Change Good or Bad?

[FaithWeaver]

I am having a very difficult time. You see, I have been going to the same church for 24 years (my entire life). I was a very active member; choir, Sunday school teacher, Youth leader, dance team member, Youth dance team coordinater.

Now God has told me that it is time to leave. I have to follow what God wants and not what I want to stay in his will. This is one of the hardest things that I have ever had to do. Has anyone else had to make a difficult decission to leave their home church as well?:sigh: :cry:

I really miss my church, but I know it's God's will. Any words of encouragement would be great. Thanks

[unimportantbuthisnameis]

Follow God, you'll be blessed for it.

[SumTinWong]

Facing the same choice here, which means when and if I move to another church I will no longer be a member here in the Baptist forum. That wil be pretty tough as well.

[ZiSunka]

What makes you think that God is telling you to leave the church you love?

[Vessel Of Mercy]

I would have to echo Lambslove's question. FaithWeaver, if you are submitting to the word of God (the Bible) in your decision to change churches, then press forward with all assurance and comfort, knowing that you are obeying the Lord's will. That's not to say it won't be hard, I can imagine how painful it must be to leave your family of believers there. Be diligent in coming to God and casting your anxieties on Him. Know the assurance, strength, and peace that was bought for you on the cross. Let all your trust be in Jesus and what He has done. Not one hair falls from your head without His direction. He works all things for the good of us who love Him, who He has called according to His purpose. I must make a note, however, that if you are not following what God's revelation to us (the Bible) clearly says, then you have no comfort at all except that He may grant you repentance and forgiveness. I doubt this is the case, but I thought I'd include a fair note for consideration anyway. :-)

Read Matthew 11:25-30 and 1 Peter 5:6-8

Grace and peace to you in the Lord Jesus Christ.

Ben

[FaithWeaver]

I know when God is speaking to me. I have the discernment
to know it is him. It is just a very difficult decision, but I am going to trust in Him. He has sent my husband and I to a new church. The people are great, and I know that we can really spiritually grow there. Just pray that I let go of the past and look to the future, to what God has in store for me and my family. Thank you for all of your help.:prayer:

[DiscipleOfIAm]

I would talk it over with my pastor as well. If he felt that God was truly leading you to another church, maybe he could give some insight as to why. Either way, two heads are better than one. It will also allow the pastor to know why you left if you decide to leave.

[Sword-In-Hand]

My wife and I were faced with a difficult decision to switch churches four years ago. We attended an Independent Baptist church, that at one time had been the cornerstone of our county. However, the older people of the church did not like the younger people "invading" their territory, so slowly we were not allowed to participate in any functions, it was considered a heresy to listen or play any music other than hymns, even though the pastor preached against such things. Pretty much things began to fall apart and the people would not allow God to use us. Sad indeed.

My wife started visiting another church, Southern Baptist, where our friend was now pastoring. She loved it, I visited it and loved it as well, but I was dead set in staying at my home church and trying to help it from dying. Well God spoke to me the next time I visited the SBC church. I made up my mind that I wasn't switching, but a hymn began to play, it was "Where He leads I will follow," and I just felt God grab me by the shirt and say, "Go!" So I did and because of the obedience, my wife and I are now leaders in the church, I'm the drama director, praise team member and leader of youth rally worship.

The point to my story is to be obedient. Don't listen to anyone else if you know God is speaking to you. If He is telling you to go, then go. Just remember that it will cost you more to be disobedient to the Lord than what you think you may be losing now by switching churches. God knows what He's doing, so my advice would be to go with Him. Don't dwell on the reasons, just listen and follow.

[Vessel Of Mercy]

Certainly God speaks through circumstances, but there is no reason to simply make decisions on a whim or "God's voice." Everything we do must be done in accordance with the Scriptures. Maybe there is good reason to move churches that is plain to see. Maybe God has convicted you of certain things and has done so using songs or people's words or even the Bible. But Satan is sure to twist even Scripture to suit his ends and what many may hear in a song, from other people, or in Scripture, may be used by our ignorant hearts in submission to our evil desires to do what ought not be done. I'm not accusing you of anything, FaithWeaver, since I don't know your circumstances, as it would be helpful to know why you are intent on changing churches. There has got to be a solid reason other than what you feel in your heart, because the heart is not to be trusted. The Word of God used by the Spirit is the only absolutely dependable voice of God on this earth.

[ZiSunka]

I know when God is speaking to me. I have the discernment
to know it is him. It is just a very difficult decision, but I am going to trust in Him. He has sent my husband and I to a new church. The people are great, and I know that we can really spiritually grow there. Just pray that I let go of the past and look to the future, to what God has in store for me and my family. Thank you for all of your help.:prayer:

Fairweather, discernment is not following a vague feeling that you think is from the Lord. Discernment is knowing when a thought or feeling is in line with the word of God. Just because you think you will grow more in the Lord at the new church is reason enough to move, you don't have to ascribe that desire to a direct command of God, or even that you can ascribe it to him. Just say, "My husband and I have found a new church where we think we will grow in knowledge and love for God, but it's hard for us to leave the church we have loved for so long."

