Having a rough time - asking for prayer.

[Vasya Davidovich]

As I have looked around, I have seen a lot of people who love God, the Church, and each other. You remind me of me a couple years ago...

I want to make lots of postings - to involve myself more fully into this amazing community. However, I find myself simultaneously uplifted and depressed. Uplifted, because you are real and in love with God. Depressed because I am not.

I thought maybe to send out a query into the ether, to those who listen, to those who pray and have God's ear... Pray please for someone who has been in rebellion, a sinner far from God, who only wants to get a little closer, and is struggling about how to do that.

That's about it. Thanks.
-Vasya.

[xenia]

Just step through the door and we will love you the best we can!

Welcome to TAW.

In Christ Xenia

[Marjorie]

:crosseo: :crosseo: :crosseo:

We shall all pray for you!

Please stay with us...

God bless you always...

In IC XC,
Marjorie

[countrymousenc]

Vasya, welcome to TAW. We're all strugglers, too, so we understand. I am in love with God, but not nearly enough, yet. I do things every day that show how far I've got to go. Right this moment it is enough that you want to be in love with God. He knows, and He will grant it to you.

In Christ,
Dianne

[Vasya Davidovich]

Wow. I just posted that message. Thank you, Country Mouse, Marjorie, and Xenia. It is just very hard, sometimes, you know? Feeling distant from God, and very alone.

And there is really nothing to beat being away from Holy Communion to get you down, particularly if it is by your own silly choice.

[Grand_Duchess-Elizaveta]

Wow. I just posted that message. Thank you, Country Mouse, Marjorie, and Xenia. It is just very hard, sometimes, you know? Feeling distant from God, and very alone.

And there is really nothing to beat being away from Holy Communion to get you down, particularly if it is by your own silly choice.
Bless you, Vasya! You're in the right place. We can't fix your problem, but we can pray and help bear your burden. I struggle a lot. We all do. It's how we respond to the struggle that concerns God most. He's always waiting for us to come back to Him. What matters is that we keep coming back to Him, asking for His mercy. He will never leave you or forsake you, Vasya. Try not to dwell on your past rebellion. You are at the point of turning back to God, and that is what matters now!:)

[countrymousenc]

And there is really nothing to beat being away from Holy Communion to get you down...

You're right about that. It feels awful to miss Liturgy. I'll be praying that you'll soon be back in attendance where you can get the support you need! :hug:

[Photini]

:hug: Welcome to TAW Vasya. Please stick around with us. :)

[Reader Nilus]

As I have looked around, I have seen a lot of people who love God, the Church, and each other. You remind me of me a couple years ago...

I want to make lots of postings - to involve myself more fully into this amazing community. However, I find myself simultaneously uplifted and depressed. Uplifted, because you are real and in love with God. Depressed because I am not.

I thought maybe to send out a query into the ether, to those who listen, to those who pray and have God's ear... Pray please for someone who has been in rebellion, a sinner far from God, who only wants to get a little closer, and is struggling about how to do that.

That's about it. Thanks.
-Vasya.I can only say forgive me Vasya. I am in worse than you, in sins and rebellion. We all hope for mercy, and Our Church is a hospital for sinners like myself. I know you are closer to the goal than I am.
Reader Nilus

[Rick of Wessex]

Vasya,

God bless you and welcome to TAW! :wave:

In XC, Our Lord,
Rick

[Vasya Davidovich]

Hi, Rick, Nilus, Elizaveta, and Photini. Good to meet you too. Thank you for your heartwarming words.

As for sticking around, I have to say I am enchanted with a place that allows Orthodox Christians to meet. There aren't that many where I am.

One of the problems with rebellion is that you repel all divine overtures. It becomes habitual. Exposing one's heart to Him is hard.

It makes me think of Eustace, in C.S.Lewis' Voyage of the Dawn Treader. Stripping oneself of one's dragonskin is hard, very hard... and then [horror!] we discover it requires God Himself to get down to the heart of things. All that pain, that sacrifice, and it is nothing except a signal of a turning. To cut through the layers of serpentine flesh, nothing equals Aslan Himself.

Anyway, I am hoping and praying that all goes well and I can make it in to Church this weekend. As Nilus the Reader says, the Church is a hospital, and this invalid needs his medicine of immortality.

Yours,
Vasya.

