Do you ever find...

[SirTimothy]

As an Anglican, that you're desperately lonely? The people in your church all seem to be much older than you, and your friends/family don't really understand your innate love of liturgy, choral music, etc? I don't know why, just today I was feeling really lonely--I'm very very busy within activities in two different churches, but most people seem to be much older, or so radically different from me, that it's hard for me to understand just where they're coming from...

Timothy

[Father Rick]

Timothy...

By any chance have you considered pursuing orders?


I'm not trying to make a suggestion, just wondering about something before I answer this more thoroughly.

[SirTimothy]

By any chance have you considered pursuing orders?

Yes, I have. Still praying about it though.

Timothy

[Father Rick]

I figured you had....

I'll talk to you in pm...

[benedictine]

Fr. Rick, I'm sending you a pm as well.

[benedictine]

Timothy, I get that feeling all the time. I ususally have to go Catholic becouse I can't find anyone who'se not Lutheran or Anglican. I don't know any Orhodox. I do not want to become like many of my friends who are extreme protestant.

[AveMaria]

I've gone through periods where I've felt the same. I'm extremely blessed that my current parish has an active and healthy group of 20 and 30 somethings, which helps, but I find myself sometimes feeling lonely even in the crowd.

Keep praying, and I'll pray for you.

:crossrc:

[romaneagle13]

I know that feeling too, even at my advanced age. Most of the people who attend Mass with me are in their 50's and 60's (old enough to be my parents). But I do my best to fit in. There are more people my age who go to the earlier "family" Mass, but they all have kids and I don't quite fit in with them, plus I don't really care for the "kiddie scene", I like the solemn high Mass that I go to (plus that's the only service with choir, and I'm in the choir). My family don't really understand, they're Roman Catholic and my husband and his family are good people but not religious.

[Stormi]

I appreciate the older folks the best. They treat me like their granddaughter... ;) Very loving folk!

[gitlance]

I feel that way almost every single day. Father Rick would definately understand, I'm sure, as we have talked about things pertaining to that before.

But don't worry! God has a pull on each of our hearts, and that loneliness you are feeling may very well end up being His pull towards something great for you!

Feel free to PM me if you wish.

Christ's peace! :crossrc:

[Cjwinnit]

Inspired by this thread, I did a head-count at church today. 112 total, 44 male, 68 female. About 20 kids ( 0 - 17 ) and about 5 people between 18 to 30.

[TomUK]

About 80 went to church this morning- those aged 0-25, 1 (me!) 25-35, 10ish and the other 69 were older than 35 (that's old in my view :P )

[SirTimothy]

Well with diocesan Synod on at the moment, in this city, our church was packed this morning. Must've been about 12 vicars there... :) I was one of 2 0-25 year olds there (The second speaks very little english).

Timothy

[cenimo]

Gee, you folks come from larger churches....

We had 15 this morning (10 frmale, 5 male) for Rite 1....
(Rite 2 does a little better)
Except for the priest's wife, we proved the stat about the average being a 58 year old white female!

[Father Rick]

About 80 went to church this morning- those aged 0-25, 1 (me!) 25-35, 10ish and the other 69 were older than 35 (that's old in my view :P )You better watch it or you won't get to live to be 35!!!:D

[PaladinValer]

My home parish has about 20 youngins' (under 13), 20 teeners (13-21), 10 or so young adults (myself included - 20-35), 20 or so still-yong adults (36-45), 30 or so middle-aged adults (46-55), and 40 or so older/elderly folk (56+). So about 140 or so for Rite II

I don't go to Rite I, but I believe it is the more older crowd, and numbers I think just under 70 or so. So we have about 210 regular parish goers, with many more I'm sure that are high holy day-only goers too.

Happily though, it is a growing parish; we increase our paritioner rate about 10-20 or so members a year, which is pretty good. My priests are eventually going to start Saturday masses soon because of our growth, which hasn't shown any signs of ebbing at all.

[julian the apostate]

oh my
i am used to roman catholic churches numbers for which are astonishingly higher

ecusa church i attend for rite 1 generally older maybe ave age 65? maybe 50 people

rite 2 which i usually go to is maybe 300-400 the vast majority of which are under 40
lots of kids,, mini homily and liturgy for kids at beginning of service (under 10 yrs of age) then they are off to sunday school and back in time for communion
they have teen groups and so on as well

[SirTimothy]

rite 2 which i usually go to is maybe 300-400 the vast majority of which are under 40
lots of kids,, mini homily and liturgy for kids at beginning of service (under 10 yrs of age) then they are off to sunday school and back in time for communion

That's more what I'm used to, except in the 180-230 range of people back in the UK.

Timothy

[benedictine]

we had 45 people at church this morning, usually around 75, but we had an ice storm yesterday. I served as the only acolyte. I wasn't even scheduled. two out of town, one broke his arm, one never got the schedule.

[Cjwinnit]

That's more what I'm used to, except in the 180-230 range of people back in the UK.

Timothy

Dude, you should so see HTB..

[AveMaria]

No way I could count how many where there! But we do have a fairly healthy bell curve of human diversity.

[Iron Sun 254]

My problem now is that most people my age have children and so I feel like I have little in common with them. Also, we're still new to our new parish so we don't know many people yet.

[benedictine]

I had the priests two daughters, me , and two guys in Church school. Not the usual amount. Again, ice. One of the teachers was trapped at home.

