling him to strengen you in your weak areas.

"Immediately Jesus spoke to them. "Have courage! It is I. Don't be afraid." 28 "Lord, if it's You," Peter answered Him, "command me to come to You on the water." 29 "Come!" He said. And climbing out of the boat, Peter started walking on the water and came toward Jesus. 30 But when he saw the strength of the wind, he was afraid. And beginning to sink he cried out, "Lord, save me!" 31 Immediately Jesus reached out His hand, caught hold of him, and said to him, "You of little faith, why did you doubt?"

[clayharryman]

why do you fear satan?

The holy spirit has come to take away our fear of the enemy, dont worry about falling, do you think if your mixing with these people for the reason of right, you will do wrong, if you focus on christ you will not sink, if you take your focus from christ you will, it is good charicter building, and great spiritual training.

Would an earthly army send new recruits into combat without a battle-hardened heirarchy? If they were to do so, that unit would fail quickly. Even a unit with an experienced commander would not survive.

Spiritual warfare is just the same. We are soldiers in a battle against Satan. As such, we should only enter battle with either experience or with an experienced companion. The Spirit can guide us if we allow, but many young Christians do not yet fully allow the Spirit to lead. I am an example.

I ask for temperance before we feed lambs to the lions without the proper experience. After all, we are not alone. If you need help in your battle, you can find it at your church.

In this example, CrownedInTerror, perhaps you could begin entertaining your friends. Host movie nights at your house. Invite a few friends from school and a few from church. Begin to mingle the crowds. Don't start beating anyone over the head with a bible, only show them love. They will wonder why you can be so happy without booze and drugs and sex. Then the door will be opened. Make sure there are experienced friends from church who can guide you until you are comfortable doing this on your own.

[ghs1994]

Would an earthly army send new recruits into combat without a battle-hardened heirarchy? If they were to do so, that unit would fail quickly. Even a unit with an experienced commander would not survive.

Spiritual warfare is just the same. We are soldiers in a battle against Satan. As such, we should only enter battle with either experience or with an experienced companion. The Spirit can guide us if we allow, but many young Christians do not yet fully allow the Spirit to lead. I am an example.

I ask for temperance before we feed lambs to the lions without the proper experience. After all, we are not alone. If you need help in your battle, you can find it at your church.

In this example, CrownedInTerror, perhaps you could begin entertaining your friends. Host movie nights at your house. Invite a few friends from school and a few from church. Begin to mingle the crowds. Don't start beating anyone over the head with a bible, only show them love. They will wonder why you can be so happy without booze and drugs and sex. Then the door will be opened. Make sure there are experienced friends from church who can guide you until you are comfortable doing this on your own.

Amen, my point exactly. I just don't have the patience anymore to try and defend things over and over again to the same person who refuses to see the Word of God for what it is. Good job. :thumbsup:

[LittlePinky82]

You can only be who you are. If it's not your thing than that's cool. You can't make people be like you are or think like you and have the same ways as you. And if partying and all that isn't your thing than that's cool and if the friends you have do respect you as a friend they will understand that and let things be. When you're feeling down about everything try hanging out with some like-minded peers if you already don't.

[LittlePinky82]

I do think it's important to have friends who aren't Christian too. That way you can associate with other people from other walks of life and get to know them and who knows maybe you (orginial poster) can be a personal testimony to people in your group who aren't Christians. When I was in high school I had a good mixture of Christian and non-Christian friends. My non-Christian friends helped me out a lot with life too with coming out of my shyness shell and everything. So sometimes you can learn from each other too. :)

Becareful in "mixing" with these people. You may not be strong enough yet. We are commanded to preach the Gospel message, but have nothing to do with unrighteousness. The Gospel message is the power (Romans 1:16), not the person telling it. Only the Gospel message can save souls, not in fancy words. Don't be misled. Evil company corrupts good habits (1 Cor. 15:33). Becareful who you hang out with. Stay away from those who wish to drag you down with them. Remember, you can't save anyone, but the Gospel message can. So just pray for them if you have the chance to present the Gospel message to them. Don't turn anyone away from hearing the message if at first they don't want to hear it, but don't go looking to hang out with someone who wishes for you to do the same things they do.

[Bill777]

hello everyone, im not sure if im posting this in the right section but i didnt want it in the teen forums because they dont really post meaningfull threads more like "guess what the person above me ate" type threads. i need real advice.