[Suzannah]

God bless you Vasya,

I am in the Life Raft with you. You bail on one side, and I'll bail on the other. We can talk as we work and maybe encourage each other. I know that God must be merciful because He let me in to His Church and it would take A LOT of mercy for Him to do that. So you must not despair. If He let me in , just even a little bit inside the farthest door, how much more He will welcome you when we reach land...*Hey! You bail very well....show me how to do that! :)
Pray for me...I think my side of the raft might have a leak....It's because I'm too fat :cry: ...
Love,
Suzannah

[Grand_Duchess-Elizaveta]

Hi, Rick, Nilus, Elizaveta, and Photini. Good to meet you too. Thank you for your heartwarming words.

As for sticking around, I have to say I am enchanted with a place that allows Orthodox Christians to meet. There aren't that many where I am.

One of the problems with rebellion is that you repel all divine overtures. It becomes habitual. Exposing one's heart to Him is hard.

It makes me think of Eustace, in C.S.Lewis' Voyage of the Dawn Treader. Stripping oneself of one's dragonskin is hard, very hard... and then [horror!] we discover it requires God Himself to get down to the heart of things. All that pain, that sacrifice, and it is nothing except a signal of a turning. To cut through the layers of serpentine flesh, nothing equals Aslan Himself.

Anyway, I am hoping and praying that all goes well and I can make it in to Church this weekend. As Nilus the Reader says, the Church is a hospital, and this invalid needs his medicine of immortality.

Yours,
Vasya.
Beautifully said, Vasya! :) I'm truly praying for you, and I humbly ask you to do the same for me. Lord knows, I need it!

[Vasya Davidovich]

Thank you, GDE.

I just wanted to let those who were praying know that I made it back to Church this weekend. Thanks to my rebellion, I am still under excommunication and will be for some weeks yet, but my brothers and sisters (and yes, my spiritual father) made me feel very welcome and loved. So that's good.

I imagine - heck, I know - that this process is going to be long and uphill, and I think I would be less than honest if I didn't admit that I am not particularly looking forward to it. However, I think that I would rather the pain of travailing onwards the pain of standing still in a place without God. It is really quite quite miserable.

So thanks again to all my on-line brothers and sisters who supported me so strongly last week through their kind words and their prayers. It is deeply appreciated.

Your little brother in Christ,
Vasya.

[Grand_Duchess-Elizaveta]

Thank you, GDE.

I just wanted to let those who were praying know that I made it back to Church this weekend. Thanks to my rebellion, I am still under excommunication and will be for some weeks yet, but my brothers and sisters (and yes, my spiritual father) made me feel very welcome and loved. So that's good.

I imagine - heck, I know - that this process is going to be long and uphill, and I think I would be less than honest if I didn't admit that I am not particularly looking forward to it. However, I think that I would rather the pain of travailing onwards the pain of standing still in a place without God. It is really quite quite miserable.

So thanks again to all my on-line brothers and sisters who supported me so strongly last week through their kind words and their prayers. It is deeply appreciated.

Your little brother in Christ,
Vasya.
:clap: This is great news, Vasya! :clap: We fall down, we get up, we fall down, we get up.:thumbsup:

[Andromeda]

That's wonderful! I'm so glad to hear it. One step at a time, it doesn't matter how big or small. Every step towards Him is a triumph. :)

[Vasya Davidovich]

:clap: This is great news, Vasya! :clap: We fall down, we get up, we fall down, we get up.:thumbsup:
Thanks, GDE! I was idly wondering, where exactly does that quote come from? I know that there was a Christian hit a while back with those words forming part of the lyrics... yet I suspect that the story of the monk "falling down and getting up" comes from a more ancient source. Am I right?

This is, I admit, a total aside, and has little if nothing to do with the thread subject.
-Vasya.

[Orthosdoxa]

Vasya, you've been in my prayers as well.

Andromeda, welcome to TAW. Tell us a bit about y'self.

[Orthosdoxa]

Thanks, GDE! I was idly wondering, where exactly does that quote come from? I know that there was a Christian hit a while back with those words forming part of the lyrics... yet I suspect that the story of the monk "falling down and getting up" comes from a more ancient source. Am I right?

This is, I admit, a total aside, and has little if nothing to do with the thread subject.
-Vasya.
A little story GDE and I once heard about someone who asked an old monk how to live the Christian life. That was his reply. :)

[Grand_Duchess-Elizaveta]

Yes, there is a specific story about a monk that goes with the "We fall down..." quote. Unfortunately, I don't remeber the specifics!:doh: Anonykat?! Do you know this story? I can find it if no one else knows.

