How would you feel

[BjBarnett]

Hello everyone!

I have a question. this may seem like an odd question but never the less its one id like to have your opinions on :D

anyway how would you (as Baptist) feel about a Catholic (like me ^_^) marrying into a entirely Baptist family? If you were apart of this family (who is entirely Baptist) what would your feelings be about this? How would you feel about your child (or cousin or niece) marrying in a Catholic church by a Catholic priest? any input here would be greatly appreciated :) thanks in advanced.

[SumTinWong]

Gee I wish I could answer that BJ. I got Aunts and Uncles that I love dearly that are Catholics. I got an Aunt going to Rhema and is a full blown tongue wagging/speaking pentecostal. My mother in law used to a be a nun, and father in law used to be in seminary to become a priest. My Mother is Pentecostal, and my father is a non church going former evangelical, Christian. My sister attends a non-denominational church and myself I am just here in this Baptist church because this is where the Lord put me, otherwise I might be in the Episcopal or Presbyterian church.

Anyway, it aint none of my business what denomination someone marries into in my family. What church they go to factors in less with me than what kind of a person you are. If you are an idiot I am against it, even an idiot Baptist, and Lord yes there are many of them.

Why is Crystals family giving you all a hard time?

[jones_of_pbf]

I don't know anything about the Catholic faith, but I'm fine with it (marrying Catholic/Baptist).
My uncle and his immediate family were Catholic, and worshiped Jesus.

[BjBarnett]

Gee I wish I could answer that BJ. I got Aunts and Uncles that I love dearly that are Catholics. I got an Aunt going to Rhema and is a full blown tongue wagging/speaking pentecostal. My mother in law used to a be a nun, and father in law used to be in seminary to become a priest. My Mother is Pentecostal, and my father is a non church going former evangelical, Christian. My sister attends a non-denominational church and myself I am just here in this Baptist church because this is where the Lord put me, otherwise I might be in the Episcopal or Presbyterian church.

Anyway, it aint none of my business what denomination someone marries into in my family. What church they go to factors in less with me than what kind of a person you are. If you are an idiot I am against it, even an idiot Baptist, and Lord yes there are many of them.

Why is Crystals family giving you all a hard time?

hehe thanks for the response uncle bud.

Crystals family isnt giving us a hard time visibly yet but im afraid that maybe around the corner as they are very much against the idea of us getting married in a Catholic church by a Catholic priest. They have actually indicated that they may not attend the wedding if it was in a Catholic church by a Catholic priest. Needless to say they are very much against the idea of raising our pontential children as Catholics so im having reasonable fears that as we marriage becomes more and more likly that the opposition will increase.

so i figured id get the opinions of the Baptist here on Christian forums as away of getting an idea of what to expect and maybe get a better feeling of how to handle the situation.

[fluffy_rainbow]

We had a similar question earlier this week, but this one has a different spin on it.

If my daughter came to me and said, "I'm marrying a Catholic man and we are having a Mass wedding" I would be disappointed. Why? Because I would know that in order for a priest to marry her and her fiance, she would have to convert. As a mother (not yet though) I would feel sad because I feel families should try and worship together if possible. Converting to Catholicism would prohibit this. Plus, what faith would the child(ren) be raised in? I wouldn't try and talk my daughter out of it, if she felt this was the man God intended for her to be with, but I would urge her to be in serious prayer over it as there are many doctrinal and tradition differences between Baptists and Catholics. How would this effect the marriage?

[BjBarnett]

We had a similar question earlier this week, but this one has a different spin on it.

If my daughter came to me and said, "I'm marrying a Catholic man and we are having a Mass wedding" I would be disappointed. Why? Because I would know that in order for a priest to marry her and her fiance, she would have to convert. As a mother (not yet though) I would feel sad because I feel families should try and worship together if possible. Converting to Catholicism would prohibit this. Plus, what faith would the child(ren) be raised in? I wouldn't try and talk my daughter out of it, if she felt this was the man God intended for her to be with, but I would urge her to be in serious prayer over it as there are many doctrinal and tradition differences between Baptists and Catholics. How would this effect the marriage?

oh yeah no doubt raising the pontential children in the Catholic faith would definatly not be well received. I would think that no parent would be to keen on the idea of there grand child being raised in a different faith. How would you guys feel abut that? I mean that definatly has to be a big topic of interest because id say that one be one of the larger concerns of the Baptist family.