[Vessel Of Mercy]

Good thoughts, lambslove. As long as Faithweaver and her husband are leaving the church for reasons that don't contradict the Word of God, then there isn't much to be concerned about. What we can't do as Christians is to ascribe all feeling we get, thoughts that pops in our head, or even voices we hear as all being what God is telling us. He speaks principally through his Word. He never contradicts himself, either, so if something that comes to our minds goes against the principles laid out in Scripture, it's wrong and from the devil or our own evil desires.

FaithWeaver, DiscipleOfIAm's advice is good, too. It would be beneficial to talk with your current pastor about the situation.

Whatever happens, seek the Lord's counsel in his Word and through prayer. Ask him for good circumstances. Find comfort in the change that, as I said before, "God works all things to the good of those who love him, who are called according to his purpose." Rest in the cross of Christ as your comfort.

Grace and peace from God through Jesus our Lord as you make this decision with your husband.

Ben

[Gold Dragon]

Facing the same choice here, which means when and if I move to another church I will no longer be a member here in the Baptist forum. That wil be pretty tough as well.

That would be a terrible loss for this forum but hopefully a wonderful gain for the kingdom as you grow in whatever spiritual journey God has in mind for you. God bless.

[SumTinWong]

That would be a terrible loss for this forum but hopefully a wonderful gain for the kingdom as you grow in whatever spiritual journey God has in mind for you. God bless.
I appreciate the sentiment, I really do but I really wish we did not have these little ghettos, as Liz calls them, seperating us all. There are some here in CF who thrive on being seperatists, and I am not one of those people.

Anyway...

If I do move, the places I have considered are all non-denominational except for two: St. Pauls Episcopal, and New Beginnings Free Methodist. I really cannot make the change until my terms are up on certain boards (2007) but I may go to other churches during the week as well as ours on Sunday.

[ZiSunka]

What church are you thinking of moving to Fairweather? I hope it's orthodox in its theology, but the way you are talking about leaving everyone you love forever, it sounds like it might be one of those "churches" that makes you break all contact with people who go to a different church. I'm getting worried.

[FaithWeaver]

What church are you thinking of moving to Fairweather? I hope it's orthodox in its theology, but the way you are talking about leaving everyone you love forever, it sounds like it might be one of those "churches" that makes you break all contact with people who go to a different church. I'm getting worried.


What makes you think that my new church would make me break all contact. I haven't said anything to make you think that. Don't worry. I am simply sad about moving churches, leaving my comfort zone. My decision to move is backed up by scripture. I have sought God through prayer, through his word, and through faith. It was a hard decision to make, but I made it so that I would do what God would have me do. We have now left our old church, and God has sent us to a new church where He is already revealing Himself to us. We love the people, and the Spirit is there. You walk through the doors, and you can feel God's presence. Thanks for all of the advice, but don't worry. God has me and my husband in his hands. Everything is falling in to place, and I am now at total peace with my decision. There is a reason for this change, and I know that God is in it.

[Sword-In-Hand]

What makes you think that my new church would make me break all contact. I haven't said anything to make you think that. Don't worry. I am simply sad about moving churches, leaving my comfort zone. My decision to move is backed up by scripture. I have sought God through prayer, through his word, and through faith. It was a hard decision to make, but I made it so that I would do what God would have me do. We have now left our old church, and God has sent us to a new church where He is already revealing Himself to us. We love the people, and the Spirit is there. You walk through the doors, and you can feel God's presence. Thanks for all of the advice, but don't worry. God has me and my husband in his hands. Everything is falling in to place, and I am now at total peace with my decision. There is a reason for this change, and I know that God is in it.

That's awesome to hear! Also good to hear that you followed the Lord no matter what was going to be the outcome.

[RED that's ME]

God does close doors sometimes for us to move on. You do need to talk with your pastor about it and leave with his blessing.:)

A person should always needs to make sure they are leaving for the right reasons and that it's God's will. You should always leave on good terms with the Pastor and members.
Not saying you are but too many leave churches cause something happened (not doctrine disagreements) they didn't like instead of Biblically dealing with it as Matthew 18:15-18. My city (don't know if it still is) use to be in the Book of Guinness World Record for having the most churches per capita which is really sad in a sense. Too many get mad leave a church and start another one without truly seeking God or getting God's permission/approval for their actions.

The church I'm in I would also hate to leave. It's all I have know most all my life and I have many close friends there. :angel:
http://www.choiceshirts.com/images/A1/05/A10593B-md.jpg

[ZiSunka]

Too many get mad leave a church and start another one without truly seeking God or getting God's permission/approval for their actions.




