Looking for a Vocational Direction! Care to share advice / experience?

[Flynmonkie]

:wave: I have a confession – I decided to post here because I have come to know most all of you and I respect your opinions. In addition, there might be someone else out there like me that can draw from any advice given.

I am trying to figure out what I want to be when I grow up. :sigh: My skill (or what I have fallen into and seem good at even though I don’t think so) has always been accounting (organization) and strong technology. But I HATE IT! For one I don’t feel like at the end of the day I have succeeded in doing anything beneficial to the world, or make a difference. On the other hand it totally drains me. It seems the positions I land are either too monotonous, too boring. If they are exciting with multitasking the employers usually expect long hours 90+ hours a week at my last employer. This conflicts with family life. My brain is so far extended something falls apart and it is usually home! I am considered a good, hard, honest, very organized, dependable, awesome with time management worker and always have raving reviews from my previous employers (except the ones that do not regard family time). I have been searching in this field for quite a while now and I have no responses. I believe the market is swamped and my only assets are experience and technical training. I am no doubt up against qualified educated individuals.

But I honestly don’t know what direction to go in. I love helping others however I am emotional in the social realm things affect me (spiritual gifts came back mercy as number one every time) Due to life circumstance, I have only a 8th or 9th grade education with GED. I did score top 1% of the nation and have been involved with an organization in my past that requires your IQ to be acceptable. So I had or have the capabilities to learn. Or should I say capacity. I am continually studying – I love theology (seeking truth of the Bible) But I am not sure where that could take me? I have been seriously thinking of Paralegal Avenue. But that feels so hopeless (mans law) I started pre-law classes (my childhood dream either that or teacher) but dropped to keep my husband at the time in and stay home with our children. (We both were pre law) In the meantime I started to develop a disgust for the politics involved it was very disheartening to me. And I am not sure I could deal with a bunch of kids in the capacity of teacher either.

On the other hand I have prayed daily that God give me some direction, and right now I really feel His answer is that I am home with my family. Based on the fact nothing is forthcoming at this time. This takes up quite a bit of my time. I run two small businesses out of my home. Neither are fulfilling but “pay the bills”. One is truly helping my husbands dream, and the other is just convenient. Between this and Home Management I am not even sure where I would find the time for a vocation. But something keeps tugging on me that I need to do SOMETHNG more secure and stable? For many reasons but truly I don’t know why??

I have always been the type that I do not believe in dropping my children off at childcare for them to teach them their morals and ideas to have material things. Especially at a formulative age. (Unless you have to! Please do not take that the wrong way - consider it just my goal in life). My youngest two never attended anything but preschool a couple days a week at the church before kindergarten. Family has always been my priority over everything else. So I am apprehensive about sending my youngest (2 yrs) off to childcare. But I do believe he needs the interaction. The other two had each other - they were 16 months apart. But to do this I would have to work outside of the home to manage the financial requirement for this. But this is not about material things (well a little bit it would help! But not really that much in comparison)

So enough about that. I think a lot about school. I love education. But I am terrified of school. In my experience (my field) formal education has not been a real necessity. I see people with Masters degrees working for 40k a year! EEK! My cousin is with the prosecuting attorney’s office and that is his salary after those very large notes he has out for Law school. I don’t use credit I pay in cash for everything I don’t believe in it unless it is necessary. But to attend school I would need to obtain loans. I have always been taught that. We should not owe anyone unless we have to. The technical school I attended really socked it to me with the hidden fees on that note and I learned quite a lesson. (What I have been taught came true) To be honest school always intimidated me extremely. I have no idea why. Who knows it might be some deep-seated issue I have or just an area where I have never been allowed to grow in or excel. Sometimes it seems selfish to me to take time away from my family for this. But I realize that it would help with many things too. So is there somewhere where you can assess what you might be good at and enjoy out there? I have taken a few “vocational” tests but they always come back Nurse or Pilot lawyer is right up there with those. (How they relate I haven’t a clue other than service and travel and you seriously do not want to see me around needles or sick people eek!)

Any thoughts or ideas on what I should do? It is just one of those situations where I am not sure where my will and Gods will meet and shake hands. I feel if He really wanted me out there working He would stick that in my path in more of a clearer way where I can see it as He has done with so many other things? But this feeling keeps getting stronger and stronger. I almost feel like I am not doing something I am supposed to be doing? I hate it when I cannot discern what to do next. Is it my age where I feel I need to be making some sort of mark on the world? I have probably answered my own question but I would like to hear others thoughts and or experiences on the matter. :) Has anyone ever felt like this?