[SumTinWong]

hehe thanks for the response uncle bud.

Crystals family isnt giving us a hard time visibly yet but im afraid that maybe around the corner as they are very much against the idea of us getting married in a Catholic church by a Catholic priest. They have actually indicated that they may not attend the wedding if it was in a Catholic church by a Catholic priest. Needless to say they are very much against the idea of raising our pontential children as Catholics so im having reasonable fears that as we marriage becomes more and more likly that the opposition will increase.

so i figured id get the opinions of the Baptist here on Christian forums as away of getting an idea of what to expect and maybe get a better feeling of how to handle the situation.
The situation you are facing might be the same for some ethnic groups. I know that there are some white folk who would not be happy if a black man/woman were to be married into the family. There are people who are Greek who think that they should only be marrying Greeks (saw "my big fat greek wedding" recently) and so on. But those are racial and cultural differences.

There are big differences between these two churches, and perhaps you and/or Crystal will have to answer questions for her family to help them out. I would talk to them and try to find out exactly why they might object and if they have valid concerns (like maybe Crystal drools enough to fill a swimming pool and you are likely to drown in your sleep), then perhaps you can find an alternate idea. Most likely though one of you is going to be the black sheep in their respective families, and you both had better be prepared to say goodbye to friends and families that will object.

If you do not marry in the Catholic church, by a priest, your church and will not be happy for sure, but what about your family? If you marry in the Catholic church, her family will be hurt.

My advice get married by a justice of the peace and minimize the hurt feelings. Go to Vegas and get married int eh Big hunka wedding cake chapel or something ;)

[fluffy_rainbow]

Well, I may be wrong, but from what I understand a priest will not marry a couple unless both parties are Catholic and if they are not married in the Catholic faith, the marriage is not recognized by the church. So the fiance would have to convert anyway before a priest would marry them. At that point I would assume the children would be raised Catholic. Like I said, I am very family oriented I think I'd be a horribly selfish mother LOL I would want my children and grandbabies to attend church with me. This wouldn't be possible if one of my children converted to another sect of Christianity altogether.

[SumTinWong]

Well, I may be wrong, but from what I understand a priest will not marry a couple unless both parties are Catholic and if they are not married in the Catholic faith, the marriage is not recognized by the church.
No not true. The future wife I believe has to sign something or verbally agree to raise the kids Catholic, but the spouse does not have to convert. Sucks to be the kids of they want to be something else I guess.

[fluffy_rainbow]

No not true. The future wife I believe has to sign something or verbally agree to raise the kids Catholic, but the spouse does not have to convert. Sucks to be the kids of they want to be something else I guess.

Perhaps that's just in cases of Mass weddings? Either way, it is sad for the children.

[BjBarnett]

yeah like uncle bud said a priest will marry a Catholic with a non-catholic but the non-catholic would have to agree to raise the children in the Catholic faith.

heres another question what would you guys think about having the kids baptised as infants? her parents have voiced concerns about that (well a little more than concerns but ya know).

is infant baptism a huge "no no" in the Baptist community? I mean would that be something that would be looked down upon and thus the childs baptism wouldnt be valid in the eyes of the baptist family? which I guess it would matter much since baptism is not required for salvation in the Baptist faith (is the right?). but still that could cause some rifts.

I hope that most of the family will accept me and my ways. Crystal is also probably going to convert to the Catholic faith when she becomes of age (18). I feel as though they may take some resentment at me for her conversion as well. anymore opinions? I would appreciate all that I could get.

[BjBarnett]

Perhaps that's just in cases of Mass weddings? Either way, it is sad for the children.

well either way they would either be raised in one faith or the other. but the fact of the matter is they would at some point come to an age when they would make there own decision.

would raising a child in the Catholic faith be a bad thing in the Baptist faith?