[Grand_Duchess-Elizaveta]

A little story GDE and I once heard about someone who asked an old monk how to live the Christian life. That was his reply. :)
Thanks, Kat.:)

[Grand_Duchess-Elizaveta]

Well, I can't find the monk thing, but this is really good, too:

It is always possible to make a new start by means of repentance. 'For a righteous man may fall seven times And rise again' (Prov. 24:16). And if you fall again, then rise again, without despairing at all of your salvation, no matter what happens. So long as you do not surrender yourself willingly to the enemy, your patient endurance, combined with self-reproach, will suffice for your salvation. 'For we ourselves were also once foolish, disobedient,'says St. Paul, '...not by works of righteousness which we have done, but according to His mercy He saved us' (***. 3:3,5). St. Peter of Damaskos.

[MariaRegina]

Hi, Rick, Nilus, Elizaveta, and Photini. Good to meet you too. Thank you for your heartwarming words.

As for sticking around, I have to say I am enchanted with a place that allows Orthodox Christians to meet. There aren't that many where I am.

One of the problems with rebellion is that you repel all divine overtures. It becomes habitual. Exposing one's heart to Him is hard.

It makes me think of Eustace, in C.S.Lewis' Voyage of the Dawn Treader. Stripping oneself of one's dragonskin is hard, very hard... and then [horror!] we discover it requires God Himself to get down to the heart of things. All that pain, that sacrifice, and it is nothing except a signal of a turning. To cut through the layers of serpentine flesh, nothing equals Aslan Himself.

Anyway, I am hoping and praying that all goes well and I can make it in to Church this weekend. As Nilus the Reader says, the Church is a hospital, and this invalid needs his medicine of immortality.

Yours,
Vasya.


That whole scene of the dragon bathing in the water of Narnia seven times is so very scriptural and so vivid. The lepers had to bathe to be cleansed; however, we cannot cleanse ourselves from our own sinfulness. God must do so for us. Our own triple immersion into the Holy Waters of Baptism seems to be the theme of this passage in the Voyage of the Dawn Treader.

What do you think?

[Vasya Davidovich]

Well, I can't find the monk thing, but this is really good, too:

It is always possible to make a new start by means of repentance. 'For a righteous man may fall seven times And rise again' (Prov. 24:16). And if you fall again, then rise again, without despairing at all of your salvation, no matter what happens. So long as you do not surrender yourself willingly to the enemy, your patient endurance, combined with self-reproach, will suffice for your salvation. 'For we ourselves were also once foolish, disobedient,'says St. Paul, '...not by works of righteousness which we have done, but according to His mercy He saved us' (***. 3:3,5). St. Peter of Damaskos.
Well, dang. I strongly suspect that what I did was exactly that: surrendering myself willingly, if not wilfully, to the enemy. :sigh:

Hello, Anonykat and Andromeda. Andromeda, welcome to the mix! Anonykat, thank you for your prayers. I knew somebody was praying. This week keeps getting better. :)
-Vasya.

[MariaRegina]

Well, I can't find the monk thing, but this is really good, too:

It is always possible to make a new start by means of repentance. 'For a righteous man may fall seven times And rise again' (Prov. 24:16). And if you fall again, then rise again, without despairing at all of your salvation, no matter what happens. So long as you do not surrender yourself willingly to the enemy, your patient endurance, combined with self-reproach, will suffice for your salvation. 'For we ourselves were also once foolish, disobedient,'says St. Paul, '...not by works of righteousness which we have done, but according to His mercy He saved us' (***. 3:3,5). St. Peter of Damaskos.

The story goes that someone asked a monk what he did all day long..

The response .... I fall down, get up, fall down, get up, fall down, get up.

We just have to keep getting up after each fall.

[Vasya Davidovich]

That whole scene of the dragon bathing in the water of Narnia seven times is so very scriptural and so vivid. The lepers had to bathe to be cleansed; however, we cannot cleanse ourselves from our own sinfulness. God must do so for us. Our own triple immersion into the Holy Waters of Baptism seems to be the theme of this passage in the Voyage of the Dawn Treader.

What do you think?
Aria:
It strikes me that there are several elements at work. Or perhaps two. I should probably think things over before launching into responses. Um.

The first thing to note is the relationship between Eustace (the dragon) and Aslan. Eustace takes several steps towards Christ, towards redemption, in voluntarily stripping himself of his dragonskin. It is remeniscent of the Prodigal's steps towards his ancestral home. However, Eustace cannot do the stripping of his filth on his own. Neither did the Prodigal make the entire journey alone. Rather, he was met on his way by his father. We make the first steps, C.S.Lewis seems to be saying, but it requires God in and by His Grace to complete the action that we are striving to make.

The second thing to note is the baptismal scene. Here I suspect Lewis may have been influenced by his Protestant upbringing - in his separation of repentance from baptism. Orthodox understanding seems to me to be much more fluid. On the other hand, this is a work of fiction - of fantasy, where symbols can and should be allowed to co-exist without condemning the author of heresy.

My two cents. Reactions, anyone? - Vasya.

[Grand_Duchess-Elizaveta]

Well, dang. I strongly suspect that what I did was exactly that: surrendering myself willingly, if not wilfully, to the enemy. :sigh:

Hello, Anonykat and Andromeda. Andromeda, welcome to the mix! Anonykat, thank you for your prayers. I knew somebody was praying. This week keeps getting better. :)
-Vasya.
Well, you may have yielded to the enemy for a season, but coming back to God is proof you did not totally surrender yourself to him. At least, I don't think so. How about focussing on the rest of the paragraph?:D

And I was praying, too.:) Whatever that's worth.

[MariaRegina]

Aria:
It strikes me that there are several elements at work. Or perhaps two. I should probably think things over before launching into responses. Um.

The first thing to note is the relationship between Eustace (the dragon) and Aslan. Eustace takes several steps towards Christ, towards redemption, in voluntarily stripping himself of his dragonskin. It is remeniscent of the Prodigal's steps towards his ancestral home. However, Eustace cannot do the stripping of his filth on his own. Neither did the Prodigal make the entire journey alone. Rather, he was met on his way by his father. We make the first steps, C.S.Lewis seems to be saying, but it requires God in and by His Grace to complete the action that we are striving to make.

The second thing to note is the baptismal scene. Here I suspect Lewis may have been influenced by his Protestant upbringing - in his separation of repentance from baptism. Orthodox understanding seems to me to be much more fluid. On the other hand, this is a work of fiction - of fantasy, where symbols can and should be allowed to co-exist without condemning the author of heresy.

My two cents. Reactions, anyone? - Vasya.


As long as we have breath -- we are on the way. Holy Baptism is the beginning of the walk with Christ, where we put on Christ. The Eucharist strengthens us and helps us reach Theosis, which is our goal. The journey is not complete until we have run the race and entered heaven.

[Vasya Davidovich]

GDE:
Didn't mean to slight you. Or anyone else, for that matter! I am a sinner, in need of prayer from anyone and anybody who will give it. That you, along with those others that have prayed and continue to pray, choose to do so ... this is astonishing. It is a miracle of the brotherhood (and sisterhood) of the Church. It is a miracle of feeling and generosity and compassion beyond what we learn to expect in the world around us. It is a miracle, because I am unworthy.

I have responded in delight to one person's prayer, because this is one more miracle on top of so many others. Perhaps my reaction was disproportionate, but I find my heart swelling within me at the grace that is being poured upon me. So thank you personally for your prayers, and for your kind (and sage) words.

I extend this heartfelt thankyou also to those I may not have mentioned by name - those who perhaps remain anonymous. Your prayers are appreciated. They make a difference. I know.
God love you all. I know I do. :hug: - Little brother Vasya.

[Grand_Duchess-Elizaveta]

GDE:
Didn't mean to slight you. Or anyone else, for that matter! I am a sinner, in need of prayer from anyone and anybody who will give it. That you, along with those others that have prayed and continue to pray, choose to do so ... this is astonishing. It is a miracle of the brotherhood (and sisterhood) of the Church. It is a miracle of feeling and generosity and compassion beyond what we learn to expect in the world around us. It is a miracle, because I am unworthy.

.
Of course you didn't slight me or anyone else, silly!:hug: You are a very eloquent writer, btw. Hmmm, perhaps we can make some sort of a deal where you write my college papers for me, and I'll pray for you or say goofy things to make you laugh (I am actually better at that last one :P ). Deal? ;)

[Rick of Wessex]

...and I'll pray for you or say goofy things to make you laugh (I am actually better at that last one :P ). Deal? ;)

It's true. The Duchess has a wonderful and witty sense of humor that can put a smile on anybody's face. ;)

In XC,
Rick

[Grand_Duchess-Elizaveta]

It's true. The Duchess has a wonderful and witty sense of humor that can put a smile on anybody's face. ;)

In XC,
Rick
Thanks! :blush:

[Vasya Davidovich]

Of course you didn't slight me or anyone else, silly!:hug: You are a very eloquent writer, btw. Hmmm, perhaps we can make some sort of a deal where you write my college papers for me, and I'll pray for you or say goofy things to make you laugh (I am actually better at that last one :P ). Deal? ;)
Deal! I love writing college papers! It is a sickness, but maybe I will get over it someday. ;) -Vasya.