[Crazy Liz]

Of all the fields you named, nursing is the one that will get you a professional job with a decent salary in the shortest period of time. It is also the field with the biggest shortage of qualified people, at least here in California, where new state laws have required higher staffing levels in hospitals in the last few years.

Check out the nursing programs in all your local colleges that offer it. In our area, there is one college that offers a program where the students earn their LVN license on their way to the education required for an RN. Be sure when checking out programs to ask about job placement. A women's re-entry counselor at your local community college or state university should have plenty of statistics for you about which professions are needed, starting and average pay, opportunities for part-time work, etc., as well as the course of study required to get there.

I am aware that there is very little demand for airline pilots, and major airlines are cutting pilot salaries by 30-50% right now. And since you have a family, that probably wouldn't be a great prospect for you unless you know someone in the air freight industry who could help you out. As far as law, I would not encourage that for someone who is not a young, driven undergrad with good connections. The average lawyer - especially one who works in a small town - is going to spend twice as much time studying and maybe 5-10 times the money on education, and is not likely to earn significantly more than a nurse, on average, without working those 80 hour weeks and being a good rainmaker. How much you earn in law depends more on your ability to land rich clients (or plaintiffs with big cases) than on your skill and talent.

So of pilot, nursing or law, I think nursing would by far be the best prospect, job-wise, but a re-entry counselor would be able to give you more specifics.

[mesue]

I was a willful, rebellious, stoned and drunken child. I was kicked out of high school when I was 16. Having that "Oh Yeah?!? I'll show you!!" attitude, I received my GED in February before my class graduated in June. I was 17 years old. I was going to go to college that September. That June, I became pregnant. I married the abusive idiot. He was in the middle of a lawsuit, and being 17, I was just plain foolish. Anyway, I left him when my son was 9 months old. I was on public assistance for a couple of years. This was back when that perfume commercial was on. "I can bring home the bacon and fry it up in a pan" (Yes, I'm dating myself) I so wanted to be her.
I remember my parents taking my son and I to dinner when I told them I want to go to college but didn't know what to take. Should I take accounting and have 3 martini lunches? Or go into nursing, like my girlfriend's mom told me to do.
Dad said "Take accounting." Mom said "Take nursing." Having never really gotten along with my mom, I went into business. I was really good in economics and really stunk at math. Accounting was easy enough for me, but to amortize a loan just didn't come easily for me. Then, I found out how very little I would make once I graduated. I had a son to support, I didn't want to have to be in school for 8 years to make decent enough money to support my son and myself. I was very disappointed. Then I found out how much a nurse makes. My brain was saying "Cha-Ching!!!" I switched majors.
Every one wants to hear that one becomes a nurse because they genuinely care for people. I did it for the money. I care about people, I love my job, but I can care for people any where on this planet, in any capacity. I needed to support my son.
There are so many different avenues to nursing. Being a nurse is so much more that taking care of sick people. You can take care of well people too. You can go into the mental health aspect of nursing. You can get dual degreed and be a para-legal and not touch or see anybody.
There aren't too many jobs that start you off at $40,000 right out of college for a 2 year degree, and that's the lower end of the pay scale.
:pray: I'll keep you in my prayers for guidence and wisdom :hug:

[JPPT1974]

It isn't about getting a degree.
It maybe good for your education to be a nurse.
But you have to have a kind heart.
Be patient, be cool, calm, and collected.
Also you must have to work with difficult patients and perhaps difficult management.
But trust in the Lord is all I can tell you.

[Flynmonkie]

First of all thank you both for taking your time to let me bounce this off you.

Liz yeah I think the pilot thing is out. My cousin owns a little Cessna – I think that is as close as I will get to that profession! ;) So truly it is a toss up between law and nursing. I have checked into the programs here and there but it seems confusing. The local hospitals have incentive programs too, but there are so many it gets confusing. If I go this direction I can do this, if I go that direction I can do that….. They have C.N.A incentives to get started. I really enjoyed working with the elderly and it seems most nursing or assisted living places offer work/education or used to at least. I have heard some hospitals will take you in certain positions such as phlebotomy with your C.N.A and then assist with educational needs. Just so many out there it confused me even more so I shelved the idea. But I think I will attempt investigating this a bit more aggressively

Thanks Mesue, this is really such a struggle for me. I really appreciate you sharing this about yourself :) The home situation was very bad when I was a child; I ended up with no place to live at 14 –15 years old. So I have fended for myself for many years. I know that feeling. I wasn’t a rebellious child or at least that was not the reason for my lack of education. I literally was placed on the street. I think that is what intimidates me a bit that my life is so different than others in this regard. How do you explain that? I actually made $45 K + with my last Financial Analyst position. What is funny is like you my math skills are awful too! I always thought it strange! I remember in one of my classes the teacher said “A Negative and a Negative equal a positive” to which I wholeheartedly responded in front of the class “not in my bank account it doesn’t” felt like an idiot. You’ll catch those airhead moments with me around here too.