[SumTinWong]

heres another question what would you guys think about having the kids baptised as infants? her parents have voiced concerns about that (well a little more than concerns but ya know).
Whether or not it is a big concern in the Baptist church (it is by the way), it is up to the parents to raise the kids the best way they see fit. But I would not expect the average Baptist grandparent to be thrilled about the idea.

Crystal is also probably going to convert to the Catholic faith when she becomes of age (18).
I would hope so since she is sporting the Catholic icon now :)

[SumTinWong]

would raising a child in the Catholic faith be a bad thing in the Baptist faith?
Yes. Plain and simple it would be the same in your church as well. If you raised the kids in the Baptist church your people would say they are not in the fullness of the faith. You can pretty much expect the same from this side.

[BjBarnett]

Whether or not it is a big concern in the Baptist church (it is by the way), it is up to the parents to raise the kids the best way they see fit. But I would not expect the average Baptist grandparent to be thrilled about the idea.

hehe yeah i suspect if i were in there shoes I wouldnt be thrilled either.

[aReformedPatriot]

hehe thanks for the response uncle bud.

Crystals family isnt giving us a hard time visibly yet but im afraid that maybe around the corner as they are very much against the idea of us getting married in a Catholic church by a Catholic priest. They have actually indicated that they may not attend the wedding if it was in a Catholic church by a Catholic priest. Needless to say they are very much against the idea of raising our pontential children as Catholics so im having reasonable fears that as we marriage becomes more and more likly that the opposition will increase.

so i figured id get the opinions of the Baptist here on Christian forums as away of getting an idea of what to expect and maybe get a better feeling of how to handle the situation.

I would not be to supportive of such a marriage personally. The faiths are diametrically opposed. Your kids would have to be raised Catholic no? I would also be strongly opposed there and I would reject infant baptism. This however doesnt mean that I would hate you or anything like that. That would be biblically wrong, but I would have stand up for what I thought. If I believed you were wrong, why would I allow my daughter, or her kids be raised in that.

Hopefully I never have to deal with this issue, however, I would have nipped it in the bud as a parent. I would have ended the relationship early on by saying "No." And thats because either dating carries the ultimate goal of marriage or something else.


How does she feel about these issues?

[aReformedPatriot]

I would hope so since she is sporting the Catholic icon now :)

I kinda figured this would happen. This is why its important to catch things early on.

[SumTinWong]

I think that if we are going raise our kids to make informed decisions and they still choose to marry a catholic and raise the kids catholic then who am i to say otherwise? I may ask them some pointed questions, and would make sure they knew what they were doing, but in the end we have to trust that we taught them well enough.

Pollyanna I know...

[aReformedPatriot]

I think that if we are going raise our kids to make informed decisions and they still choose to marry a catholic and raise the kids catholic then who am i to say otherwise? I may ask them some pointed questions, and would make sure they knew what they were doing, but in the end we have to trust that we taught them well enough.

Pollyanna I know...

I suppose theres nothing you can do when they are older, but they if they are young enough, start dating in high school, then you can change things (as in this case, shes not 18). But im just obstinate ;)

[SumTinWong]

Oh sure that will work ;) How long has it been since you were a teen? My mom said don't do it, I did it. :)

[BjBarnett]

I would not be to supportive of such a marriage personally. The faiths are diametrically opposed. Your kids would have to be raised Catholic no? I would also be strongly opposed there and I would reject infant baptism. This however doesnt mean that I would hate you or anything like that. That would be biblically wrong, but I would have stand up for what I thought. If I believed you were wrong, why would I allow my daughter, or her kids be raised in that.

Hopefully I never have to deal with this issue, however, I would have nipped it in the bud as a parent. I would have ended the relationship early on by saying "No." And thats because either dating carries the ultimate goal of marriage or something else.


How does she feel about these issues?

thank you for your reply TLE. it is a very honest answer and i appreciate it.

so basically what you are saying is you would end it before it got started it if it were your daughter? interesting.

also Crystal is for the idea of getting married in a Catholic church by a priest (actually she may want to get married outside which is fine by me ^_^). She is also fine with bringing the children up in the faith. like i said before she is on the road of conversion.

[BjBarnett]

I think that if we are going raise our kids to make informed decisions and they still choose to marry a catholic and raise the kids catholic then who am i to say otherwise? I may ask them some pointed questions, and would make sure they knew what they were doing, but in the end we have to trust that we taught them well enough.