I'm guilty of that. One family at the church just really ticked me off, then started to gossip about it. Really, they ticked a lot of people off. The pastor was there when they did it and wouldn't deal with that family, just went along with them. I left because it was easier than trying to work things out with that family, and because I didn't want to make waves for everyone else.

It was wrong to do that, and I'm grossly sorry. I still don't want to deal with this family because I'm still mad about things that happened 6 months ago. :sigh:

[Sword-In-Hand]

I'm guilty of that. One family at the church just really ticked me off, then started to gossip about it. Really, they ticked a lot of people off. The pastor was there when they did it and wouldn't deal with that family, just went along with them. I left because it was easier than trying to work things out with that family, and because I didn't want to make waves for everyone else.

It was wrong to do that, and I'm grossly sorry. I still don't want to deal with this family because I'm still mad about things that happened 6 months ago. :sigh:

In situations where there are families who do not get along and gossip fluries more than fellowship that is when I usually ask God to remove stumbling blocks, even if its me. So far that prayer has worked out for our church. All the "old school" families who thought we should never change to the point of we shouldn't even hold Bible school because our church building was too new (seriously), God has removed from the body. Now I don't mean pray that every time someone makes us mad lol, but in the most extreme cases where people hinder growth and the Lord's work.

I know what your dealing with LL, been there a few times myself.

[ZiSunka]

Thanks for the encouragement SIH!

It's not the old-school families that are the problem, it's the interaction between the old-schoolers and this one bulldozer family that thinks they should be treated like royalty because of who they are. On our mission trip last year, it finally came home to me that we weren't there because of our love for the native people and for Christ, but for the benefit of this particular family, who's dead uncle's estate was paying for the whole thing. They even had numerous members of their family on the trip and they were the biggest pains in the neck imaginable. My newly saved brother-in-law was a better example of Christ than some of them were. They constantly focused on the money and made sure that everything else was less important. People in the camp ground complained about the noise our group made, and the mess that we made and the hours that we kept. We made ourselves very burdensome. People would camp next to us one night, then ask to be moved to the other side of the camp ground, and the leader of the team just poopooed it off, because she is the special princess of this dead uncle and doesn't have to be Christ like because...well, I'm not sure why she is exempt from being a good example, but when she started name-calling and chasing people around yelling at them, I wanted to die from embarassment.

Well, got that off my chest. Maybe I'll be able to get past it now!

Thanks for the therapy time! :)

[Sword-In-Hand]

Thanks for the encouragement SIH!

It's not the old-school families that are the problem, it's the interaction between the old-schoolers and this one bulldozer family that thinks they should be treated like royalty because of who they are.

LOL! Met a few of them also.

[SonOfThunder]

I am having a very difficult time. You see, I have been going to the same church for 24 years (my entire life). I was a very active member; choir, Sunday school teacher, Youth leader, dance team member, Youth dance team coordinater.

Now God has told me that it is time to leave. I have to follow what God wants and not what I want to stay in his will. This is one of the hardest things that I have ever had to do. Has anyone else had to make a difficult decission to leave their home church as well?:sigh: :cry:

I really miss my church, but I know it's God's will. Any words of encouragement would be great. Thanks

Hi there

I am 24 also and left home last year to follow after what God had spoken to me about so perhaps my story will encourage you.

My cousin died for want of blood after having a baby. She was my childhood friend and playmate as well as my cousin. She, like me grew up as one of Jehovah's Witnesses. This threw me a great deal and I realised I hadn't really studied into this 'belief' myself and wondered if she had.

I asked my dad (an elder within the congregation) to help me in this, but my manner and grief upset him and he asked me to stay quiet rather than upset the rest of the family while they also came to terms with the loss. The baby had lived, he had to be cared for and many adjustments had to be made as well as the funeral. Dad was busy and I started to study this out myself and realised the teaching was wrong. People need not die over what was one Scripture. My cousin died believing what she did was right and for Jehovah, her motive was pure.

This got me interested in what else was wrong, and many months of study followed. I came to this forum and had a mentor for some time who helped me a lot. Eventually I didn't attend the meetings but spent the time praying and felt God was saying to get out from among them.

For me it meant being disfellowshipped and I knew that my family would possibly disown me, hoping this will bring me back into the 'truth'.

At my fathers request I left home. I live alone now and send e-mails home each day but never a responce.

It is difficult to make the move, once you have decided whom you will follow it is easier.

I can't say I don't think of going home and pretending. I do. The Baptist church I go to now seems to be so different in their doctrine, so many things to study and understand. Prayer helps.


God Bless you

James

[FaithWeaver]

Hi there

I am 24 also and left home last year to follow after what God had spoken to me about so perhaps my story will encourage you.