You are right. I thought about counseling or something along those lines - but who am I to council? Like what do I know! If there is anything I have learned in life - you can never really know people. Just when you think you have things all buttoned down -pouf you get surprised! Sometimes people even irritate me – you know those with self-created problems? I could never afford to instigate drama in my life so I have little patience with those that do. Also there was a time I volunteered at the woman’s shelter teaching life technical office skill and that is where I learned that I am not really good at working in that capacity. It was the worst feeling having a gal that was very bright, who “got it” instinctively yet underestimated herself and returned to her abuser. I knew why, but that did not make it any less worrisome just extremely frustrating. Not that I wouldn’t be patient and stick by them – but it hurts to watch this. I became scared for them. I am sure you are well aware of how hard that can be for some women that are in abusive situations.

It is funny; my very best girlfriend is a Mortician. You would never ever put her in that field to look at her. She did this for the county for a while I used to help her during her internship at times for pick up. Now she owns a related business. In which she has asked if they decide to expand my direction that I run it here. This is on the table. But again - it is not something I feel I am doing a service to the world. She and I are so different in this regard. She thinks I would be good at it and has sort of been pestering me. She says after being a nurse for years it sort of numbs you – it does not affect you as bad once you have been exposed for a long time.

To tell the truth nursing sounds awesome, but the whole cleaning up vomit, wiping rear ends, enema and needles thing just really sends me. :sick: So where does that leave me? It is a tough program to get into – I believe you have to test in don’t you? If I remember correctly it was 4-6 years and of course continuing education (I think any field you should do this to keep abreast of what is new) Actually not for profit sounds perfect for me. Organizing events working with the needy (I have been there). What aspect of nursing are you in may I ask?

[newbeliever02072005]

Hi Flymonkie,

Sounds like you are at a crossroads in your life....."which way do I go?" I don't envy your position.

Have you thought about not necessarily working in the medical field but something a bit different like the dental industry? You can go to school to be an assistant or hygeinst and make a decent salary. What's nice about a dental office you don't have to contend with long hours, emergencies or the "messy parts" of "nursing".

I worked in the dental field for 8 years in a small country office. When I was hired it was with NO experience and NO training. So, if you are not sure if this is something you'd like, maybe you could find an office that could give hands-on-training before you persue the educational part of it. That way you only invest your time rather time & money. (Oh, and I did end up doing a correspondence course for dental assisting about 2 years into my job, that was really helpful. That only cost around 500 dollars.)

I hope you find some answers and peace about what direction you need to go with your job situation. I know it can be worrysome to figure it out.....but I know that once the right thing "plops" into your lap you will know its the right one. Sending up a prayer for you to see what God's will is for your life.

God Bless
newbeliever :wave:

[mesue]

...What aspect of nursing are you in may I ask?
I'm actually in between jobs. I was just offered a position as a telephone triage nurse at a neurological clinic. I was previously at a federal program that trains young adults for jobs. Previous to that I spent 10 years in jail :P. My mother5 always said I'd end up in jail, and I did :D I worked as an RN in the NY State Dept of Corrections. Now that was an interesting job! I have worked a bunch of other places too. Nursing isn't all needles and butts. A good nurse will help wipe butts, but that job is mainly for the CNA. I was one of those too before I got my license, this was way before NA's became CNA's. That's why I helped my CNA's when they had to do it. Needles aren't used as often as people think. They hurt too much.
Flyn, you continue to seek God about this. I love being a nurse, but it's not for everybody. But, consider that mercy and compassion go hand in hand.
... It is funny; my very best girlfriend is a Mortician. You would never ever put her in that field to look at her. She did this for the county for a while I used to help her during her internship at times for pick up. Now she owns a related business. In which she has asked if they decide to expand my direction that I run it here. This is on the table. But again - it is not something I feel I am doing a service to the world.
I don't know what the related business is. I can only imagine that it is a funeral home. If this is the case, maybe this is a perspective thing. A job well done shines through, even if it's only shining to God, it shows. I appreciate a well run wake/funeral. That I don't have to look after the details is a comfort to me. In all things, do to God's glory :)
While I'm on the subject of a job well done, and no one looking but God. I really appreciate the cleaning crew at church. That just popped in my head. They get no reccognition yet, that bathroom is always clean. I can't imagine using the ladies' room if they weren't there. If I'm happy to have them, I'm sure God is happier.
1 Peter 4:11 If any man speak, let him speak as the oracles of God; if any man minister, let him do it as of the ability which God giveth: that God in all things may be glorified through Jesus Christ, to whom be praise and dominion for ever and ever. Amen.