Pollyanna I know...

I agree. once our kids are of the age of 18 we can only hope that we have taught them the right path and that they will use those teachings to make the right decisions.

[aReformedPatriot]

Oh sure that will work ;) How long has it been since you were a teen? My mom said don't do it, I did it. :)

I didnt become a Christian until i was 18. So I remember everything that I did to be sneaky sneaky. Thats why if you raise your kid to respect you, and they understand what the bible says about listening to your parents, well then it should work out.


Call me naive if you will, however if that be the case then due punishment is in order. :D :P

[BjBarnett]

TLE,

just wondering but would it make a difference if your daughter married a pentecostal, luthern, methodist, or so forth? or is it just the differences between the Baptist and the Catholic's that would make you not approve of the marriage?

[aReformedPatriot]

thank you for your reply TLE. it is a very honest answer and i appreciate it.

so basically what you are saying is you would end it before it got started it if it were your daughter? interesting.

also Crystal is for the idea of getting married in a Catholic church by a priest (actually she may want to get married outside which is fine by me ^_^). She is also fine with bringing the children up in the faith. like i said before she is on the road of conversion.

Your welcome. And yes thats what I am saying. Its the buisness of the parent to do what he/she feels is in the best interest of the child. In this case, as was pointed out earlier, that on either side the fullness of truth would be viewed as lacking. The first thing I'd want to know about this kid is if he's Christian. I'd sit down and have a talk with him, I would probe his understanding of the faith. The second thing I'd want to know is what denomination. If I dont like it, then he's gone. Plain and simple. I would make him understand it as well.

As a parent I think I would be irresponible not to.

[SumTinWong]

I didnt become a Christian until i was 18. So I remember everything that I did to be sneaky sneaky. Thats why if you raise your kid to respect you, and they understand what the bible says about listening to your parents, well then it should work out.


Call me naive if you will, however if that be the case then due punishment is in order. :D :P
I think we as Christians can be glad that Karma is a horse hockey belief otherwise some of us would be getting our butts handed to us by our kids someday...LOL

I agree in a perfect world a kid would listen to the parent. And in some cases it does happen that a kid will listen to their parent. These kids usually get their lunch money stolen and are candidates for super wedgies, but they are around :)

[aReformedPatriot]

I think we as Christians can be glad that Karma is a horse hockey belief otherwise some of us would be getting our butts handed to us by our kids someday...LOL

I agree in a perfect world a kid would listen to the parent. And in some cases it does happen that a kid will listen to their parent. These kids usually get their lunch money stolen and are candidates for super wedgies, but they are around :)

Kids dont listen to your uncle, you can be cool and obeidiant too. Uncle Bud just has a fever right now :D ^_^

[SumTinWong]

hahaha...

You have no proof that being obedient is cool because there is no such thing as an obedient teenager. It is an oxymoron ;)

[BjBarnett]

Your welcome. And yes thats what I am saying. Its the buisness of the parent to do what he/she feels is in the best interest of the child. In this case, as was pointed out earlier, that on either side the fullness of truth would be viewed as lacking. The first thing I'd want to know about this kid is if he's Christian. I'd sit down and have a talk with him, I would probe his understanding of the faith. The second thing I'd want to know is what denomination. If I dont like it, then he's gone. Plain and simple. I would make him understand it as well.

As a parent I think I would be irresponible not to.

i agree with you to an extent. I probably wouldnt let my son/daughter date a non-christian. thanks again for your answer. I hope my future inlaws dont take that approach though lol ^_^

[aReformedPatriot]

hahaha...

You have no proof that being obedient is cool because there is no such thing as an obedient teenager. It is an oxymoron

:eek: grumble grumble grumble.
:eek: grumble grumble grumble.
:eek: grumble grumble grumble.
:eek: grumble grumble grumble.

Bro. Mark

[eldermike]

I have a question, and I would ask it just this way if I were the parent of the Baptist daughter. If the Lord put you two together how did you together, come to the conclusion to convert the Baptist to Catholic, and not to the conclusion to convert the Catholic to Baptist? I would facilitate a conversation between the two of them on this issue. I would see that discussion as important.