[PaladinValer]

At my college parish, a few fellow college or grad students go to the regular morning Sunday Masses. However, the priest has a college ministry going called Canterbury, which is a special 5pm "Half Mass" service (basically, a Rite I service [no music, etc] yet using Rite II wording yet minus the Psalm and one Reading [we do either the Old Testament or New Testament Lesson plus the Gospel]) then we head over to the Rectory to have dinner with the priest and his family (wife and three adorable children). A large number of us go; used to be 6-8 including myself although it is going to be more like 8-11 now :)

[GaelSong]

My church has about 30 members and most of them are old. There are only about 3 families with young children. I too feel out of place sometimes. I love choral music and old hymns.

[SirTimothy]

Dude, you should so see HTB..

It's huge, I'm told--we had one of the assistant vicars come speak over here. Only problem is, are they still involved in the Toronto Blessing stuff? I'm a little bit wary of going to a church that does that sort of thing...

Timothy

[julian the apostate]

What is HTB

i must know

[SirTimothy]

HTB is Holy Trinity Brompton. The people who started the Alpha Course.

Timothy

[Songspinner]

I know exactly how you feel ...we've got about 3 of us under thirty....unfourtunatly on is also an ex boyfriend so I really have no want to bond with him...

But really ...that's why we're on the forum isn't it...so we could find people like us to chat to

[Bonifatius]

Well, my church is much different. As we are a nice bunch of people from all sorts of origins (US, Canada, GB, Asia, Germany) our average age group is much much younger than that of any other church. It mainly has to do with the fact that people who move to other countries tend to be younger. We only have one really elderly gentlemen. All the others move back to their home countries before they get old or die. It is also a wonderful church because it lacks all sorts of conflict that you have to deal with in a *normal* church. We do not quarrel about theological views, we embrace diversity. We do not have these music or liturgy discussions. And we do not have to look after a building (as we use the local Old Catholic Church). We are a group of Anglicans who come together because we all want to celebrate this kind of liturgy and that's exactly what we want.

On first sight this looks really nice - but on the other hand we have to face other kinds of problems. For me it is relatively easy as I am German - when I go home from church on Sunday I am still in "my" country - I just switch languages. For other members of my church this is much more difficult. Even if they have lived here for years, they still have the feeling that they remain foreigners. On the other hand they do feel as kind of strangers when they go back to their home countries for holiday. In some ways they are lost between cultures and that is not always easy. Although getting older, being ill or even dying are not so present in our midst, these subjects often come up, because friends or family members are ill or dying. And then it is very hard for our members not to be there, not to be able to help or support as other people can who live in the same country or in the same town.

So - if you lack one kind of problem, you can easily have other problems ... This is earth, not yet heaven ...

All the best,
Bonifatius

[Hujusmodi]

Boy, I know what it's like -- more so from being single than from being young (I ain't so young anymore!). My fiance will go with me eventually -- I haven't pressed the issue, but he is a believer. But at the moment, I don't go myself pending a move. Now, when we move to Central WV, I know that the EC I'll attend will be "old". The EC is, alas, dying there. And since my beloved is a truck driver, I'm sure I'll be the proverbial "little old middle-aged lady" driving to church on Sunday. But who knows? Maybe things can turn around ...

[UberLutheran]

Well, my church is much different. As we are a nice bunch of people from all sorts of origins (US, Canada, GB, Asia, Germany) our average age group is much much younger than that of any other church. It mainly has to do with the fact that people who move to other countries tend to be younger. We only have one really elderly gentlemen. All the others move back to their home countries before they get old or die. It is also a wonderful church because it lacks all sorts of conflict that you have to deal with in a *normal* church. We do not quarrel about theological views, we embrace diversity. We do not have these music or liturgy discussions. And we do not have to look after a building (as we use the local Old Catholic Church). We are a group of Anglicans who come together because we all want to celebrate this kind of liturgy and that's exactly what we want.

On first sight this looks really nice - but on the other hand we have to face other kinds of problems. For me it is relatively easy as I am German - when I go home from church on Sunday I am still in "my" country - I just switch languages. For other members of my church this is much more difficult. Even if they have lived here for years, they still have the feeling that they remain foreigners. On the other hand they do feel as kind of strangers when they go back to their home countries for holiday. In some ways they are lost between cultures and that is not always easy. Although getting older, being ill or even dying are not so present in our midst, these subjects often come up, because friends or family members are ill or dying. And then it is very hard for our members not to be there, not to be able to help or support as other people can who live in the same country or in the same town.

So - if you lack one kind of problem, you can easily have other problems ... This is earth, not yet heaven ...

All the best,
Bonifatius

Of course, I'm really fond of most all things German: after all, a country which gave us Luther, Eschenbach, Brecht, Kafka, Heine, E.T.A. Hoffman, Schiller, Goethe, Rilke, Mann, Kant, Scheidt, Telemann, Pachelbel, Buxtehude, Bach, Beethoven, Hummel, Weber, Mendelssohn, Schumann, Brahms, Reinecke, Reger, Hindemith and Elisabet Ney is quite obviously doing SOMETHING right!

I'd learn German in a New York minute if it meant I could live in Germany! (I've played several solo and chamber music recitals, including one of my own music -- and the Germans were just about the nicest (and musically knowledgeable) people I've ever met!)