[Flynmonkie]

Wow! That sounds so interesting! I bet you have some stories! I think I remember you mentioned working for the State before --now that I think about it. Yes, I too believe no matter what I do, that any work should be done to glorify God. I ran a cleaning business when my oldest two were younger. I am not above anything to provide for my family. It is funny when I am doing a chore I really hate - I always talk to God through the whole thing! Pretty anal about it I guess. The boys went with me to work back then. But I REALLY burned out on that one. But I am sort of at the stage that I feel the urge to do something I truly enjoy and start setting myself up for a future.. when my youngest leaves.. I want something "of my own" rather tie all my identity into being mommy and wife. It is a security thing. When I am older I need to have something that I can do that will provide. But don't get me wrong I just love being a SAM. Another thing I really want to go to school to learn something new, and challenging. The practical thing would be to go for accounting and business. That combined with 17 years experience might be a good thing. But it sounds terribly boring to me.

You know another thing my best friend mentioned. She loved being a nurse, but she said it got to the point that she just felt like a paper pusher rather than the hands on she enjoyed. But the business they have is a funeral escort business. The Police Departments (cities) no longer want the liabilities that come with it, and they are the number one secondary employment for police officers in their city. In fact, they just helped in passing a law to make it mandatory for escorts with over 25(?) vehicles in a procession. The want to expand but we are thinking it will not be until early next year. Actually, it was my idea that got them started and they have been trying to find a way to get me more involved. Just not sure that is what I want to do - still thinking it over.

[Andyman_1970]

Hey Flynmonkie, I thought I’d comment on the whole pilot route.

I work in the aircraft industry and while I was in college (I went to CMSU because of their aviation program) my original intent was to become an airline pilot. One thing to keep in mind is there is a large initial cost on your part to becoming an airline pilot – a conservative estimate of flight training costs before one gets a job with a major airline as a second officer would be in the neighborhood of $15k. You have to have at least 500 flight hours before you can be hired to fly anything, even in a small airplane like flying skydivers around – which is what a lot of my classmates did there near Lexington. Also, most airlines require you to pay for your initial “check ride” in their simulator as part of the interview process. I took a class to be a flight engineer on a 727, TWA was going to charge me $3500 for the check ride in their simulator before they would consider me, that doesn’t even guarantee a job. So training costs are something to keep in mind.

Work schedule is another – even working for say Southwest as a pilot, until you are promoted to the “right seat” (captain) you pretty much have to take the schedule they give you, which could mean you would be gone from home 48-72 hours at a time. Getting promoted to the right seat can take years. Also, the smaller regional airlines where pilots start out only pay on the order of $12-15 an hour, in addition to a schedule that keeps you away from home several days.

Anyway, I hope that is helpful, feel free to holler at me if you have any other questions about that.

[Flynmonkie]

Andyman1970, Yes, I raised my children via TWA. That is where we worked when the boys were young. My ex started in facilities maintenance (janitor) when he was 18 then eventually moved into paint, I was in auto admin, or accounting. We owe that company a lot – the last of the Mohicans. We were able to get him through school with that position. Man I miss it. (Hated the rumors all the time but never had a better place to work!) Several in our family are still at AA - as you know took over. It is one of the largest employers here in KC next to Sprint :sick: and Ford. My little cousin has a plane and has offered that I log my hours with him, costing only gas. But I have never pursued it. When do I have time!?!? It is fun but I just don’t take that seriously. I have a couple of friends that are commercial pilots and a few that are AF and Marine. My commercial friends have had it rough the last few years. One was with United and laid off for quite a while eventually finding work in the private sector. The other also laid off and is with AA now. They told me the same thing that somewhere in the early 90s the airlines started requiring they fund the training. So I know it has changed quite a bit. When they would run about with my cousin or each other I was the only one in the group that did not fly….Hence my name..flynsquirrel! Or turned Flynmonkie. Monkie has been my nickname since childhood. They said I could follow them around from tree to tree… I always cracked up when people would ask my friend what does he do for a living he would say (depending if he wanted to meet the gal or not) "I am in public transportation" they would always assume he was a bus driver! ^_^ It was amazing how quickly some of those girls disappeared! Used to crack us up! But actually on the "vocational" test I had taken. Lawyer, Teacher, Nurse, and Pilot were the top few matches. I think it is because I really enjoy travel and other cultures? Who knows! But I really never seriously consider it - travel is nice but not with a young family you know? I thought it a funny thing for this test to throw in mixed with the others?