My cousin died for want of blood after having a baby. She was my childhood friend and playmate as well as my cousin. She, like me grew up as one of Jehovah's Witnesses. This threw me a great deal and I realised I hadn't really studied into this 'belief' myself and wondered if she had.

I asked my dad (an elder within the congregation) to help me in this, but my manner and grief upset him and he asked me to stay quiet rather than upset the rest of the family while they also came to terms with the loss. The baby had lived, he had to be cared for and many adjustments had to be made as well as the funeral. Dad was busy and I started to study this out myself and realised the teaching was wrong. People need not die over what was one Scripture. My cousin died believing what she did was right and for Jehovah, her motive was pure.

This got me interested in what else was wrong, and many months of study followed. I came to this forum and had a mentor for some time who helped me a lot. Eventually I didn't attend the meetings but spent the time praying and felt God was saying to get out from among them.

For me it meant being disfellowshipped and I knew that my family would possibly disown me, hoping this will bring me back into the 'truth'.

At my fathers request I left home. I live alone now and send e-mails home each day but never a responce.

It is difficult to make the move, once you have decided whom you will follow it is easier.

I can't say I don't think of going home and pretending. I do. The Baptist church I go to now seems to be so different in their doctrine, so many things to study and understand. Prayer helps.


God Bless you

James

:prayer:
Thank you for sharing your story with me. I couldn't imagine how hard that must have been for you. Know this, God will bless you and keep you. Your obedience to him will pay off one day. Follow Him, not matter what the cost. Be relentless for Christ. I will be praying for you.:hug:

[mfarley]

My wife and I moved from the Bay Area about 6 months ago where both of us grew up. She had to leave the church she loved so much and the pastor she cared for. But sometimes we don't realize it's time to move on when it is, there seems to be comfort in our routine. But God always realizes the best for us, and if He is having you move then cling to Him.

A friend of mine and his family left everything, job, house, friends, because he was called to do so. He used probably the most fitting analogy: When you were young, you played hide and seek in the backyard. But soon, as you grew the yard's hiding places became scarce as others also knew them...so you moved to the front yard. But soon, as you grew those hiding places became known as well. So you expanded it to the block. You see, we get in a routine and sometimes become lackadaisical. You've talked with your neighbors, you know the churches, you know the people. Sometimes God calls us to move out of this into a brand new territory--and trust me it is very exciting. I don't know if this is the case for you, but trust in the Lord and cling to Him, He will not lead you astray.

God Bless you for having the courage to do this and admit you are scared...submit it to the lord and I believe He will comfort you.

Mike :wave:

[staceyvonne]

If God is speaking to you and telling you to go, go.

Bless those people that you love and have been with all these years and go. It may be hard, but if God is leading you He will help you with the hurt of leaving friends and family.

Something wonderful is waiting out there for you, no telling what our Father has in mind for you.

God Bless.

Stacey
:prayer:

[SonOfThunder]

Matthew 28:19Go ye therefore, and teach all nations, baptizing them in the name of the Father, and of the Son, and of the Holy Ghost




May I ask you to consider if you don't obey what God is telling you?
How many lives will you affect in obedience?
God won't give you more than you can bear
He will give you Joy and peace in you're obedience



James wonders if you have decided?

Have you?
Have you?

we sure would like to know ;)


James

[FaithWeaver]

:wave: I just want to thank everyone for your advise and your prayers. My husband and I have left our home church and we are now attending a church where we feel very welcomed. God is there. We both feel led to join, so we are planning on joining this Sunday. In fact, the pastor's wife, who I have known for years, asked me to help with the youth, and start a dance team since she knew that I felt led to do it. Everything is working out great! Praise God:clap:


"Lord your are good and your mercy endurth forever...":D

[DarkGalaxy]

I'm kind of at this same crossroads of changing churches too, and I'm not really sure where God wants me to be. I am continuing to pray about this.

[SumTinWong]

Just keep praying about it DarkGalaxy

[Hisgirl]

I've enjoyed reading this thread. Changing churches sometimes feels like we're turning our backs on friends and family. But it does help to remind us what the 'church' really is. It is the body of Christ and the Head of the Church is really Father/Son/Holy Ghost...not our pastor. So you will still be in your church...just a different location!

As for talking with pastors....that would be interesting indeed. I would hope pastors are always able to set aside the 'stolen sheep' feeling and encourage the family to be led by the Spirit....blessing them and reminding them that they are always welcome. Has anyone here had experience with this?

And what if the reason for leaving was indeed the pastor himself? That would be an uncomfortable discussion....

My husband and I have changed churches as our growth changed....we went to one church where we left with a 'milk moustache' every Sunday. Then we attended a SBC for several years. We are now at a Vineyard church ... it's all about equipping, equipping, equipping for the Harvest. Less focus on the inside of the church and more focus on the outside. The pastor said last week,"I don't want an audience...I want an army!"