[ZiSunka]

Hello everyone!

I have a question. this may seem like an odd question but never the less its one id like to have your opinions on :D

anyway how would you (as Baptist) feel about a Catholic (like me ^_^) marrying into a entirely Baptist family? If you were apart of this family (who is entirely Baptist) what would your feelings be about this? How would you feel about your child (or cousin or niece) marrying in a Catholic church by a Catholic priest? any input here would be greatly appreciated :) thanks in advanced.

I think it would depend on how devout you are. If you constantly went around telling us all that catholicism is superior or the only way and trying to convert us, that would be annoying and hard to take over the long run. But if you are willing to accept our differences and love us anyway, I think it would be okay.

Having been born of a catholic/presbyterian marriage, they can work, but they are harder because both people aren't on the same spiritual path so to speak. If one is receiving grace through sacrements and sacrementals and the other one doesn't want to deal with all that because they believe in grace by faith alone, it can create a lot of friction that marital love cannot overcome. My parents dealt with it by committing themselves to one faith and to raising us children in that faith. It was hard for my dad, but the fact that my mother was also a born-again believer who trusted in salvation through faith in Christ alone made it somewhat better. He sacrificed a lot spiritually, to maintain his commitment to my mom, and I don't think he ever regretted it, but I know after my mom died, he went back to the church where he grew up and felt he belonged.

Neither family completely rejected the other person, but neither fully accepted the other either.

It is better to marry someone on the same spiritual path as you are, because no marriage can be successful if you aren't walking together in the same direction!

[BjBarnett]

I have a question, and I would ask it just this way if I were the parent of the Baptist daughter. If the Lord put you two together how did you together, come to the conclusion to convert the Baptist to Catholic, and not to the conclusion to convert the Catholic to Baptist? I would facilitate a conversation between the two of them on this issue. I would see that discussion as important.

do you want me to answer that? or is that just what you would do?

[BjBarnett]

I think it would depend on how devout you are. If you constantly went around telling us all that catholicism is superior or the only way and trying to convert us, that would be annoying and hard to take over the long run. But if you are willing to accept our differences and love us anyway, I think it would be okay.

Having been born of a catholic/presbyterian marriage, they can work, but they are harder because both people aren't on the same spiritual path so to speak. If one is receiving grace through sacrements and sacrementals and the other one doesn't want to deal with all that because they believe in grace by faith alone, it can create a lot of friction that marital love cannot overcome. My parents dealt with it by committing themselves to one faith and to raising us children in that faith. It was hard for my dad, but the fact that my mother was also a born-again believer who trusted in salvation through faith in Christ alone made it somewhat better. He sacrificed a lot spiritually, to maintain his commitment to my mom, and I don't think he ever regretted it, but I know after my mom died, he went back to the church where he grew up and felt he belonged.

Neither family completely rejected the other person, but neither fully accepted the other either.

It is better to marry someone on the same spiritual path as you are, because no marriage can be successful if you aren't walking together in the same direction!

well crystal and i are walking on the same spirtual path because she is converting to Catholicism. the problem really lies with the family on the matter.

[ZiSunka]

well crystal and i are walking on the same spirtual path because she is converting to Catholicism. the problem really lies with the family on the matter.

I would have a heart-to-heart talk with my daughter and ask her why she wanted to convert, and if it was merely so she could marry a catholic man, then I would encourage her to wait to marry until she is more mature. Changing religions merely to please some man is immature and dangerous. If he requires you to convert to his religion or he won't marry you, then he will demand other concessions at some time or another, too. If he is willing to force you to bend to his will on something important like religion, then he will probably dominate the relationship in all sorts of ways.

But if she was converting because after thorough research she feels that it is the correct view of salvation, and she can support that in terms I can understand, and not just something like, "The mass is so beautiful, that's why I want to be catholic," then I would step back and let her go.

Either way, I would love my daughter very much and never allow anything to come between us. And either way, once she was married, I would do everything to support that marriage.

[BjBarnett]

but you dont have to be catholic to marry a catholic :scratch:

[MbiaJc]

Hello everyone!

