Sexual Abuse in the Church

[FaithAlone]

OK, I tried to post this before but couldn't figure out out to word it and accidentally posted it 4 times : ) This is an anonymous poll about how often children are sexually abused in homes that profess to be Christian. I would like to poll all Christians but since I consider myself a non-denominationalist then I'll ask here and see if the results line up with other studies that I've seen.

[Spawn]

I was sexually abused, but not my my own family - by anothers. While he did profess to be christian, I would only call him a nominal Christian. The abuse occured in the cotext of Boy Scouts.

[FaithAlone]

Thanks for being brave enough to talk about it. I wanted to make this anonymous in case there are people here that don't want for others to know. I really hope that the numbers aren't high, but it's good for people to be aware that this goes on everywhere even in good Christian homes.

[Spawn]

Sno problem :) It's not like anyone here knows me from adam and I frankly intend to keep it that way :D

[FaithAlone]

I wonder why people are not voting. This post has had a lot of views but only 2 votes. You can vote either way and no one will know. Is there a specific reason why you would come here and not vote? The poll has an option for everyone.

[Spawn]

fear - often to admit to themselves what happened.

[FaithAlone]

Yeah, but no one will know since it's anonymous. A few more people have voted so I guess it just took a few to get it going. People can vote no also if they have not been abused so there should be no fear. Thanks to everyone who's voted so far. So what can be done to prevent abuse? I know my parents were extremely naive and secretive about everything. They don't like to face problems and think they just go away if they ignore them. I think that's probably the worst thing that can be done.

[Spawn]

I'll wager that mostly people are afraid of what others might think. Forbid that we should admit that we are not perfect . . . . I am who I am because of what I have been through - by the grace and love of God.

[New_Wineskin]

OK, I tried to post this before but couldn't figure out out to word it and accidentally posted it 4 times : ) This is an anonymous poll about how often children are sexually abused in homes that profess to be Christian. I would like to poll all Christians but since I consider myself a non-denominationalist then I'll ask here and see if the results line up with other studies that I've seen.

Ok . I wasn't *sexually* abused . Phyisically abused ? Definitely . Verbally and emotionally abused ? Absolutely . Manipulated through fear and guilt trips ? Oh , yeah .

[Velcro]

Yes, I hesitated to post. First, because I was not sexually abused in my home, so the poll does not apply. However, I was touched inappropriately by two different pastors and asked an inappropriate sexual question by another.

[Brother_Justin]

I was lucky to be raised in a loving home. Also I was the kind of youth who if touched in the wrong spots by a pastor I would have spit on them and walked out. I was a bad kid but I turned out ok :thumbsup: . It really is to bad how much of this stuff does happen in peoples homes and churches though and Im praying that these numbers arent hi! God bless you all!




Love brother ~Justin~ :crossrc:

[Velcro]

They are high, because the people feel powerless to tell, so they don't. What can a peon in the church say to convince people that a trusted leader, in a trusted position, who is their spiritual leader, is far from trustworthy? For them to admit this means that they, too, have been fooled and have made bad choices.

[New_Wineskin]

Good point , Velcro .

[FaithAlone]

I was not sexually abused in my home, so the poll does not apply. However, I was touched inappropriately by two different pastors and asked an inappropriate sexual question by another.

I guess I should have been more specific. If you were raised in a home that professes to be Christian and sexual abuse happened to you wherever, then the answer would be yes. I guess I just want to make people more aware that just because you raise your kids in a good home, that doesn't mean that you don't have to be careful about stuff like this.

[Telrunya]

Well the home I grew up in "professed" to be christian but that didn't stop things from happening.

[Velcro]

I guess I should have been more specific. If you were raised in a home that professes to be Christian and sexual abuse happened to you wherever, then the answer would be yes. I guess I just want to make people more aware that just because you raise your kids in a good home, that doesn't mean that you don't have to be careful about stuff like this.

I am sorry I misunderstood! I chose "yes."

However, I was one who was not reared in a good home. My rearing made me very vulnerable to abuse outside the home as well as in it.

Further, my parents were all-powerful and I was completely powerless, forced to have no opinions (spoken or unspoken), no control (even over my own body), no feelings (other than those commanded by Mother), and no belongings (everything I had belonged to Mother, and she made sure I knew that by occasionally burning/selling/taking my things). As a result, their church they had chosen for me was, in the very same manner, all-powerful and its leaders were gods. This made me all the more vulnerable to the abuse.

In fact, regarding the two pastors who touched me, I initially told only my husband and later my children, in order to protect them and let them know that I knew it could happen, in case it did to them. While I confronted one of the pastors who did it years after the incident (he denied that he had done it), I did not name names to anyone outside the family until after they died.

Here's what happens when one does this: The immediate response is, "So why are you saying this now, when they cannot defend themselves?" "If this were true, you would have told this when it happened." "I don't believe you, because their preaching was powerful and productive." Then there is complete, persistent silence.

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Telrunya:

Amein!!

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Justin wrote:I was lucky to be raised in a loving home. Also I was the kind of youth who if touched in the wrong spots by a pastor I would have spit on them and walked out. I was a bad kid but I turned out ok :thumbsup: .

You were not a bad kid; you were an empowered kid. BLESS YOU!