im 17 and living in nyc in queens. it seems like all the other kids around me that are my age just do whatever they want. they dont care about their parents or family they just wanna have a good time all the time. friends i had when i started highschool now are like dropping out or having to go to special schools because they got kicked out. most people go partying, drinking and smoking weed during the weekends and even the weekdays. i feel like im the weird one here. its not that i dont have friends, i do but a lot of the time i choose not to hang out with them outside of school because i know what they do. a few days ago a girl calls me up at around 11 at night and asks if i wanna go out drinking with her. i had to turn it down because its not really me and i know it wouldnt be right. the girls in my school they dress like real whores, not even an exageration here. they may have boyfriends but they still go around kissing other guys. i dont understand what is going on in the world. is this how normal people should behave or is this just something that goes on in the city? what happened to when hanging out with friends would be just that, not smoking weed and doing other drugs. i feel left out because everyone i know is living this kind of life but i dont want to take part in that kind of stuff. i cant really think of many people who actually get along with their parents, they just leave the house and come home in the middle of the night. what is wrong with people. when did it become so wrong to actually care about your family? on thanksgiving i go to my grandparents with my family while my other friends are having weed parties. im posting this because its to the point now where a lot of the days i dont have anything to do because other people arent doing the right stuff and i just need to hear what other people feel about this

This is normal for a christian. We ought not to be unequally yoked like Paul wrote to the Corinthians, that means we can not be together and doing activities with unbelievers. If you read Paul's epistles he clearly mentions that we should be different from the world. What happens to you is what's expected of every true christian. Just join a good church or visit other churches and make friends there, and hang out with true christian teens.

[BigNorsk]

You know what, many of those people are really looking for what you have. If you could look under those party party exteriors you would find a lot of very unhappy people. They are looking for love in all the wrong places. Sex, drugs, partying, they are all symptoms of how very lonely many of them really are.

You have God, you can never truly be alone, he is always with you. They are the ones who are alone, and they try to fill the void by "belonging" by being a party animal. Those throwin themselves at others for sex, to them that is as close as they get to feeling loved, and for most of them, they wouldn't recognize making love if it hit them with a baseball bat. Even their sex is basically selfish.

Many of them will continue their search for a long time. Some will die searching others will come to God. It can indeed be very lonely as a young Christian, often there are so few other believers in your age group, and especially when searching for that special someone, it can seem hopeless.

But do not be disheartened, you are soon coming to a time of change. I hope you will be able to attend college. It is a time when people aren't stuck into the image they grew up with. High schools tend to have everyone stuck into clicks that don't change much. There are probably people in your school that if you could get the chance to know them, you would get along great, but you don't get to meet each other (I don't mean just pass in the hallway) because either you or they are figuring the other is something they are not. And breaking through that is the fact that one thing that most high schoolers try very hard not to stand out. Even those who seem to want to stand out are almost always part of some group that wants to be different and within that group the conformity is very great.

So a little patience. Keep doing well in school and spending time with family and before you know it, you will meet people who think you have the greatest life, and they will be correct.

Marv

[ghs1994]

I do think it's important to have friends who aren't Christian too. That way you can associate with other people from other walks of life and get to know them and who knows maybe you (orginial poster) can be a personal testimony to people in your group who aren't Christians. When I was in high school I had a good mixture of Christian and non-Christian friends. My non-Christian friends helped me out a lot with life too with coming out of my shyness shell and everything. So sometimes you can learn from each other too. :)

Like I said previously, just be very discerning in who you call your friends. I can see aquaintances, but having friends who aren't helping you grow in Christ can be dangerous. It really depends on how strong you are and whether or not you are the influence or they influence you. I'd never ever tell anyone not to hang out with someone who's an unbeliever, but use good judgment to know when your relationship with Christ is suffering because of it and be willing to seperate from them because of it.

[Followers4christ]

Stay strong in your faith and pray for your friends.Try to talk with them about Christ, how He died for them and about Gods love for them.Also remember that God spoke about the end times as people not being lovers of the good but of the evil.God Bless :)

John 5:24"I tell you the truth ,whoever hears my word and believes Him who sent me has eternal life and will not be condemned he has crossed over from death to life."

2 Timothy 3:2-5 "People will be lovers of themselves,lovers of money,boastful,proud,abusive,disobedient to their parents,ungrateful,unholy,without love,unforgiving,slanderous,without self control,brutal,not lovers of the good,treacherous,rash,conceited,lovers of pleasure rather than lovers of god."

[fifi]

I would have to say be stong in your faith and dont let anyone keep you from serving God. we as christians the bible says that we will be outcats at times. and as for as friends go God will always give you friends that really are saved. and are after the same things yo are but in this world we will be by ourselfs sometime. but just put God first and everything will be ok.:)

[pastoroats]

Psalm 73:23-24
23 Yet I am always with you;
you hold me by my right hand.
24 You guide me with your counsel,
and afterward you will take me into glory.

Four promises from God in this passage:

1. He promises us His Presence (v. 23).

2. He promises His strength and comfort (23).

3. He promises His guidance (v. 24).

4. He promises His salvation (v. 24).

Hang and Hold on

[jingwei]

Maybe you should think about leaving NY after graduating if the problem's really bad. ( i always wanted to live with the amish or something)

[heatherq17]

Yea I know. Im 17 also! I dont even hang out with my friends hardley anymore simpley for that reason. you are doing the right thing though! Girls are like that at school here. I dont what the world is comming to anymore either *sighs*

[skiguy21]

This may seem hard but try setting a good example for all these kids..maybe showing them you are a christian by your words and your actions