I have a question. this may seem like an odd question but never the less its one id like to have your opinions on :D

anyway how would you (as Baptist) feel about a Catholic (like me ^_^) marrying into a entirely Baptist family? If you were apart of this family (who is entirely Baptist) what would your feelings be about this? How would you feel about your child (or cousin or niece) marrying in a Catholic church by a Catholic priest? any input here would be greatly appreciated :) thanks in advanced.

Well I can tell you how I feel, because I am Baptist, my oldest daughter married a Catholic.

I was devestated at first till I went to a Catholic service. I found that the Gospel of Jesus Christ was being proclaimed there. What else could I ask for?

[eldermike]

do you want me to answer that? or is that just what you would do?

No need, it's just what I would do.

[RED that's ME]

The man is suppose to be the spiritual leader of the home. If the husband and wife have different faiths where the doctrine is really different as in Catholic/Baptist how is the husband going to help her grow in her faith and beliefs? IMO a husband and wife should be of the same faith/doctrinal beliefs. Marriage can be hard enough without having "bigger issues" to constantly deal with.
As for the family part I know my parents would not be happy if I married someone who was outside of my faith and doctrinal beliefs. Even when a couple shares the same doctrinal beliefs but a different denomination can cause problems. My dad grew up in a Missionary Alliance church but became a Baptist in his 20's he met my mom in a Baptist church his mom wasn't too happy about it either and gave her opinion over it even though there really isn't any doctrinal differences.
You need to look at it from the parent's point of view too. You are taking their daughter who has been raised to believe doctrine totally different than what you do. I am sure you're aware what most Baptists believes about the Catholic church and it's doctrine. If Crystal is fine with what you believe and the Catholic church and you are both going to share your faith together and you know totally that it's God's will for you to be together then go for it. The Bible does talk about the husband/wife cleaving to each other and leaving their father/mother. That's not to say you totally cut them off either when you marry someone you're not only marrying them but the family as well in a sense.
http://smileys.smileycentral.com/cat/11/11_3_2.gif (http://www.smileycentral.com/?partner=ZSzeb001)

[Gwenyfur]

I haven't read the entire thread yet, since I prefer to address the original question before perusing opinions and answers LOL

I am baptist...My family is baptist, my sister is anglican, she married an anglican who's shortly to be ordained as a priest.

Religion is just that religion. The only thing that would matter to me (if this were my daughter) is how is his relationship with Jesus Christ? Is his faith grounded in the traditions of the church, or in the death and resurrection of Jesus Christ? Does he seek God's will for his life, or does he go after his "own understanding"? A church is a church, it's wood, brick, mortar...It's the matter of his salvation that would matter to me.

Other things I would address would be about family structure. Will you honour my daughter in your marriage. Will you treat her as your own flesh? How will you teach my grandchildren? Will they be taught the gospel? Will there be daily family devotionals? As a father will you teach them the love and judgement of Jesus Christ. Will you see to it that their faith is scriptural?

But I also admit to be an overprotective mom. ;)

[BjBarnett]

thank you all for your replys :) keep them coming if you got any additional things you would like to add :)

[aReformedPatriot]

The man is suppose to be the spiritual leader of the home. If the husband and wife have different faiths where the doctrine is really different as in Catholic/Baptist how is the husband going to help her grow in her faith and beliefs? IMO a husband and wife should be of the same faith/doctrinal beliefs. Marriage can be hard enough without having "bigger issues" to constantly deal with.


Thats a very good point.

[Gwenyfur]

I think we as Christians can be glad that Karma is a horse hockey belief otherwise some of us would be getting our butts handed to us by our kids someday...LOL

I agree in a perfect world a kid would listen to the parent. And in some cases it does happen that a kid will listen to their parent. These kids usually get their lunch money stolen and are candidates for super wedgies, but they are around :)
God has blessed me with one such daughter. She's 16 and respectful, obedient and has her feet firmly grounded in her faith.
She's rarely picked on at school. Yes, she's a band geek, and tall and thin...but she's a beauty...and it's a beauty that radiates from way deeper than the looks God blessed her with.

And yes, when she's otu with her friends she takes her Bible with her. (She agrees that any temptation she faces is easier to face with Matthew Mark Luke and John with her :D)

[Gold Dragon]

I think it is important that the husband and wife share similar doctrinal views and it sounds like they do in this situation since the wife appears to be on the road to becoming Catholic.

If the parents are very conservative Baptists, they won't like it, but hopefully they'll see that it is more important for the new family to be on the same page than it is for them to be on the same page as their daughter. "Leave and cleave".

My parents would have been upset if I married a Catholic. I wouldn't be as concerned if my children did. Although I am not very representative of Baptists.

[aReformedPatriot]

Although I am not very representative of Baptists.

I would have never guessed had you not just said that ;)

How are you today GD?

[Gold Dragon]

I would have never guessed had you not just said that ;)

How are you today GD?

Doing well, thanks. :)

I should add that my wife would probably have some problems with our kids marrying Catholics. That would be an interesting hypothetical discussion for us to have.

[BjBarnett]

maybe you could have her post her thoughts on here Gold Dragon :D

[aReformedPatriot]

maybe you could have her post her thoughts on here Gold Dragon :D

So Crystal is on CF I gather? What is her CF name?

[BjBarnett]

So Crystal is on CF I gather? What is her CF name?

her CF name is crystalbrooke.

[Lutherrunner]

thank you all for your replys :) keep them coming if you got any additional things you would like to add :)

you could just both be Lutherans........;)

[BjBarnett]

you could just both be Lutherans........;)

haha I once heard someone jokingly say if a Catholic and a Baptist were combined you would get a Luthern lol... so maybe our kids will be Luthern ;)

[aReformedPatriot]

haha I once heard someone jokingly say if a Catholic and a Baptist were combined you would get a Luthern lol... so maybe our kids will be Luthern ;)

ya know.... in strange way, this makes perfect sense ^_^

[CrystalBrooke]

well its nice to see that some of you would let you're children marry a Catholic. Him being Catholic isnt what bothers my mom and step-dad, its the children they're worried about. Mom has told me point blank ''you're not raising my grandkids Catholic''...and of course im sitting there thinking...hmmm..not your kids..not your deciscion...of course im scared to death of my mom so i didnt say it like that...i just told her that they were my kids and left it at that lol but i wonder, why would you bother telling your kids that they CAN NOT marry a Catholic, or CAN NOT raise your grandkids Catholic..bc you do realize that when they get of age (18), and move out, you cant do anything about it. and i read an earlier post that seems to imply that Ben is why im converting...i assure you all that is not the case...infact, ive argued with him about Catholicism til i learned about it, and i felt that it was the right place for me...Ben did not influence me.:)

[FaithWeaver]

In my personal opinion I would have had a hard time marrying into a different faith or religion. That is just how I was raised. You know, a house divided can not stand and all that stuff. It may or may not cause a problem in the future, especially if any children are involved.

If God put the two of you together, then it WILL work. You need to seek God's will and make sure that the marrige is of him.

I'm sure that you are a wonderful guy. If you love her and she is okay with it, then don't worry about what any of her family or anyone else thinks. It only takes 3 to make a marriage work; man, woman, and God.

God Bless you Guys

[ZiSunka]

well its nice to see that some of you would let you're children marry a Catholic. Him being Catholic isnt what bothers my mom and step-dad, its the children they're worried about. Mom has told me point blank ''you're not raising my grandkids Catholic''...and of course im sitting there thinking...hmmm..not your kids..not your deciscion...of course im scared to death of my mom so i didnt say it like that...i just told her that they were my kids and left it at that lol but i wonder, why would you bother telling your kids that they CAN NOT marry a Catholic, or CAN NOT raise your grandkids Catholic..bc you do realize that when they get of age (18), and move out, you cant do anything about it. and i read an earlier post that seems to imply that Ben is why im converting...i assure you all that is not the case...infact, ive argued with him about Catholicism til i learned about it, and i felt that it was the right place for me...Ben did not influence me.:)

Wait a minute! Sweetie! You are 16 years old. You should still be obeying your parents and you are in no way ready to convert to another religion so you can get married! I can't blame your parents for being alarmed about the whole situation! My heart sank when I saw your age, because you have a lot of life to be living before you are ready for marriage. If my 16 year old daughter was dating a 19 year old, I would have problems with it, too, and if my 16 year old was planning a wedding, I would put an end to the relationship immediately.

I think if your parents are only concerned with you converting to a different religion and not that you are 16 and getting married, they may not be coming down on you hard enough.

I just can't believe it. 16 is way too young to even be thinking about getting married, let alone joining her boyfriend's church so she can marry him!

[GreenEyedLady]

Ben is why im converting...i assure you all that is not the case...infact, ive argued with him about Catholicism til i learned about it, and i felt that it was the right place for me...Ben did not influence me.:)


This is very very hard to believe!
Stick with your parents honey. They know you much better than you know yourself.
GEL

[Gold Dragon]

I gotta agree with lambslove. I'm more concerned about your ages than I am about the difference in Christian tradition. Wow, that is a lot to think about at 16. If you are really going through with this, I think family support is something you guys will really need.

[Gwenyfur]

I have a 16 year old daughter. No matter what the guy's religion, there's *no* way I would even permit him to come into my home or near my daughter again if he proposed marriage. It's completely irresponsible in disrespectful to propose something as life altering, and such a life long covenant with God especially when it's children of your age. I haven't a clue what either of your parents are thinking to allow such conversations and plans.

[BjBarnett]

I gotta agree with lambslove. I'm more concerned about your ages than I am about the difference in Christian tradition. Wow, that is a lot to think about at 16. If you are really going through with this, I think family support is something you guys will really need.

haha we will probably get married when crystal is about 18 or so. in our culture and area it is not uncommon for people to marry when one of them is still in high school. but we likly wont do that. so the age thing isnt really that big of a deal to either of our parents.

You should still be obeying your parents and you are in no way ready to convert to another religion so you can get married!

shes not converting so she can get married. shes converting because she feels its right to be Catholic.

[ZiSunka]

shes not converting so she can get married. shes converting because she feels its right to be Catholic.



She might be telling you that, but I don't believe a word of it. She's converting because she is in love with you and you won't marry her unless she converts. It happens ALLLLLLL the time with young women, they'll do anything, say anything to keep the man they love.

[Iollain]

I would not like my daughters to be Catholic because of the way the RCC views Mary and the Saints, and statues, as i do not believe the visitations are Mary you can see my point if you think about it, i would be totally heartbroken to see my Grandchildren in the RCC, though the infant baptism would not bother me, the Mary, Saints, and Pope would. But you guys already know that i'm sure lol

[BjBarnett]

She might be telling you that, but I don't believe a word of it. She's converting because she is in love with you and you won't marry her unless she converts. It happens ALLLLLLL the time with young women, they'll do anything, say anything to keep the man they love.

uhh i never said i wouldnt marry her if she wasnt Catholic. in fact I was willing to have a Baptist wedding when she was Baptist. shes converting because that is what is best for her spiritual life. thats a pretty insulting statement you just made.

[BjBarnett]

I have a 16 year old daughter. No matter what the guy's religion, there's *no* way I would even permit him to come into my home or near my daughter again if he proposed marriage. It's completely irresponsible in disrespectful to propose something as life altering, and such a life long covenant with God especially when it's children of your age. I haven't a clue what either of your parents are thinking to allow such conversations and plans.
our parents know what they are doing and besides we are not getting married until crystal turns 18 (or atleast she will be 18 at that time) and even then its not really a matter for the parents.

[ZiSunka]

uhh i never said i wouldnt marry her if she wasnt Catholic. in fact I was willing to have a Baptist wedding when she was Baptist. shes converting because that is what is best for her spiritual life. thats a pretty insulting statement you just made.

So you think if you two broke up, she would still turn catholic? I doubt it.

[BjBarnett]

So you think if you two broke up, she would still turn catholic? I doubt it.

how is it you know more about what she believes than her? odd....

she is her own person and if you even knew her you would know she is doing this on her own will and beliefs.

[BjBarnett]

on second thought this thread is starting to go down hill so if a mod could please close it for me i would appreciate it. i have had my question answered and there is no need to be insulted further. thanks to all who responded.

[mesue]

I will close it for you :)

[mesue]

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