[Andyman_1970]

BTW the overhaul hangar at KCI with the "funky" roof - my dad helped design that - I thought as a former TWA employee you might appreicate that.

My grandfather was also an engineer at TWA. I never really knew what he did until I found one of his old engineering reports about a year ago and read it, come to find out I do almost the exact samething he did 50 years ago.........that whole circle of life thing is weird.

Anyway, I wish you well sister in your quest...............shalom................

[Flynmonkie]

My grandfather was also an engineer at TWA. I never really knew what he did until I found one of his old engineering reports about a year ago and read it, come to find out I do almost the exact samething he did 50 years ago.........that whole circle of life thing is weird.....

That is really cool to know! :cool:

But I think it is the coolest that you are in the same vocation.. that must be a great feeling. Truly! :thumbsup: Big Daddy owned the Saw Mill and Grandaddy owned the General Store. I must be headed for entrepreneur-ship! :scratch:

I have decided God must be telling me to “wait” because I am still really unsettled about it. And the answers are just not clear. This is how I usually gage things and it seems to work in my life. I am going to continue to pray. Keep faith. And be happy where I am as usual.

[Flynmonkie]

Mesue, It seems that I keep running into nurses. Maybe God is beating me in the head and I just keep discounting it. Nurses are Noble! I don’t think I would be a good nurse! Yesterday, I met a new gal that does some volunteer work for a local charity I visited. She has been a nurse for 47 years and all three of her kids are doctors! She started in the Navy. Those stories are just so cool. She talked with me about it quite a bit too. I said, I catch all the flus that come by what about being around sick people? She said a lot of us did! (I never knew that I always had this pre-conceived idea that all nurses were immune to everything? Silly.) I am worried about too many phlebotomy classes, or IV training eek.. but I really think I can handle it. She said because I am so worried about hurting people in this sense, it might be that I would be really good at it. The driving force to be good.

Well I checked into this. I am going to schedule a visit to the local community college within the month. I can obtain my LPN in 12 months of full time day classes, or 17 months evening and weekends. I assume the evening and weekends are going to be my best bet. But can you believe they actually have a 24-month RN program? They say that it will only take a year and a half after the LPN to move on to the RN stage?!? I always thought it took 4 solid years. I am not sure yet what I want to do but I thought I would start. Give it a try and as I grow in it - learn what direction I want to use the education or further my education. I am thinking Pediatrics.. But not sure yet of course. Hopefully, I can meet with them sometime this month, enrollment should be coming up rather quickly so I will need to get moving. I am really excited about this. And very nervous scared because I know nothing about it! And I am worried about taking the time away from my family.I might hate it but for some reason I don’t think so! Because when I entered technology certifications, and working in the accounting field. I just never felt a satisfaction. I was excited that I did it, but this is different. It feels like a direction with many possibilities. Like the world just opened up for me? Just thought I would share!

[mesue]

Aww, Flynn, good for you!! :hug:

I have a 2 year degree. I have another 2 year degree in Liberal Arts(from all the business classes I took) The phlebotomy part was the hardest for me too, and giving IM's (shots). But 9 times out of 10 I'll have patients tell me to "Give me the shot already" when I've already done it. It's all in the technique. God has blessed me that way. But my very first shot, I was sooo scared. I didn't want to hurt anybody either. But I determined that once I started, I would do it as quickly and flawlessly as possible and that no matter what, my patient wouldn't know it was my first shot, untill afterwards. God was good and gracious enough to make it all okay.
I love being a nurse, it's a part of me like being a Christian, wife or mother. It's just who I am. It's not just a job because it's something I do even when I'm not being paid.

[ZiSunka]

There are some really, really good tests you can take to help you understand your calling. Plus, really listen to your heart. God calls His people into professions that do good for the world even if they are boring of don't pay well, but what He calls you to, you feel passionate about. God's will isn't for you to be bored, stressed out or unhappy.

[JPPT1974]

Ask you college advisor or professor.
Most of all, pray to the Lord.
Ask for His advice and wisdom.
Into doing what is right and best for you.
:groupray: :amen: